i’m here but once to the marrow of my bones

he transformed... magical pot...

@randomitemdrop

Item: Urn of Cat Transmogrification; a cat placed into the urn will come out a different color

Domming a guy i hate and convincing him good puppies like to be named Hubert then getting his name legally changed to Hubert then ghosting him

image description: tag screenshot reading #i wish i could draw the face i made whilst reading this and add it in the tags like an emoji #the existing emojis just aren't specific enough /end description

Several years ago I saw this post on here that was originally the OP talking about Simon and Garfunkel and said “it’s so funny how Simon is like the name of a normal dude and Garfunkel is like the name of a little goblin man” and it became really good commentary on antisemitism and the fact that these two Jewish men, in this context, represent the erasure of assimilation versus the dehumanization of stereotypes. I can’t find that post but I think about it a lot.

remember when linguini brought a rat he found back to his apartment and got all embarrassed and was like it’s not much. to the rat

FYI if anything I say is contradictory it's cause I have like 8 different opinions at once and I actually have no idea what's going on

jf i was vladimir nabokov and i was writing lolita i would make her an adult becaude then it would t be dark problematic media and instead a sweet romabce between two adults (woke and pure)

*puts my cigarettes out on you*

*wuickly smokes it all before you can reach me*

oh a wise guy huh? *rolls up my sleeves* why I oughta…

*wuickly rolls your sleeves back down before you can hit me*

good news. the things that used to upset me no longer upset me. bad news. i'm creating an army of bugs to hurt innocent bystanders

My pie in the sky goal for learning Chinese is to read a classic poem in the original language and actually understand why it is beautiful. My croissant high above sea level goal is to read a paragraph of the trashiest pulp their literary tradition can offer me and actually understand why it’s stupid as hell (complimentary).

I keep reading English translations of classic Chinese poetry where the poems are introduced by a tremendously sincere translator saying something like, “the exquisite verse of [Poet] has endured through centuries for reasons self-evident to any who read it,” and then I’ll read it and unfortunately. the reasons are rarely self-evident.