I'm really concerned by the rise of aphobia and infighting that's rising in the aspec community recently. I think a lot of it has to do with people wanting to ship characters, but they're low-key throwing us repulsed aros and aces under the bus by doing so.
I keep seeing black/green-stripe, non-partnering, and romance/sex-repulsed aspecs get called things like "robotic" and "heartless" and "bad stereotypes" and instead of people calling that stuff out, I just see everyone being like "yeah it's a spectrum!" and totally ignore that they are constantly insulting and dehumanizing an entire part of that spectrum because it's not as interesting to them.
Like, I get it, it's fandom, have fun, do whatever, I guess. But maybe stop calling actual people's experiences such cruel things? Like, fuck you if you say that shit! I'm a real person! Stop calling my actual lived experiences such disgusting things, oh my god!
I am a human being worthy of dignity and respect even though I experience no romantic or sexual attraction and am disgusted by the idea of romance and sex and will never have a romantic or sexual partner. The idea that reflecting myself and my real experiences in a character makes them robotic or heartless or a monster or a stereotype is genuinely aphobic, and I don't care if you're aspec yourself if you're insulting me like that! Aces can be arophobic, aces can even be acephobic, and vice versa.
Internalized aphobia can be a real thing, and aspecs are not immune to societal pressures of amatonormativity, and the constant refusal by everyone to even stop for a second and consider this stuff is so fucked up.
I want to support my romance-favorable and sex-favorable and greyro and greyace peers, but it feels like all I ever see from them recently is insults towards us repulsed people, and it genuinely breaks my heart. We're supposed to be a community! Please, I don't want this infighting! I want to be able to stand hand in hand as we raise awareness about the a-spectrums and fight against the amatonormative ideas that hurt us all!
-sincerely, a very tired repulsed aroace
