the author's openly advertised fetish

actually i dont need a pinned post that detailed. im mysterious and cool like this

the apple tree near my apartment smelled like my childhood today. i caught a whiff of early summer air and remnants of petrichor lingering on the asphalt from the rainstorm last night. the colors looked like they used to, not brighter, just more real. i was waking up from nearly a decade's long dream and i was saving snails off the road. and i was friends with all the boys in class because they were just tall enough to pick up those fresh apples from that tree in the playground, and if i played tag with them, they'd give me some too. and i was friends with a girl named rihanna, we pronounced her name the finnish way because that's all we knew back then. i was watching glitter force with a girl i knew before i was even born. we were eating too much chocolate and staying up until 2 am. i guess life never really changes, it just recolors itself, falls into a new pattern. here i am, still awake until 2 am, still with a friend, with several friends, with a smile on my face and bruises on my knees. bottle of soda or can of beer, i should just stop worrying about not being "myself" enough, because i've always been them.

when you're someone with unmedicated adhd, it's always good to have things that get you out of bed when you're struggling with executive dysfunction. like your friend texting you that she's picking up edibles from the plug and then heading to your place

scrolling tiktok because i want to get scared but then i just get pissed off instead EVIL EVIL EVIL i wanted to engage in mental self-harm but instead i have to look at people whining about how they're actually the Enlightened Leftist while advocating for censorship and using "gross fantasy" as an inherently negative thing

love whatever the fuck sami zayn and shinsuke nakamura had going on in 2019 for a brief moment there