🎼

my best friend linen my brother in arms cotton my partner wool my beautiful sister silk

our sick deranged enemy polyester....

the demon lord, prince of lies, "Vegan Leather"...

But is it ska?

the "came back wrong" trope except like... they didnt. like this mad scientists wife died, and so he studied necromancy, brought her back, and she came back and it all worked. like she came back exactly the same as she was before with literally no difference. but the scientist guy is like "oh no... what have i done.... shes Different now!!!! she came back Wrong!!!!" and shes just like. chilling. reading a book. cooking dinner. shes just so so normal but in the guys mind hes like "oh shes soooo weird" but shes just normal

NO its a JOKE and YOU DONT GET IT. ITS NOT THAT DEEP

While she was dead he put his memory of her on such a high pedestal that she could never live up to it alive

alternatively‚ she came back perfectly fine but he thinks she came back wrong‚ because the tragic reality is that he never actually knew his wife

im going INSANE thats MY POST.

It's your post but the journey to posting it changed it to such a degree that even its closest intimacies are now foreign to you. Sorry dude.

ppl are so annoying “you can’t paint ur bedroom pink you’re an adult” i did not spend my entire life waiting to grow up and control my life to paint my bedroom beige

This applies to other adulting activities, too. When I was a kid, I decided that I wanted to have a wedding cake made of doughnuts. When I got older, I figured that I would be “mature” about it and get a traditional cake, which the older adults approved of. Now that I’m 25 and facing the possibility of actual marriage in the near future, I’m just like “marriage is a social construct but it comes with tax & insurance benefits, so just give me that goddamn doughnut cake.” If they don’t like it then they don’t have to come to my wedding.

GROWING UP DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAVE TO ABANDON WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY.

I think a lot of it stems from the ubiquitous Waterhouse prints that were sold on college campuses for 20 years. like why would I get a free pass if it were Monet instead Western culture is stupid. The entire point of being an adult is breakfast for dinner and cake for breakfast and dying with the most toys.

instantly decided to reblog when i got to GROWING UP DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAVE TO ABANDON WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY.

A lot of people’s idea of “California” is just Los Angeles and also I think specifically the rich parts of Los Angeles

As a European, my idea of “California” is honestly just. Warm America. With beach? I think?

There’s cold rainforests and snowy mountains there

I like to refer to California as "West Iowa" since that's the description that is likely to be counterintuitive or irritating to the largest number of people. And it's at least as accurate as any other single description—flat croplands are, at least, more representative of the state as a whole than LA is.

As someone from a conservative agriculture heavy part of the state I find that description to be hilariously accurate.

As someone who grew up in a similarly conservative and agriculture heavy part of the state, but also where a bunch of mountains are, that description has succeeded in it's goal of irritating me because Iowa has zero mountains in the whole state. It's as flat as a flipping pancake and I miss granite.

I just saw a video title on YouTube that said something like “Why is glass transparent?” And that’s an interesting question and I’m sure it’s great that the video exists but my first thought was like “Because glass is terrible, obviously.” Because it’s unwieldy and let’s out warmth and needs to be heated to hundreds of degrees to be shaped and turns into hundreds of tiny daggers if you drop it. Why the hell would we bother with that if it didn’t have some magical quality like being totally transparent despite being solid? Glass is transparent because if it weren’t, we’d use something else.

looking through my “me” tag and this is apparently what I was thinking 3 years ago

this is amazing and I’m really glad I reblogged that old bullshit post because I got to learn this

None of these are poisonous to drink from or meaningfully radioactive, btw, but they will leech heavy metals into things stored in them the way that leaded crystal will.

Coca Cola flavored Oreos taste like if you could eat clipart

I think they add an important element of randomness to the environment. My father in law bought 6 or 7 boxes of the Selena Gomez Oreos so he could set a Selena Gomez Oreo alarm to go off mid workday and then say to his coworkers, "Oh, my Selena Gomez Oreo alarm is going off!" and unearth from his locker his 6 or 7 boxes of Selena Gomez Oreos so he and his coworkers could distribute them around the neonatal ICU ward where they work. He said it livened up an otherwise extremely dreary day.

As someone who works in an arts and crafts store, I have sold SO MUCH resin to people who are using the celebrity-themed ones to make jewelry

Wait are they using the packaging or are they trying to freeze an Oreo in carbonite

a youtuber called louis rossman asked people to help him spread a sort of movement to show just how annoyed people are with the increasingly downward trend of technology becoming less focused on being useful technology and more as ways to make money or steal data by swapping their pfp to clippy, a free program that while annoying was a genuine attempt at something useful and benevolent

This is why clippy is here then

Fun fact: Cheetahs only attack prey that runs

jesus that is good to know.

Yup, that’s the point you just stay still and let it do whatever the fuck it wants that doesn’t involved you getting eaten. 

Another Fun Fact: Cheetahs are incredibly nervous animals. One of the (many) reason’s they’re going extinct is that cheetahs are so sensitive and nervous, some of them are literally too nervous to breed. Others will breed, but stress themselves out so much, they’ll lose their cubs. So zoos with breeding programs had to figure out how to make cheetahs comfortable enough to first of all, get laid and secondly - not spazz themselves into miscarrying. So what’d they do? They gave the cheetah’s their very own Service Dogs! The dogs make them feel safe, protected and secure!

AJHHHHFDDGHH SO PRECIOUS

this post just got so much better

THIS IS OFFICIALLY MY FAVOURITE POST

so THATS why these cheetah ft dogo pics exist

the anxiety cat

Also! Cheetahs are not in fact classified as big cats, they are simply very large lesser cats, due to the fact that they purr, meow, chirp, and cannot roar. Also many cheetahs have learned to recognize wildlife photographers are friends and not foes, so they will just come up to people and be friendly occasionally as pictured at the top of the chain. Some will even leave their Cubs with photographers to look after while they hunt. So. Yeah. Cheetahs are great

In love with this random guy who had a lock slapped on his storage unit for not paying its rental and not only did he ignore management and took his stuff out without paying, but also chose to steal the lock itself and send it to the LockPickingLawyer along with a confession letter

@theoutcastrogue

People always focus on the "lockpicking" part of his name and ignore that the lockpicking lawyer is, indeed, a lawyer, and can tell you exactly which crimes you committed in getting this lock to him

if you ever find yourself thinking “wow I scraped the bottom of the barrel with my energy with that and came out okay!” that’s the devil talking. you did not come out okay. you borrowed energy from the future. you will repay it if you don’t rest and replenish the borrowed energy first.

this one took off quickly - are you guys ok

WIZARD PSA: Chronomancy might be weird and confusing, but one of the few solid rules of the discipline is keep your promises. Time is a library, and you don't want to meet the librarian.

Reblog if you have met the librarian