umptious a bayyyy

6/7/2025

As the OP of this post, I’m going to threaten that if this gets to one million notes by the 10 year anniversary on 1 June 2026, one year from today, I will get a lower back tattoo of the loch ness bear monster.

Y'all know what to do Tumblr.

As the OP of this post, I’m going to threaten that if this gets to one million notes by the 10 year anniversary on 1 June 2026, one year from today, I will get a lower back tattoo of the loch ness bear monster.

Y'all know what to do Tumblr.

Reblog and put in the tags if you can remember where you got the shirt you're currently wearing.

Hey what's one thing you quote constantly despite knowing no one will ever understand the reference? Mine is "It's an apple dumpling!" from the charades scene in A Day At The Races.

#i literally crack up everytime #at least ten of the notes are from me

hello my name is Stray Hair snd my big dream is to play the itsy bitsy spider on broadway. doyou mind if i practice on the side of your head.

no? side of your head won't work? how about I practice in your cleavage instead

Additions from my husband: Bakers wear loafers and Zookeepers wear Crocs

Excellent additions.

Angels wear wingtips.

A lumberjack wears Timberlands.

Ice skaters wear slippers

Addition from my mom: delivery drivers wear vans

VERY good addition!

Achilles wears heels.

how is this post from this decade and not like 2012

Balearic mercenaries wear sling-backs

It's actually super unethical to keep a peeve as a pet

Reverse centaur that has the correct proportion of each body from the original centaur. Human up to the shoulders, on their hands and knees, then on top of that a horse body starting from the abdomen.

This but the bodies are correctly sized so the centaur is standing on its horse front legs and its human back legs with a pair of arms dangling in the middle because the horse half would be way too heavy to hold up any other way

Mixed-Up Parts Manticore. Tail of a human, body of a snake, head of a lion.

Who hurt you Derin?

This isn't about me. This is about reverse vampires, creatures who are weakened by darkness, are attracted by the scent of garlic, and use their long hypodermic fangs to inject blood into humans to survive. (They can't just expel it it has to go into a human. There's a magic curse element there. And if they don't inject enough blood into humans then they produce too much blood and eventually explode.)

That's literally just me.

How about a reverse cyclops then? They are terrifying, about average human size and have two eyes *shudder*

I hear they're in danger because Everybody blinds them.

please stop writing "viscous" when you mean "vicious", it produces the weirdest mental images ever

"a viscous murder" yeah i don't want to know what that could look like

it looks like the Boston Molassacre of 1919