What the hell are you doing here you should sleep

Amazon made their service worse, to force people to pay for Prime.

Nowadays, if you order from Amazon, there is a week long delay before your package is shipped. (on purpose)

I remember when orders would ship out the same day. (I remember - it was real)

YouTube didn't used to have ads. Now, ads play in the middle of videos. (it's worse than TV ever was)

The best can opener I have owned is over 40 years old. Modern ones just don't hold up as well. (The ones I bought new broke ages ago)

The bread machine my mom got for her wedding lasted 30 years. It's been replaced twice in the last 5 years. (How can you fuck this up?)

The cardboard tubes in the middle of toilet paper rolls have gotten larger. (This too?) Companies increasing the price of the product while selling you less. (REALLY?)

It sounds crazy. (it's the truth) When you talk about it, YOU sound crazy. (it's true)

Even when people believe you (do they really), all they can say is "it sucks". (it's too big) Because the problem is so big, so pervasive, what can we even DO about it???

To get the necessary laws written and passed, we need politicians, to get the politicians elected we need information campaigns, to fund campaigns we need money, and all the money is being hoarded by the people profiting from enshittification. (it sounds so fake)

If you have more to say I'd love to hear you elaborate on how Russian being your native language gives you an advantage in learning Klingon. Is it just about the pronunciation or does Klingon have actual Russian grammar elements or some other features that are reminiscent of Russian?

I know Klingon was created to sound very "harsh" and "foreign" to the ears of the anglophone audience and if I'm not mistaken the creator looked at Russian for inspiration, but I'm unsure if that's reflected anywhere but in the phonology?

A couple years ago I did briefly try to study Klingon through Duolingo, but my general dislike of Duolingo and its methods quickly put anend to that. Way before that I also taught myself how to read Cyrillic and then spent a couple of semesters studying Russian in a language class at my university. I forgot a lot of it but I'll definitely recognize aspects I learned, so if it's up to me you can actually go quite a bit into detail here :)

Just don't expect me to be able to have an actual discussion or contribute to it in any way. Спасибо)

It's about the pronounciation, and also a bit about the grammar too

The first thing I noticed when I started learning Klingon is that I had absolutely no problem with the Object-Verb-Subject sentence structure of Klingon (unlike the English-only speakers, who weren't used to it because English is Subject-Verb-Object), and that's because Russian doesn't require any sentence structure (because whether a word is a subject or an object is expressed through inflection), so Object-Verb-Subject didn't seem weird to be because I could speak in Object-Verb-Subject in Russian if I wanted to (I've actually noticed that after learning Klingon, I was more likely to say the object of the sentence first when speaking Russian!)

Knowing Russian does make pronouncing Klingon easier too, because Russian and Klingon share the rolled R sound, and because both Russian and Klingon vowels don't do the funny dipthong thing that English sometimes does (eg. English O sometimes sounds like eowh, while Russian and Klingon are just a flat O). Some of the sounds in Russian aren't completely identical to Klingon, but they still allowed me to sound good until I was able to pronounce everything properly (eg. I (capital i) sounds close enough to ы, S sounds close enough to щ and tlh sounds close enough to кь).

Also, I just think that having your first language be as painful as Russian makes you cracked at learning languages in general :P

One thing that I did find that makse Klingon more difficult for Russian speakers are the aspect suffixes. In English, aspect is the difference between something like "I saw it" (no aspect), "I had seen it" (perfective aspect) and "I was seeing it" (continuous aspect). In Klingon, aspect is expressed with suffixes (I saw it = vIlegh, I had seen it = vIleghpu', I was seeing it = vIleghtaH), and you don't have to have aspect if it's not necessary. In Russian, aspect is always built into every verb, so the continuous version of a verb, and the perfective version of a verb, are two entirely different verbs. Because aspect is automatically built in to Russian verbs, there's no such thing as a "no aspect" verb, which makes it really difficult to explain to a Russian speaker when to use or not to use (for example) the -taH suffix, because everything in Russian already has the -taH suffix (or -pu' for perfective), all the time! So I actually don't know how to explain aspect (or lack of aspect!) to a Russian speaker XD. The only reason why I know what it is, is because English is my other native language!

what in the

Very much did in the sense that I literally do not know where my job is at the moment. But, for the time being I haven't been let go because nobody else including the store owner knows where it is either.

So, I don't wanna risk doxxing myself by posting pictures but goddamn am I tempted because this is not a believable event. This is a cartoon problem. For looneytoons.

But yeah, so, I work(ed?) at a kiosk selling boba tea, right? Freestanding kiosk in the mall with full water and electrical hookups and multiple fridges and sinks and a mini kitchen and the works. Fully functional tea shop. Very important to note that it was there last night, The work chat was discussing another issue last night at closing time. I'll get back to this.

It's been showing signs of being on the way out with how business is being handled lately and I've been considering other options, which is probably why I'm not as torn up about this as I should be, but maybe it just hasn't set in yet, but that's not the point. The point is there's been a lot of shit breaking and not being replaced and nobody mentioning anything about it until I walk into work in the morning and have to figure out why shit like the fucking cash register isn't there today. So I'm kinda used to having to ask questions about big things that nobody bothered to update me on. I was out for two weeks recovering from a surgery, so I came to work this morning assuming there'd be some kind of bullshit, yeah?

So, the question I had to ask the chat this morning was:

Not a text I ever thought I'd have to send in sincerity, but there it is. Because what I found instead was a fenced off patch of discolored tiles and a few holes in the floor where my entire place of employment used to be.

And the answer? Nobody knows! It was there last night when the mall closed, and every single trace of the structure and all its contents including drink making supplies and our safe and cashbox was gone when it opened again. And when I say nobody knows, I mean everyone from last night's closers to the actual (former?) owner of the store jad no fucking clue about this until getting that text from me this morning. For once I am actually the first to know. 🎉.

So. I guess I didn't so much lose my job as had it stolen. Not by AI, but good old fashioned hands-on human beings picking it up and carrying it away somehow. All mall security would tell me was that they were instructed not to tell me anything and have us contact our management. Who also don't know anything. And later on I came across some construction workers around the gravesite of the kiosk discussing filling in the holes, asked them about it, and was told that they "weren't at liberty to say".

So, not only is my job gone in the most literal physical sense of the word, but it was taken in some kind of super secret kiosk extraction in the dead of night without any warning or witnesses and nobody is allowed to speak of it. The store owner said she was gonna figure it out 10 hours ago and still no word back.

My mother in law thinks the FBI took it.

Not any of the other stores around the state. Just the one little kiosk.

Why? Because she loves a conspiracy and is just a little bit extra.

Also because she was around for the massive crackdown on Yakuza-owned businesses in Waikiki (in her homestate) that did actually involve the FBI seizing stores (no confirmation of making kiosks cleanly disappear in the middle of the night though).

Still no word from my job on what's actually going on, but the most likely theory so far is that maybe the kiosk was on lease and got repossessed? The mystery continues

According to the owner, based on what she's been able to find out, the kiosk was not removed legally and they're starting a potentially long process of legal action. I hope she gets to sue the shit out of whoever did it but for now at least I know for sure I'm unemployed.

Really hoping for more details in terms of who/why/how, so I'll keep updating if I learn anything.

For now the summary is: An unnamed entity that is most likely mall management (on account of mall security cooperating with them) stole an entire kiosk and all the contents including money and machinery with barely a trace in the middle of the night grinch-style, with zero warning or explanation, and ensured the silence of both security and the construction crew, in an action that was definitely preplanned and illegal, and as far as I know nobody knows its whereabouts.

Enjoy the unintentionally funniest text I've ever sent in my life

Aaand a close-up:

HEY HI HELLO THIS ONE'S MY FAVORITE

For my nominations, I’m putting up:

If you eat a chocolate bar a very specific way, you will break physics and get infinite chocolate.

or

It is impossible that you spelled “Berenstain Bears” wrong and is, instead, more likely that the universe fractured into separate, overlapping realities in the last 20 years.

“Bitch, That’s the Tubby Custard Machine” (http://imgur.com/gallery/IObQF)

infinite chocolate hack

berensta/ein bears (mandela effect)

mri scan walking dead gif

train gif brain thinks you died

tubby custard machine

horse dildo

moonmelon (and variations)

alexandria’s genisis

bird chocolate fountain og post

soap shrinks water molecules

we are killing the earth

ham on dog

tequila isnt a depressant

earth is lumpy

joker without makeup

voldemort fetus

two way mirror og post

Only under two conditions:

You're in a group where randomly sharing porn for shits and giggles is normal behaviour that people can reasonably expect to happen, and you're not doing that just to shock people who aren't used to that kind of thing.