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@theartofmadeline

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One Nice Bug Per Day

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Show & Tell
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#extradirty
Color Me Curious
Not today Justin
Monterey Bay Aquarium
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almost home

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@lieutenant-sarcastic

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TRAGEDY: every member of a once-flourishing group chat is now employed
real question i just had to answer for my top surgery screening
everyone seems to be doing quite well

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"going out to get milk" is a common turn of phrase used to describe a man abandoning his family.
the "milkman" is a common figure in stories depicting a woman's infidelity and adulterous affair.
this implies that the ability to provide milk would both decrease the likelihood of a man abandoning his wife and children, as it would eliminate the need for leaving to get milk AND would secure that man's marriage, as his wife would have no need to seek milk from an extraneous source.
therefore, all men should produce milk, through various means such as:
- being a cow
- being an almond
- being a woman
- being a coconut
- being in the omegaverse
- being an oat
(list is exemplary and not finite)
in this essay, i will redefine the nuclear family and explain the seductive and inflammatory nature of the 1993 "Got Milk?" commercials.
you shut your mouth.
I’ve read the huger games recentlyyyy
my cat is fucking UP the dsm5 like her hungry ass
HAPPY BRUSHBUG DAY TO ALL WHO CELEBRATE
Oh nooo I hadn’t noticed that my cat’s automatic feeder was getting low on food so as usual she dashed off when she heard the machine start but I couldn’t hear the usual sound of her food falling into the bowl so I went to look and my poor cat was just. Sitting there. Staring at her empty food bowl. Then for a second she glanced up at me then right back to her bowl with the biggest, saddest, most bewildered eyes you could ever imagine on such a small creature. I filled her bowl and the machine right away ofc but I still feel a little guilty 😭
Quick artist’s rendition
HOW did this get this many notes in less than 24 hours?????
Also, in case anyone was worried, rest assured mim the local void is missing no meals

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does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person
wow
"And he gave it to me for free, Bob!"
I saw this on bsky last night and had to draw the guy
Hey. Don’t cry. Baby black-footed cat at the cameron park zoo, okay. his name is maverick he’s about a month old and he just hit one (1) pound
look at the excitement in his body language
Genuinely lost my mind watching episode 15

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Why do kiwis have such massive fucking eggs “it’s because they are related to ostriches and-“ yeah ok but like why didn’t they evolve smaller eggs if I was in charge I would do that shit pronto. Thoughts?
their big eggs are actually that size for a similar reason to human babies having massive heads!! being bigger at birth can be important.
kiwi are trying SO HARD to become mammals. fur-like feathers, whisker-like feathers, little beady eyes, nocturnal, great sense of smell.... that's basically a mammal!! they're well suited for life on the forest floor.
their big eggs work alongside these adaptations to give them a leg up in the bird world. their young hatch already feathered! they're precocial, which means they're born with the ability to open their eyes and move around. like foals.
big egg = more powerful offspring from the get-go. babies don't need to spend precious time vulnerable while they develop on the ground when they've already done all that in the egg!
(unfortunately, with the introduction of mammals to aotearoa, these adaptations are a little less useful...)
Important addition: baby kiwi come out of the egg looking like they've come out of a shower with a hangover
They look like one of the downsides of emerging from an egg fully formed is how aware you are off just having come out on egg. First minute alive, already dealing with some fucking experience.