I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO UNMUTE,
Captions:
Gaston: "Everyone knows her father's a lunatic. He was in there tonight, raving-"
Fast placed music plays as the scene changes.
Gaston: "Whoa! Slow down Maurice."

oozey mess
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Xuebing Du
YOU ARE THE REASON
Three Goblin Art

if i look back, i am lost
Mike Driver

pixel skylines

⣠Chile in a Photography ā£
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
ojovivo
NASA
official daine visual archive
Not today Justin
Fai_Ryy
will byers stan first human second
Cosimo Galluzzi
art blog(derogatory)
we're not kids anymore.
seen from United States
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seen from United States
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seen from Czechia
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@dystopian-ranger
I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO UNMUTE,
Captions:
Gaston: "Everyone knows her father's a lunatic. He was in there tonight, raving-"
Fast placed music plays as the scene changes.
Gaston: "Whoa! Slow down Maurice."

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in which murderbot is a very normal terracotta soldier and ART the dragon spirit of a chinese junk who dwells in the ship's keel. they meet in the ming dynasty perhaps, when ppl are sailing places extra willy-nilly.
*Nüwa is the mother goddess in chinese mythology, known for creating humanity from yellow clay and repairing the sky.
thank you @mutualrapport for hosting the event! original prompt below.
[drawn for the prompt: an AU of ART and MB's first meeting and conversation - e.g. another look at their first meeting from a fantasy, historical, or (non-canon) sci-fi lens! Any perspective is fine. The only constraint is that it cannot be set in the canon universe. Any visibly non-canon AU- fantasy, human, historical, etc. - anything goes!]
I finished the last constellation tonight. All 40 of them are now done! Went through and double checked and every stitch is in place for them and all the beads are in place. Which just leaves the milky way part to do.
Started stitching the Milky Way in. Slowly making progress on it as I am hiding the travelling thread so the back will look nice.
Looks pretty cool and keeps the readability of the other stitches. Very happy with it. Just a thousand or so to do. As they are in a grid roughly every centimetre apart.
Update on the constellation quilt. I have gotten the last Milky Way stitch done now. Which means the quilting part of this project is done. My next step will be to baste the edges down, remove the pattern, trim the quilt square, and lastly attach the binding.
Progress on the constellation quilt has come along quite a lot now. Finished the binding on the quilt over the weekend. I prefer to machine stitch the binding to the front then hand stitch the back side. It gives such a nice finish to the quilt. Took the time to measure it also and it ended up being 72" by 72" (183cm by 183cm).
With that done I could finally start removing the pattern. Which is taking both less time and more time that I thought it would. As it rips really easily so that goes fast, but the tiny corners and removing it under the beads is slow. You can now see the difference in the glow effect with it against the dark front of the quilt instead of the pattern.
Behold the stars of the constellations of the northern sky! I love how this quilt has turned out. It was a lot of fun to work on and the effect is so cool in person. Overall I would estimate it took about 90-100 hours to complete. Give or take 10 hours if you want to count the time I spent custom dying the fabric.
I made sure to get a nice photo of it in daylight. For once I also remembered to get a quilt label on it. The back really shows the difference in readability of the quilting on the ice dyed fabric compared to the solid front. Thank you everyone that has followed this. I am glad you all found joy in it.
Those that are interested, here is the pattern I used by Haptic Lab. I made the large northern hemisphere version, and plan to make the matching southern hemisphere one next year. I also got your back for the less crafty people. Haptic Lab sells finished quilts in this pattern, both as a large quilt and a small one.
run
i think i found my new favorite artist on twitter
(source)
š me

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š„
crack egg directly into hot pan, scramble while cooking
crack egg directly into cold pan, stir/scramble, then cook
crack egg into bowl, whisk or stir, THEN pour into pan and cook
other
results
Or you use a plastic/silicon spatula?? Or a silicon whisk?? go to literally any dollar store they have shitty plastic/silicon kitchen utensils you can scramble eggs with without scratching up your pans
Now thatās what I call
@rpepperpotshipssciencebros please forgive me for this one
I hate this site so much.
A misunderstanding
The last time I saw Earth.
raidcore
Once on IMDB I saw a āgoofā which was that during a scene set in India(?), the light flicker was at the wrong frequency (in hertz). I wish I knew what movie it was to show you guys, I want to say it was some Marvel shit.
I always wondered how this person knew that. Was there an amazing Indian electrician who just instinctively felt the flicker rate was off? Did they go frame by frame and count the flickers per second?
I wanna say that was Tenet?
It was The Bourne SupremacyĀ @garbage-empressā
holy fuck
*punching propane tank in a video game*
āno way! I fill these for a living.ā
I will always be in love with highly specialized incredibly niche knowledge. Humans are beautiful
My favorite āhumans are space orcsā idea is that trope where aliens kidnap some humans for their zoo, except it ends up like Jurassic Park. And the poor Alien Humanologists who were invited to the park are like:
āYou mean you locked up a pack of curious, highly competitive persistence predators with NO enrichment in the enclosure? You FOOLS! If you had bothered to throw a basketball or half a box of Legos in there, KE-X9 would still be alive!
āWell of course they climbed the retaining wall! Did you think to study their evolutionary lineage AT ALL?ā
The humans would find a way to use the basketball and legos to escape. I mean one time a guy somehow escaped from a prison in Mexico without breaking any laws so his escape would be legal so honestly given enough time the Jurassic park situation is inevitable.
Jurassic Park would be awesome, but now that I think about it I also kind of love love the idea of humans as the alien zoo equivalent of those octopuses that climb out of their tanks and wander around taste-testing other exhibits or throwing sub-par shrimp at handlers.Ā
Like theyāre totally unable to figure out whatās happening because the cameras keep going out, but every night things get moved, or stolen, exhibits are disappearing, WHAT IS GOING ON, theyāve moved facilities twice and itās still happening, are they haunted, are the ancestors angry, WHAT IS HAPPENING!?
And then a weary humanologist is allĀ ā⦠your humans are getting outā.Ā
āThat is impossible.āĀ
āTheyāre getting out.āĀ
āThat enclosure is COMPLETELY SECURE.āĀ
āAnd yet somehow theyāre getting out.āĀ
āTHE HUMANS ARE NOT GETTING OUT.āĀ
āOh yeah? I bet you twenty glarks theyāre getting out. Stay after closing time with me and Iāll show you.āĀ
*next day*
ā⦠the humans were getting out.āĀ
ā⦠why did they keep going back in, then?!ā
(In a deeply embarrassed mumble) āThey said they werenāt going to escape until they finished their behavioural experiments. Uh. On us.ā
two things come to mind:
1 - at our own zoos the MOST notorious jail breakers are the orangutans, who exploit all manner of methods, including literal lock picking. One orangutan, Ken Allen escaped several times WHILE THE ZOO WAS OPEN TO THE PUBLIC without getting caught by watching Zoo employees, even when they tried to disguise themselves as tourists to catch him at it. While he was being āsecretlyā surveilled, he managed to escape AND show the other orangutans how to escape. They finally found out he was doing some thought-to-be-impossible rock climbing to escape. To fix it, they brought in a team of human rock-climbers to locate all possible methods of climbing out. So. Humans would absolutely be the worst to try to keep contained. Like,Ā āescape roomsā are currently seen as a fun date idea. Iām sayin.
2 - animals that escape most often return to their ownĀ enclosure (after all thatās where their beds and dinners are, and if the zoo is any good it is the place best suited to their species-specific needs for miles and miles) after they have had sufficient excitement. Ken Allen the orangutan would escape and wander around the zoo looking at the animals like heād bought a ticket. So if the keepers were nice, and formed a bond, and the set up was comfy, once the human knew they could get out if they really wanted, theyād probably go back, depending on how uncomfortable/dangerous the alien environment was.
I mean if they were raised in captivity. Wild-caught humans, all bets are off; depending on age of capture a return home could be a full blown obsession, the sabotage of engineering from mechanisms up to entire facilities is a strong possibility, and they may go on a murder spree with improvised or stolen weapons if desperate.
Humans consider an Escape Room to be a Fun Courtship Ritual
The wild humans thing does depend a LOT on how good the zoo is, IMO. If you, as the alien zookeeper:
āRescuedā humans who werenāt thriving in the wild. (Aka dire medical debt.)
Made sure to take an entire social troop instead of lone individuals. (Your closest friends/family members are there.)
Offered VERY good care and enrichment.
Then I think youād have at least a PARTIAL chance of your wild humans proving to themselves that they can escape and immediately going, āOkay but the zoo is obviously better.ā

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now that we have successfully nitpicked the difference between poisonous and venomous it is time we nitpicked the difference between parasite and parasitoid
[scribbling in a notebook] Theā¦xenomorphā¦is anā¦example ofā¦a parasitoidā¦organism.
yes
that being said landlords are parasitoids
Every time Sean Astin makes a statement on whether or not Sam and Frodo were indeed gay for each other in lord of the rings heās always like āwell we have to acknowledge that attitudes around sexuality have changed dramatically over the past several decades and since authorial intent is only up to speculation, the story is open to multiple readings, some of which might have different significances for different groups of people also they kiss on the lips because I said soā
at the rose city comic con panel this month a fan asked them (sean and elijah) if sam and frodo were in love and they said
Sean: .....yes. absolutely
Elijah: 100 percent.
Sean: dont tell rosie
Rosie: "This is my husband Sam, and that's his husband, Frodo. Frodo is my husband-in-law. I'm not into him, he's he's a bit too 'elfy' for my taste, but Sam likes him, and that's fine with me. As far as I know, Frodo can't give Sam children, but Frodo looks after ours all the same, so I don't mind sharing Sam if it means another pair of eyes on the wee ones. In all honesty, our family tree is right simple compared to some hobbits. Yes, I'm referrin' to you Lobelia, over there pretendin' you ain't eavesdroppin'. Still bitter you ain't got either of my boys or their house, eh?"
Tbh it's canon that Frodo invited Sam and Rosie to move in to Bag End after their wedding and they all lived there for a couple of years until Frodo went to Valinor, so yeah. Running with it.
And once Rosie dies, Sam says his goodbyes and disappears after him.
whatās funny is people assuming that rosie would somehow be too dim or naive to KNOW that sam loved frodo, instead of looking at a guy who would loyally follow a beloved friend to hell and then help carry him home again, and not be like āoh i canāt not fuck that.ā
Polyamory, specifically polyandry, would be an interesting solution to the oddball population of the Shire.
The Shire is excellent farming country, with consistently good weather, and only one tough winter in living memory; hobbits like to produce large families; theyāre resistant to disease, rarely violent, and encounter few dangers. It is usual for hobbits to produce many children, so that (for example) Bilbo and Frodo are unusual in both being only children, with no siblings, and not having children of their own. All of this should point to a population that increases every generation if not doubling outright. Young people (and their ideologies!) should rapidly outnumber the old with an ever-increasing effect and impact on society. However, the Shire has a surprisingly stable history; it never seems to increase or decrease greatly in population, and the bell curve of age seems⦠demographically balanced? There certainly isnāt a conflict from rising young bloods challenging the middle-aged reactionaries; thereās no unemployment; there are no housing crises or waves of emigration, or even a tendency for young people leaving home to marry. Meanwhile, not only does the Shire not suffer from internal pressures, but it remains obscure and hardly noticed in global politics.
What makes sense here is that adult hobbits form a loose group. Four parents in a polycule, between them all, may produce four children. All four parents claim to have four children. An outsider would assume this meant the adults had eight children.
Hobbits therefore are not especially fertile or fecund. They simply have large families. Much of their interest in genealogy is due to the complex relationships of blood-kin, hearth-kin, love-kin and pledge-kin, who must all be carefully tracked and measured - not just because you need to make sure that you donāt climb into bed with an un-permitted degree of blood-kin, but to track family alliances and carefully quantify the precise level of thoughtfulness to put into the proper present to gift your fatherās loverās lover (too much implies a degree of intimacy that might upset the polycule.)
Thus, while a hobbit matron may tell a startled dwarf that she has seven sons, she might only have borne five of them herself, and have one hearth-son by her wife, and a pledge-son of her first husbandās. There are between three and four fathers involved at various stages of production, from conception to pledge-duty, but there is debate about the precise number of fathers, as one child was festival-conceived and therefore provisionally pledged to the Brandybucks until more distinctive paternal traits should materialise. Itās expected that four of the sons will be uninterested in women, and their contribution to family life will be in raising hearth-children and pledge-duty. However, this level of detail is normally negotiated later in conversation, as a mutual overture of friendship. So sheās just clear and simple: yes, certainly, she has seven sons. Yes, theyāre all hers. Yes, thatās fairly normal - yes, hobbits like big families. How big? Thatās really hard to say! Well, about thirteen hobbits live in her house⦠er, she has forty-three nieces and nephews. Yes! She has nine siblings, thatās correct, but some of them are still babies themselves..
In this way, a bewildered dwarf might assume that hobbits are absurdly fertile, producing an average of seven children per couple, at an absurd pace.
When in fact, with about half of hobbits never bearing biological children, the population of hobbits is pretty much always the same.
Tl:dr, hobbit population works perfectly well, both internally and in the perceptions of outsiders, if the majority of the Shire is gay, theyāre all polyamorous, and they all firmly claim to be parents of high numbers of children. Of course Frodo fathered Samās kids - he named them! They were pledge-kin but not hearth-kin, as Frodo needed a lot of quiet and stability in the home.
No outsider ever parses hobbit genealogy well enough to understand this except for Gandalf, who never explains anything either.
are you kidding? Gandalf would WEAPONIZE his knowledge of Hobbit genealogy against outsiders
Since āpledgeā kinships are multidimensional and can occur in different directions, hobbits can form - and formalise - family bonds simply because they choose to. Gandalf doesnāt tell anyone that the formation of Thorinās Company, the Fellowship of the Ring, and Belladonna Tookās Accidental Troop of Mercenaries* are legal formations of pledge-siblings, a hobbit family structure usually claimed to increase social class and prestige (as high numbers of pledge-kin confer distinction on a hobbit, being a sort of popularity vote/endorsement that adds greatly to their social power. Incidentally, this is partly why Bilbo was both controversial and successful in his pledge-claim of Frodo; outsiders mistook his ābachelorā status as someone living outside of heteronormativity, while the Shire was bewildered and increasingly annoyed by his rejection of pledge and hearth commitments. By rights Bilbo had too few pledge-kin, and too little parenting experience, to claim rights to an orphan, especially one from Brandybuck hearth; but conversely, his social status was high enough that his belated bid for his very first pledge-son couldnāt reasonably be denied by anybody.)
In short, all of the hobbits enjoyed achieving even larger families on their adventures, legally and without argument or debate. Itās free real estate. If nobody else is going to sibling these losers, we will. (The condensation of so many entanglements at once also legally made Pippin his own father-in-law.)
Gandalf never explained.
* see the post about the Old Tookās āenchanted diamond cufflinksā that obeyed the wearerās commands; which were probably, given the general state of things, two lost silmarils recovered by his Remarkable Daughters and gifted to him because things stay small and safe in the shire
@elodieunderglass wouldn't that make pippin both denethor's pledge-son-in-law, and (as pledge-brother to the king) probably outrank him?
Only through Boromir while Boromir was alive! Pippinās familial claim through Boromir technically dissolved on Boromirās death, as Denethor hadnāt been privy to it, and those bonds rarely stretch to a stranger when the person in the middle has died before introducing them; although Pippin, who was well-brought-up, perfectly and politely rectified the problem at once by simply swearing himself as Denethorās pledge-son. but through his blood-cousinship to Frodo, who was older than Boromir, his status as the Took double-primarc (donāt ask) and the proximity-enhanced status-doubling effects of having a five-way cousin in Merry, Pippin was demonstrably higher status as a pledge-sibling and was also his own father-in-law and approved of himself. As such, he would have significantly raised Boromirās social status and marital prospects in the Shire.
Inheritance follows parent-child pledge as the primary consideration, with matrilineal descent as the secondary. Pippin would have been bewildered to gradually understand that Denethor held his two sons in such odd and different standing :-/ hobbits donāt recognise kingship so it wouldāve been very upsetting and disappointing to Pippin to understand how Denethor stood in position of sworn-father to a whole city of people without even being slightly fair to his younger hearth-son. Aragorn is demonstrably much better dad-material and therefore had Pippinās vote. Pippin, by virtue of being an excellent father-in-law to a spectacularly promising young son-in-law, also considered himself a better candidate for king of Gondor than Denethor, by outranking him in Dad Competence - but was too busy by the time he realized this to point this out .
Ironically, the events in which Pippin realized this made Faramir his own hearth-son - so Pippin won in the end and took a great interest in ceremonially approving of Eowyn. Gandalf never explained
I will buy that for a dollar, yup.
It crossed my dash again! The Hobbit Polyamory Post!
I'm sorry.???
@acarefreewind
Okey
EXCUSE ME THERE IS A PLANT THAT CAN MIMIC FAKE PLANTS?????
IT'S CALLED A BOQUILA TRIOFOLIOLATA AND IT'S FUCKING WITH MY BRAIN
IT APPARENTLY CAN MIMIC OTHER PLANTS AND AT FIRST I WAS LIKE "oh cool man it must take it's genetic code and copy it or feel the roots or something like that!! :3"
AND THEN I READ AN ARTICLE ON IT AND THESE FUCKING PARAGRAPHS HIT ME LIKE A BUS
LIKE READ THIS SHIT
WHAT THE FUCK MOTHER NATURE
I went to find the article. It's fascinating.
In retrospect, consider the number 1 thing every grade-schooler knows about plants is they take in light, the idea they might be able to see should not wreck my shit as hard as it does
the world is counting on you
[ID: An illustration of Ryland Grace from the Project Hail Mary film adaptation. Heās in side view, wearing the mustard-yellow overall, looking at a glowing crocheted earth hovering over his hand. A warm light shines over him. Behind him is the Hail Mary spacecraft. The background is outer space, filled with stars. END ID]

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what feels distinct to me about Terry Pratchett work is even though heās a comedy writer and heās more or less poking fun at things all the time, he also knows how to let his characters be sincere and to respect their emotions when the story requires that
like, oftentimes he shies away from writing big dramatic emotion and tends to pull back instead, but you donāt get the sense that the character isnāt allowed to feel it, but rather that the narrative voice is, idk, giving them privacy
i often donāt enjoy comedy writing because itās hard for me to envision the characters having fully-fleshed-out relationships and emotions apart from the jokes and the humorous antagonism, because itās not presented as happening on page without there being a punchline attached, but I donāt feel that way about Discworld
PTerry was a master at pacing and timing, for both comedy and drama. Because a story canāt be good if itās all action, all the time. There needs to be quieter bits for it to work.
Itās not a Discworld joke unless you read it, donāt parse it as a joke, and then carry on with your life for ten years until someone stops you to say something like āItās a pavlovian response because the dog ate a pavlovaā and you scream Terryās name with enough indignant rage you hope it rattles the pillars of the multiverse so wherever his soul is heāll hear it.
#i donāt think this is what pterry meant by āa manās not dead while his name is still spokenā
I absolutely think it is
I read Jingo for the first time when I was 13.
Iām 33 now, and I still discover a new joke every time I reread it.
Terry was a comedic genius
#shoutout to the one in Soul Music about the leopard that got thrown out of the circus because it couldn't hear the ringmaster#it was several months after my second or third time reading the book that I clocked it was a Deaf LeopardĀ (via @morkaischosen)
god DAMMIT
When I was informed that āVetinariā is a pun on āMediciā. That pun was so painful I couldnāt even see it.
...are you FUCKING KIDDING ME.
*starts thunderously knocking on the doors of heaven*
get out here Terry I just wanna talk
Twurpās Peerage made me throw a book (gently) at a wall.
In the UK, the book of the peerage is called Burkeās Peerage. Burke sounds like berk, which means a silly/annoying person. So Terry tookĀ ātwerpā, another word for a silly or annoying person, and replaced the e with u.Ā
The Book of Silly and Annoying People, based on the real thing with a pun on the name thrown in for good measure.
OMG I FUCKING *KNEW* VETINARI WAS A JOKE ON FUCKONG SOMETHING I JUST COULDNT GRASP IT. I THOUGHT IT WAS A REFERENCE TO WIND SOMEHOW
I am not a talented punster so I was today old when I realised about Vetinari.
guys it's fucking close to water
Latinclass ca. 9th grade: the text we had to translate contained the words trans means "on the other side of" or in german it can be translated to "über/ hinüber". Also silvas; silvanis means "the forest" or in german "der Wald".
Trans silvas very simply translated into german would be über den Wald
Trans silvas -> Transsilvanien -> Ćberwald
My latin teacher gave me a very weird look as I suddenly facepalmed myself and groaned quietly.
The Venturi and Selachii feud is what killed me when I got it.
The Venturi Effect is a scientific term referring to the acceleration of a liquid through a narrow tube (like a jet).
Selachii is a classification of sharks. (I discovered this when my stepson got really into sharks)
... fucking HELL Terry.
In Carpe Jugulum, Count Magpyr boasts of having helped write the Malleus Maleficarum, along with the Torquus Simiae Maleficarum, the Auriga Clavium Maleficarum, and in fact the entire Arca Instrumentorum.
The Malleus Maleficarum is a very real, very nasty and absolutely batshit insane book from late 15th-century Germany, basically laying out the procedure for catching, torturing, and executing witches. Its title translates to The Hammer of Witches. The other titles are Pratchett's inventions.
Malleus = "hammer" Torquus Simiae = "monkey wrench" Auriga Clavium = "bucket of nails" Arca Instrumentorum = "box of tools"