It doesn't LOOK smart

i love declining birth rates 🥰 "what a horrible problem! society will collapse!" oopsie it looks like you're gonna have to make having children worth it 😊 teehee you're gonna have to improve society in order to fix this problem, or it will all collapse. oh noooooo. how horrible. :3c

the funniest and most tragic moment in steven universe is the scene that implies that Pearl pulls bitches like a professional dog walker but doesn't know how phones work so her place on earth is being a life-changing futch fling for every dyke on the east coast there's probably a gay bar in maryland where they talk about the twiggy bird chick that eats milf pussy like it's the last edible thing on earth and they dont even know about the city full of thousand year old neon lesbian amazons who are pent up 24/7 from The War and leaving room for jesus cause they're always hanging out with their softboy nephew who might be the second coming of christ

In a single sentence, no less.

hikes are very good yes but a deluxe hike is when you are a accompanied by a freak with niche nature knowledge. they’re like omg stop there’s a horned valerian varmint beetle here and then you both get to crouch down and look at a bug like :)

not to be a dirty commie or anything but i don't think any one person should have enough money to solve world hunger and then get to decide not to

his wife has filled THEIR house with ANTIQUES. to AVOID DAMAGING HER VALUABLES i fuck him on the floor

#feminist retelling

I told my mom like 7 years ago that I had a tumblr blog and she's like can you monetize that and I'm like no and she's still to this day like can you monetize your blog and I don't know how to explain that this isn't A Blog this is unmonetizable rpf shitposting to gay bitches online

I think instrumence should be free for those who are pure of heart

u should be able to put ur hand down and let the instrument sniff u and if it smells a beautiful quality in ur heart and spirit that's ur instrument now. stray tumpet follow you home.. bwaa

People not liking the "cat distribution system" trend because "what if they are just outdoor cats" to me is like. Okay maybe you shouldn't have left your cat outdoors 🤷‍♂️

i must say, i am a huge fan of when a book is in the middle of a very exciting plot containing many interesting problems when out of nowhere for a few pages it's like, "hey by the way, real quick, here's a detailed explanation of the city's water filtration system! i'm telling you this for a reason and you should worry about it. anyway! haha okay back to the plot" and you just get to be Scared for a while

the one negative impact of Project Hail Mary is that gay people on tumblr don’t think of Ryan Gosling as the guy from “hey girl I mean they” anymore

i need to get off tumblr i’m at the aquarium admiring the fish and my brain goes “posts that make you want to get in the water” what are you talking about. these are live fish in the room with you. what post.