#systemthings

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ - alters been quiet for a while?  *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ - nonhuman alters? *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ - trans alters? *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ - little alters? *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ - fictive heavy systems? *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ - alters acting similar to the host? *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ - all persecutors are *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ -  all protectors/caregivers are *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ -  all trauma holders are *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

(´,,•ω•,,)♡ - your trauma is *✧･ﾟ:* * VALID! *:･ﾟ✧*

I feel like I answered something like this before my era long hiatus, but what the hell, I can go for it again.

First of all, I wouldn't consider myself transgender per say. I wasn't born into the wrong body since as a fictive/introject I have a whole past and all. Additionally, I'm not transitioning, and I would say that I don't have an express interest in transitioning. While I would like to, I think I've come to terms with the fact that I really can't do that with my circumstances.

But yes, I do get a lot of body dysphoria. I wouldn't call it gender dysphoria exactly, while it does have gender related ties, I wouldn't call it the same thing as the dysphoria as a trans person feels. I avoid mirrors. I do dress a little more masculine when I get the chance, but it's hard to do a full costume change when I might not be fronting for long. Yes, I am incredibly uncomfortable showering or anything like that.

Since I technically have memories of being in a male body, it feels more surreal to me than anything. Just this incredible sense of wrongness which usually leads to some fun, good old fashioned dissociating. I'm disgusted by my body on things other than physical sex, but that does play a role.

Aaaaand I literally have nothing else to say. TLDR, I personally don't consider myself trans or have "traditional" gender dysphoria, however I do experience general body dysphoria with some gender related ties.

*The camera focuses on the host, is it the TV host or the system host? No one actually knows*

Good evening everyone, and welcome back to Dissociation Tonight. And now please welcome our special guest star...

*The guest star was not prepared to switch, and sits there, sort of panicking, trying to figure out what the actual fuck is happening*

“Moving on, let’s look at the current events”

*Cut to a montage of the day’s experience, complete with lots of overthinking, stress, general exhaustion and other fun feelings.*

And let’s look at the pressing matters.

*Cut to nothing. Because amnesia*

Thanks for watching and we’ll see you next time! 

*Cut to credits but the next scheduled time hardly lines up with the time the next episode is released because time and dissociation don’t like each other*

Sorry this has been sitting in the inbox for so damn long anon. Since I’ve talked about myself a little already, here’s what I’ll do.

So overall my system is pretty fictive heavy. This means that we do have fictives from different sources. I know a lot of singlets think that it’s probably some kind of crossover event, but tbh, it isn’t really. We just interact like normal(ish) human beings. Sometimes we get along well, other times we hate each other XD

I am infamous for not getting along well with most people, bet you all never saw that coming. Anyways here’s my story time.

So an alter who’s been around almost as long as I have recently came out of dormancy. The last time we spoke I was in the middle of manipulating dozens of people to be my playthings...so naturally we did not part ways on good terms.

When I saw him again I thought, ugh, great, someone who’s going to dredge up the past and I’m going to have to start apologizing all over again. Plus I did find him annoying, then and now. But then again I find everyone annoying soooo...

He’s a fictive from another source, and usually this doesn’t matter much. Sometimes we’ll talk about our sources to each other in the system, like comparing and contrasting, small talk stuff. I never talked to him much before but I was keenly aware of his source and his role in it because some of his issues carried over into him.

This is something I really want to stress, fictives seriously aren’t your perfect favorite character vibing with you. We are not perfect, we have our own problems and more often than not, people who meet us (or at least me) end up liking my character a lot less because of my flaws. An example for me would be my npd. I look charming af on the screen but I’m just an asshole irl XD

Anyways, in his source the other alter (we’re gonna call him N) had dementia or something, which impacted his social skills, and also gave him some severe ocd about some abstract things. Great for the fanfics, but irl, nnnnnot so much.

Originally I hated him more because everyone else seems to adore him. He’s awkward af but yeah he comes off as charming and sweet (aka not me) so it does make sense why he was so popular in his source to.

Side note, I don’t compare all fictives to their sources like i am rn, this one in particular is just very similar to his source and it helps to refer to.)

Anyways, good person, but dealing with some real shit. He’s fixated on luck, hope, despair, things that aren’t physical, which I guess you can get ocd about. The worst I’ve seen is his inibility to drop the belief that he has to cause something bad to happen in order to control the bad. By his logic, if something good happens, something bad will happen after, and if he causes the bad thing, like slamming our arm in a drawer, that will balance the cosmos out or something. And if he leaves it alone, then the bad thing could be anything, like us getting hit by a plane.

Make sense? Yes? No? Kind of? I’m in the last boat.

I started out being my usual asshole self. Mocking him, insulting him, I know, I’m an asshole because he can’t help it. That’s what’s really eye opening about Ocd to me. It’s that people can’t help doing what they do. It’s out of their control.

But then the bastard said that he never held anything against me even when I was at my worst and that he was happy that I’m happier. And guys, fuck, that took away anything I could use as an excuse to attack him.

So I dropped it. For the first time ever I dropped a grudge and moved on. He still annoys the shit out of me, but I’d say we’re pretty good friends now.

Moral of the story and what it has to do with fictives? Firstly fictives can change like I did, I’m not *nearly* as selfish as I used to be, I think, and that fictives aren’t perfect copies of characters. We have flaws, and those problems that make such good fanfics can suck to deal with irl. Just because a problem started out fictionally doesn’t mean it can’t have an effect on a fictive.

This is also his introduction

I’m Warren. I’m a homosexual aromatic who itentifys as cis male, though I prefer to appear quite feminine.

I’m a persecutor and a gate keeper and I take some pride in what it is I do. I make sure that order is kept in the inner world, and for that reason I’m not very much liked. But what I do is more important than being liked. I make sure certain alters don’t interact with Mordecai. I make sure Mordecai doesn’t remember the things those alters know. I rarely front, mainly observing what happens.

The other alters I get along with are the other persecutors in our system, Six and Jericho. They listen to what I say when I say it. They are the ones I send out to keep control when things get too...obnoxious. It’s not often when the others come to me for anything unless it’s to ask permission for something. I and Rick tend to fight...often. It doesn’t bother me of course, but seeing him as much as I do gets on my nerves after a bit.

With that being said, what I do is just as important as what anyone else does, if not more so. If Mordecai was bombarded with so many alters at once, then what would become of him? I may rule with an iron fist but I still know what’s good for our host.

-Warren