#plurallet

Since we've started trying to give sides of ourself shapes and faces to better understand ourself lately, I wanted to come up with a description for everything that still remains undefined. the "grey spaces" between us, the messy bits of thought and personality that remain difficult to label or neatly categorize. thoughts that feel like they're coming from outside our sence of selves (particularly, a lot of the intrusive ones we get that are completely out of any of our systems of belief).

I think embodying Nebulous would likely be when we're blurry, disassociating, or otherwise not lining up with any facets we have an understanding of.

(though I will say, forms of dissassociation can also fall under Lunar & Umbral's wheelhouses as well. their sense of selves are both shaped by depersonalization / derealization in some way or another, at least in part)

🍂 (fallen leaves) - Do you experience yourselves as individuals, as parts of a whole, or some secret other thing?

🌿 (herb) - What tools, if any, do you use to navigate life as a plural system?

(edit: forgot to link back to the game!)

🌱 - During some of the most stressful months of my life I fell down a rabbithole researching plurality and trying to figure out if that was some part of what was going on in my head. That's when I started seriously questioning, and the first time I really thought I might be plural.

For a short few days I even kinda had a guy in my head who'd tell me we were plural, but it was confusing when we talked and we struggled to tell ourselves apart. Then he disappeared, and I've been stuck in varying states of uncertainty about it ever since!

Some days I've been certain I'm not plural, sometimes it's felt beautifully certain that we are, most days I'm really not sure

🍂 - Somewhere between "Parts of a whole" and "Secret third thing"? Sometimes I feel pretty distinctly one person, and sometimes we feel like it's definitely more complicated than that, but it's rare that we've ever had facets distinct enough from each other to even have separate names. Generally we exist in some kind of nebulous fluid state, and I question where "I" ends and "we" begins.

I tend to describe it as different sides, facets, or aspects of myself. or as becoming different versions of myself. I've also really enjoyed saying "myselves" or "ourself" (when we're feeling more plural it's very affirming)

🌿 - I can mostly live just like a neurodivergent singlet without plural-specific tools, but I have tried to use tools to try and communicate with myselves or try and figure out who i/we are better

I haven't used Simply Plural often, but it's nice to have some logs of previous attempts at conversations between myselves. they're usually kind of confusing, since we struggle to seperate ourselves or tell our voices apart, but it's nice to have a record of previous questioning attempts after periods of being in complete denial for a while

the other thing We/I've tried is journaling specifically to try and notice changes in personality/selves day to day, but after a while of doing that it kind of just made me feel more like i didn't know who i was than anything else.

i think my (our?) plurality is not good enough because it's mostly based around alterhumanity and a possibly PD as it's less like fully autonomous headmates with their own will or something, and more like... parts of me, based off me, that i sometimes become for some time (or just me having a different predisposition as i'm auDHDistic; but i've also suffered kid/tween/early adolescence trauma but wtv); and it's just so.... :////

idk if i can even call myself /? a system becasue of this. i feel like it's not good enough... though i had ONE time where i woke up with different attire but i was blacked out, not even a fuzzy memory of it!?? i usually remember when i change/fold clothes or do something specific after i wake up in the middle of the night then go back to sleep ..... that was pretty odd; also i cannot trust my own memories lol... they either feel like fake placeholders, fillers.. created by my brain.. some surrealistic shit and sometimes i cannot tell whether it happened or not; sometimes i am fully sure it happened but it FEELS fake... egiuugh, idk when this happened but it's been long enough to be my "new normal". lol

-🗝️

I think you're our first plurallet experience.

There's nothing I can personally comment on. It's really not my system's experience.

I think this could speak to the other plurallets who might feel left out in plural spaces.

plurallet and syslet for anon!

Fronting has been really hard since the core disappeared. We attributed it to stressful times, but our corse was also a shell

Is the reason fronting is harder and a lot more blurry because we can't settle on the shell to solidify ourselves anymore ??