I have no idea

my couchsona

I would buy this and cover it in weird plush and sleep on it every night.

I didn't know they did upholstery with 1990s bowling alley carpets.

This is kinda ominous ngl

Gotta compliment him on his reflexes. No hesitation. Just described exactly what he was seeing, regardless of what it was.

[VD: A weatherman is giving a report and pointing to a map, saying "feel like temperatures really take a tumble too, because after the storm-" before he is interrupted by the screen going black and then displaying a picture of some baby spinach. He says, "um," then immediately points to the screen and confidently announces, "this is baby spinach." /End VD]

CNN has done this whole investigative scoop on how elderly retirees have been priced out of retiring to Florida and all I can say is good. That is better for the environment. That is better for maintaining a support system. Stay where your loved ones are. I hate the idea that the cost of living is so high that you cannot even afford to move to a shitty fucking red state but old people need to stop moving to Florida. I’m more concerned about the people living in Florida than the retiree/snowbird population, stay in fucking Ohio instead of moving into a condo shoddily built over endangered wetlands. There are constant natural disasters and ongoing environmental concerns, I don’t care if you wanted to retire to the beach. This is something I am so passionate about as a southeasterner even if I am not from an ‘ideal’ retirement area, moving across the country at age 65 is a terrible idea logistically speaking, moving towards family is one thing but moving to a ‘scenic vacation’ area and pricing out all the locals and then needing a caretaker while your loved ones are states away is so baddddd.

we are crowded enough!! do not come to florida!!!

Not to mention that the elderly are more vulnerable to heat stress and less capable of evacuating during natural disasters, Florida is a terrible place to move to in your golden years.

People in the Facebook group would be like “Is this a good place to retire to?” and locals would have to gently inform them that elderly residents in the region often have to leave the area because there are no doctors, no nearby hospitals, no home health aides and an overall lack of resources. It was so sickening.

ID: a digital drawing of a man in scrubs sitting on a wheeled stool, serenely smiling with his elbow on a rolling cart, where a tablet is flipped open to show an approximation of the Lord Farquaad screensaver. end ID

Reblogging this bc it’s making rounds again

i don't say this very often so you can trust me when i say for the love of god please unmute

Audio description: Very loud trilling purrring.

Very important kitty noises

I think your cat is probably a dove

love the camera guy even gets to bump into a mirror for us

Hungarian translator: I'm on it

This twink wishes he was HALF the weirdo.

I love how this sentence could apply in either direction

no it couldn't. show gonzo some respect.

I don't know how I'm ever expected to be normal again after watching this. this video is already lodging itself deep within my vocabulary as I type

Being an Eridian scientist has to be so funny. You train your entire life as a biologist, becoming specialized in your field, probably giving lectures or educational speeches to other Eridians, and then the star savior Rocky comes home with his weird pet dog. Your job is now to cultivate food so the weird dog who is the age of average baby doesn’t die. The dog also saved the stars. Your job is making dog food out of the dog. You also learn that you and the dog have the same job. You are the happiest scientist on Erid.

"Peggle make phone calls" has become shorthand for "fuck it, whatever" for me but no one ever knows what im talkingabout and it's also longer (longhand?)

Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things