When people fake orgasm or other sexual responses, it still gives partners those cues. It just gives them wrong cues. It tells partners you respond to something in a way that you don’t, like something to a degree that’s not real, and if they don’t know you’re faking, and you also don’t talk about what’s really going on, they’re going to tend to keep doing whatever brought about those responses because they, since you have effectively told them so or shown them so, think those are the right things to be doing to please you.

In order for your sex life to get better, and in order for you two to actually really get and be intimate sexually, he needs to know that the information you have been giving him has been wrong information. He needs for you to start giving him accurate information about what goes on with you sexually."

It took Haiti over a hundred years to pay that ransom and it's difficult to explain just how badly that fucked up their entire development, especially since France also demanded a 50% discount on everything they bought from Haiti just to make it harder. Like! No wonder they're impoverished!

There is no permanent and safe way to intentionally lose weight. This is true.  

And that means that if you want to truly live a fulfilling and meaningful life, you will need to let go of the fantasy of being thin. You will need to do the difficult self-work needed to unlearn your internalized fat phobia. You may also need to learn how to eat normally without restriction and shame. All of this is difficult. But a lifetime of self-hate, restriction, repeated cycles of weight gains and weight losses, and declining health from the damage caused by under-nourishing your body is far far worse. 

Over fifty years of research conclusively demonstrates that virtually everyone who intentionally loses weight by manipulating their eating and exercise habits will regain the weight they lost within three to five years. And the vast majority will actually regain more weight than they lost. [sources]

In fact, the results of a 10-year study of over 275000 people revealed that the annual odds of a fat person attaining a so-called “normal” weight and maintaining that for five years is approximately 1 in 1000. [source]

Nope. One individual’s experiences do not negate 50 years of scientific research with thousands and thousands of people.

“Just change your *lifestyle* by doing blah blah blah and then anyone can lose weight!”

Nope. Any attempts to intentionally lose weight by manipulating food intake and exercise have the same result. Scientists have tried it all! The result it always the same. Weight regain. 

No. A systematic review of research using the doubly-labeled water method to assess people’s energy needs revealed that healthy adults over age 25 need between 2500 and 3000 kilocalories per day on average. People under the age of 25 need about 500 calories more per day than their adult counterparts. People who are bigger than average (including fat people) also need more energy than average to thrive, as do people who are very physically active. [source] [source] 

“Buuuut the nutrition guidelines say we only need 2000 kilocalories per day!”

I also only really do it once or twice a month so sometimes I do go out in public with hairy legs.

come on man i'm on my lunch break can't you wait???

are we drawing the connection between worker safety and consumer safety & public health yet?

More on the health point:

"US Department of Labor proposes more than $1M fine following worker fatality at New Jersey vegetable processing facility"

Name the chains! At this point in the article it seems like contracting with prisons is the default for meat plants ☹

was it Hillary Clinton who lived in a mansion staffed by prison slaves? somebody please tell me which politician was called out

Rumination is probably the most common type of OCD compulsion, but I rarely see anyone talking about it. I've talked to multiple people diagnosed with OCD who didn't even recognize it as a compulsion.

Basically, if you have OCD you have terrible intrusive thoughts. They can be about anything, but common themes are fear of being a bad person, fear of hurting someone, fear of contamination. etc.

Rumination is when you get stuck in a spiral. Rumination is when you spend hours catastrophizing, overthinking, analyzing, telling yourself it's going to be okay.

I'll say it again:

Rumination is a compulsion.

Rumination is a compulsion, and that means you have to stop doing it.

I did ERP (exposure response prevention) for my OCD with a therapist! For 9 months! And it did help, but the idea didn't really click until I found this website a couple years later.

And Oh My God. It made things make so much more sense, and I was able to pull myself out of an episode even though I wasn't in therapy or on meds at the time.

Genuinely if you have OCD, or even if you suspect you have OCD, I'm begging you to read some of these articles.

Like this was genuinely life changing for me.

Here are some of the ones that were most helpful to me:

Defining Rumination

How to Stop Ruminating

ERP Exercises for Compulsive Rumination