shit posts

job interviewer: would you be willing to destroy and betray yourself for nothing?

people foolishly dismiss desserts and treats as having no nutritional value when they actually are necessary for refilling your sanity stat. to prove my point please observe the emotional stability of the next person you meet who doesnt let themselves ever eat any form of dessert

i'm winning the idgaf war [remembers idgaf] i mean who gives a shit how the idgaf war is going. i wasn't even aware there was a war.

joining the idgaf war on the side of who cares

The most beautiful phrase in the whole entire world. Is. What are they gonna do. Fire me?

still thinking about when i saw a girl on here with ~3 partners and one of them was a lesbian with a “MEN DNI” banner and one of them was a tboy with a “‘MEN DNI’ DNI” banner

has anyone noticed that after the porn ban of 2018 tumblr was essentially killed from the mainstream and everyone flocked to other social media sites like twitter and meta. then those sites got enshittified to where twitter became Nazi Central and meta sites had an entire meme around getting “zucced” aka mark zuckerberg himself would ban you for saying a no-no word like fuck. and then the mainstream shifted to tiktok where infamous toddlerspeak sentences like “he got unalived by a pew pew” were born because if you once again say a no-no word like kill or gun or any other word that isn’t corporate i mean kid friendly then the algorithm will bury your post into the ground. and somehow we’ve come full circle and tumblr is now the most bearable social media site because although we can’t have female presenting nipples we can at least talk to each other like adults. has anyone noticed that at all or is it just me and the flaming skull

the sewing machine is like if a horse and an inkjet printer had a child

im being so serious when i say this but we need to bring back the "my genitals are none of your business" "if gender is whats in my pants then my gender is some loose change" mentality from the late 2010's because too many people on here are openly flirting with exclusionary people who spout enbyphobic rhetoric. stop caring about what people's agabs are you assholes. they literally mean nothing. they're not a zodiac sign or indicative of people's character. you are not wholly pure or wholly evil because of your assigned sex. you're just a person.

"what genitals do you have?" Is sexual harassment regardless if its from a security guard or a chronically online furry

wheres that post that said shane hollander would be mentioned by name in a drake song

(yuna hollander on voicemail) hey sweetie its mom. sorry i missed you. though its 8:30 and you should be home by now. anyways give me a call back when you can. theres this guy Drake that just mentioned you in his new song. seems like a pretty big deal, canadian too. just take a listen to it when you get a chance. nothing bad. i actually think it could be quite good for your image. im trying to get in touch with his manager to see if he’ll let you be in the music video. unless youd rather send a cease and desist in which case i’ve got patty on speed dial if thats the route youd rather go. your father says hi. anyways, love you. call me back. bye.

Chappell Roan was right. it is like a hundred ninety nine degrees

And no one is even doing it with me

*sighs sadly* doing it with me…

The older i get the more i understand why some people become obsessed with privacy, not because they’re hiding something, but because being constantly perceived starts to feel spiritually exhausting.

my consistent top 5 tumblr fear is that i make a pro piracy post and then it gets reblogged with some first world addition about the wonders of the library

Everyone loves to talk about carcinization but nobody talks about how unrelated clades of plants repeatedly evolve into trees.