Jun 17
it is actually so so insane some people really believe they get to control and make decisions for someone else just because they're blood related
Loading...
seen from Italy
seen from United States
seen from Mexico
seen from Australia
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Malaysia
seen from Australia
seen from Singapore
seen from Netherlands
seen from TĂĽrkiye
seen from TĂĽrkiye
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Ethiopia
seen from Australia
it is actually so so insane some people really believe they get to control and make decisions for someone else just because they're blood related
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I love you anti endo CDD systems
I love you endo neutral CDD systems
I love you pro endo CDD systems
I love you syscourse unaligned CDD systems
I love you syscourse apathetic CDD systems
I love you CDD systems who don't care enough to form an opinion
I love you all CDD systems
I wish you all the best
I wish you all the healing whatever form it may take for you
❤️
As a (mostly) traumagenic collective who doesn’t fit stereotypical presentation, we’ve always been kind of on the fringes and not really fitting in anywhere. Back in the day, we had “too much trauma” for some spaces and “too much weird” for other places. It’s one of the reasons people here liked the DP list. They could just exist there without having to explain themselves.
We’re not saying the DP list didn’t have its problems and drama. It certainly did. But certain of our system mates that had no real place anywhere else found camaraderie there.
We’re kind of leery about the “modern” plural community bc we’ve seen so much more rabid infighting and bad takes. People seem so willing to throw other people under the bus for not being multiple “right”. So much energy seems directed at hating on people that could be better spent doing something constructive. I/ we don’t understand it any better now than we did then.
And it still leaves people like us kind of…on the outside looking in. Wondering if this is as good as it gets. Wondering if we’ll ever fit anywhere.
Stiles19
apparently ignoring the possible new guy won't make him go away but just very upset that i'm not listening. who would have thunk
I hate whenever I see something that's technically accurate in the context of CDDs but it's worded in a way that just ends up hurting someone with a CDD. like. "your alters aren't literally screaming in headspace, you're just having a trauma and dissociative response and that's you internally screaming"
well. yes? I know what parts/alters are you don't have to explain it to me lol. I rationally know alters aren't literally other, separate people just that so happen to coexist in my body. I know that when Finnegan is internally screaming his lungs out it's because I (or we as a whole system) am in so much pain.
however it does benefit me to see each other with a degree of separateness. it helps me to say "this is Finnegan having a reaction to something that happened a long time ago, and we can now get the help we need to heal this part"
it's not always the best thing for every system to view themselves as "a single shattered whole". if it works for you, that's good and I hope you find the healing you need. it just doesn't work for me yk. we should let everyone identify their own system and alters however they want in a way that benefits them, be it parts, alters, system, clown car. whatever floats your boat.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I've been thinking about my and my sysmates' (internal) senses of self and appearances lately. Most of us are used to having a single internal appearance, or a curated set of similar appearances (e.g. different outfits), in our minds. Generally we were under the impression that this was easier for us. And while it is true that it is easier for organisational purposes for people to have a face they can put next to their name on Google Docs (as we discussed the other day), we've found recently that keeping one face (or name, gender, personal style, species, favourite colour, etc.) does not match many of our natural inclinations.
The thing about being a sysmate-- about being any kind of person-- is that a sysmate (person) is a collection of vibes more than anything. Having an internal appearance can be useful, but it's an interface, not the real self. There are no rules saying it must be the same all the time, or that it must be within a standard deviation or two of one's body's appearance. The usefulness of an internal appearance ends when it becomes a mask or a box, which, for many of us, ours had become that way. So many of us let loose with it, myself included. We said, let's use a different name for a bit (it doesn't have to be forever). Let's wear new clothes, try on a new gender (turns out most of us are a little bit, or a lot bit, genderfluid! The more you know!), play with our voice, embrace a different aspect of ourselves, just for a while. Let's be whoever the hell we want to be. And we can go back to the old appearance, if we so choose, but even if we never go back, we are still the same person. The sense of agency and self and personality and memory, the "vibe", the important stuff-- none of that changed. What changed was the accuracy of our reflection, and/or the angle we were using to perceive ourselves.
Of course, this is devastating for our organisational documents that often use pictures of ourselves. Oops! Some of us have thrown around the idea of assembling images that capture a sysmate's "vibes" and essentially creating a moodboard or an image gallery, which isn't the worst idea. Personally speaking, I like this idea, because I could theoretically pick as many images as I could fit on the page. I also just like that I can use it to express that there are many facets of me-- parts of me, dare I say. The idea that sysmates are parts of one person that fulfill certain roles, and thus are rather one-dimensional and rigid in their self-expressions, is so prevalent in the plural community that I hadn't realised I had subconsciously been forcing myself to adhere to it. The truth is that I do "have facets [parts]"-- they're my facets. And they are distinct from my sysmates, who are not versions of me, but who are instead separate people with their own facets as well. Now that I'm internalising this, I plan on expressing all of me in all of its bizarre and contradictory glory (everyone is bizarre and contradictory! It's great!). It should be fun.
Okay but shoutout to systems/plurals and also schizospec and psychotic people who are boring. Who don't make weird art or whose symptoms/traits aren't interesting to watch happen. The ones who don't want to be a spectacle and subsequently don't "look" neurodivergent.
A lot of us (myself included) found comfort in being othered and became entertainers to bridge the gap of dehumanization but that isn't the only valid response and you deserve respect and acceptance too.
In other news, yesterday it was snowing. I love winter. Some of my sysmates, however, hate it. I could tell they were lingering around the pilot seat somewhere, because daydreams about palm trees are still occasionally floating into my mind's eye. Sorry, guys.
This is somewhat interesting, though, because a lot of our preferences for seasons are based off of physical tolerances. One of my sysmates prefers summer because they can't stand temperatures under 60 Fahrenheit, but I'm the opposite way; above 75 Fahrenheit and I can't take it anymore. I wouldn't have thought that temperature tolerances are psychologically based like that, and that they could therefore change based on the sysmate running the show. With that in mind, I wonder if I could purposefully alter my temperature preferences.
The other reason why we have season preferences has to do with cherished memories. This I find interesting because it tells me a lot about the sysmate in the pilot's seat, and how sysmates are formed. One of my sysmates fantasises about palm trees and playing video games in my grandmother's basement as a little kid, with no worries in the world. She likes summer because it reminds her of being carefree. But I like winter because it reminds me of when I had a birdfeeder as a kid, and watching the birds flock there in the winter. Despite the fact that we don't have different memories, per se, the ones we value and think about first are different, and that results in changes in personality and opinion. I find that fascinating, too. It's not the set of memories that makes one person different from another; it's the 'ranking mechanism' for those memories that makes the individual.