Cedric's Love

Dick: B i have to tell you something and you have to remember i literally cannot lie. Jason's on drugs. i saw him taking drugs you need to punish him. he's on drugs.

Bruce:

Jason from across the cave, THE most irritated they've ever heard him: I TOOK AN IBUPROFEN YOU FUCKIN' JACKASS.

-

Damian: father, usually i am not a snitch because Jason trained that out of me at the league, but i am under truth serum so i feel i have no choice but to let you know that Timothy is neglecting to tell you about injuries he gets on patrol again, despite your interventions. he clearly has no respect for you and this should be addressed.

Bruce, grave: Tim, is this true?

Tim, immensely confused: wha- NO?!

Bruce: Damian is currently unable to lie to me, Tim. please, be honest.

Damian: he even did it tonight, he does it all the time father.

Tim: what the- WHAT FUCKING-

Tim: *pauses*

Tim, incredulous: yOU MEAN THE FUCKING SPLINTER I GOT FOUR HOURS AGO?!?!

Bruce:

Bruce: ok but you didn't deny the no respect thing.

Tim: no comment.

-

Tim, through the coms: B, i've been dosed with truth serum. also Jason's killing again.

the house:

Faking handwriting is easy, especially if you have time to prepare the 'confession'.

Guns are mass-produced and cannot actually be identified beyond a brand if you only have a bullet.

Facial matching via any kind of LLM or probability calculator is very unlikely to be actually viable.

Planting evidence is really fucking easy.

Fake IDs: also easy if you're a cop, because your department already arrested someone who knows where the good IDs get made.

When someone has a really important reason to think something is true ("If I found the shooter, I'l get paid enough to get out of poverty"), your brain will helpfully provide reasons to think it's true.

The above list is actually the majority of 'evidence' the cops have on Mr. Mangione, so...this ain't actually the shooter anyway. Not unless the responding PD has some new luck superpower and should be banned from Vegas.

She will go after young artists like Olivia Rodrigo for merely being inspired by her.

She will send a hateful hoard of fans towards actresses whose roles demanded they make a joke about her in-script.

But now Donald Trump has used her music TWICE on TikTok to promote his own dictatorship (the newest in which he declares the USA is an empire that belongs to him), and Taylor has nothing to say.

This isn’t just cowardice, it’s support. Because we know by now that Taylor does not tolerate her music being used in any capacity that she doesn’t approve of.

If anyone has been on the fence about her recent actions, please let this be your wake-up call. It’s time to leave her behind. Separate yourself from this fascist regime that she’s funneling millions of dollars into, do it once and for all. This woman is complicit with MAGA.

these are not real strawberries. you do not have to, and in fact cannot, eat them. no one with a strawberry allergy will be harmed by looking at them. no migrant workers were exploited in the picking of these strawberries. there were no questionable farming practices or negative environmental impacts from growing or transporting them.

because - and i cannot stress this enough - they are not real strawberries.

if you don't like strawberries, you don't have to look at the paintings. in fact, you can get a map of the museum that lists what works are in what rooms and just. not go in there. if you see one by mistake, you can look away. just keep walking. there's plenty of other stuff to see.

yes, real strawberries can cause real quantifiable harm to real people.

but again. these are not real strawberries.

you may have whatever feelings you like about strawberries, and so can i. you can draw and write about whatever fruit floats your boat, and so can i, even if that happens to be strawberries. and we can hang our art side by side in the same gallery, provided you understand that my strawberries are not about you (and your kumquats are, shocker, not about me) and that - and this is true - neither are real.

and when the fascists break down the doors and grab all the strawberry paintings and heap them in the street and set them on fire, please know that they are coming for your kumquats next.

so if you want a place where you can show off your beautiful kumquat art safely, you're gonna have to tolerate having some strawberries in the next room.