the heavenly ballet of the wonderplane

"why did you stop writing your story!!! never stop writing!!!!!!!!!!!" well you see the character had to drive one mile to a new location and the sentence "she got into the car" was quite simply my undoing

This is one of your worst posts yet man

You called me dirt sucking poor and told me my carrot looks like a cock

Lets all suck on glass together and make the aquarium clean for everyone

When I was training to be a paramedic, we had one student ask the instructor what to do in the event of a marijuana overdose. The instructor said "Tell him to take two twinkies and call you in the morning."

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

that kitty really went

It’s actually so fascinating watching its eyes expand and dilate