Just had a thought, it's completely half-baked: So, um, NoME I think, said that there totally could be hröar without any fëar running around, right? Translating: there could be moving bodies with no souls/occupants left.
Zombies. Middle Earth has zombies.
And when would be a better time for zombies to roam around than after Nirnaeth Arnoediad? Even more after Second and Third Kinslaying. You know who would have a perfect opportunity to fight zombies to the point of habit? Fëanorians.
So I imagined the situation where Maedhros and Maglor fight some zombies, successfully turning them into parts (I mean, duh). Then Maedhros says something self-hating like "Surely there's more good to them than was left of us(me) as it hunts and hurts without consent, intent nor will, unlike us(me)."
And Maglor looks at him, then at the zombie's head he holds. He reaps the skull open (with his hands, yes), takes zombies' brain out, and throws it at Maedhros with "We also have an evidence he had a brain, unlike some brother of mine."
Cue Medhros releasing the MOST Older Brother Sigh.
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Haleth: Hi Maedhros. Can you come over? I may have accidentally killed your brother.
Maedhros: You did what now?
Haleth: I missed my husband. You guys were gone for two weeks and we wanted to celebrate and I thought it was weird that he kept on saying in Quenya something about the sons of Feanor can endure anything. and then he passed out.
***
Maedhros: Good news everyone! You can all hear me on group chat?
Maeglor: Yes. What's wrong with him?
Maedhros: Moryo is fine. He's just in a sex coma
Celegorm: That's a thing?!
Curufin: Can you imagine Ada's reaction, Nelyo? "Son. Did you die glorious in battle?" "No. I died making love to my really hot human wife!"
*everyone laughs*
Meadhros: Now seriously. Everyone. This is our brother, we're going to love him and take care of him, and most importantly, we're never going to let him forget about this.
I've done a lot of rethinking on the Noldor dress in the First Age/ after Noldor's arrival to the Middle Earth. Ancient Persia is still very much the main source of inspiration. But yeah some of the older designs for Noldor I've done are definitely outdated (especially Meadhros, but also Fingon to some extent, I'll redesing them at some point).
Another phone ficlet ✨! Enjoy 1.1k of Maedhros getting bullied by bb!aragorn and legolas! (Has Maedhros been re-embodied? Is this a Maedhros Lives AU? who knows, not me.)
Loosely inspired by Cast in Stone by @balrogballs which also features delightful amounts of Maedhros getting bullied by Estel and Legolas.
-----
"What's this rubbish?" Estel held up the coin Maedhros had deposited in his palm, and instead of looking in the least thankful for his act of – considerable – generosity, the boy seemed, if anything, outraged. Repulsed, even.
"You said you needed money for the fair, didn't you?" Maedhros bit out, more peeved than he would like to admit by the lacklustre response. While beaming genuflection was, perhaps, too much to ask for, sincere gratitude was not, and this was neither.
But the little brat paid no heed to Maedhros's aggravation and waved the coin in his face. "This isn't enough, old man! Haven't you ever heard of inflation? You're not in the First Age anymore – you can't buy yourself five white stallions and a handy with the spare change for a single gold coin anymore. They'll laugh me out of the fairground if I show up with this! Is that what you want? You want them to laugh at me?!" Wailing out an indeterminate aiaiai he sank to the ground, dragging his hands down his face at the mere prospect of such indignity.
Maedhros felt his eye twitch. Never, not once in all his long, debaucherous years in Tirion, would he have dared to even think the word handy in Finwë's presence.
Elrond, he thought sourly, should have walloped this boy more. Or even just once.
Pulling another coin out of his pocket with a curse, he slammed it onto the table between them. "There! And don't you even think of asking for more!" he added when the boy opened his mouth to, no doubt, protest once again.
"Ugh! You're such a cheapskate," the boy fumed, "just my luck! To have five grandfathers and each more stingy than the next."
That wasn't quite fair, thought Maedhros, given that two of the boy's grandfathers were dead, another was a star, and one was – well Maglor was definitely a cheapskate. If asked to borrow a few pennies, Maglor was liable to hand over a conch shell from his robes and start waxing poetic about the priceless gift of Ilúvatar's music.
"You know what the problem is?" piped in his little elven friend from the corner in which he was doing a handstand so quietly Maedhros had clean forgotten he was even there. "The problem is," he continued, quite sagely for a boy whose face was turning plum-purple from all the blood rushing to his head, "that he's unemployed."
Righting himself with a tidy flip, he pranced over to Estel and draped his lanky body over the other boy's shoulder and attempted to whisper, "I mean, think about it, where's he even getting the – little – money he has from? It's not like anyone would hire him. He's probably," the Prince of Mirkwood looked around furtively, "killing people for it."
Estel looked suitably alarmed. "Atto, are you some kind of highwayman? Be honest now!"
"Don't be ridiculous," Maedhros sputtered, "Of course I'm not a highwayman."
Neither boy looked convinced. "Then where did you get these?" He held up the coins Maedhros was fast regretting forking over like a lawyer displaying damning evidence in court.
"None of your business," he snapped, moving forward to confiscate the ill-gotten plunder, "Must a man account for every coin in his purse? See if you ever get another penny from me again, boy."
But Estel only scurried out of range, clutching his booty protectively to his chest lest his wicked grandfather snatch it from him. "You must have gotten it from somewhere." he said, laughing nervously. "What – does Ada give you pin money too?"
For one brief but incriminating second, Maedhros froze before he recovered himself, scoffing, "What nonsense." But it was too late. Like a shark attracted to the chum, the boy scented his weakness in the air. Had it been any other time and any other victim, Maedhros might even have been proud of him.
"Oh my god," breathed Estel, eyes wide as saucers, "He does. Ada gives you pin money." Next to him, his horrid little friend started braying with laughter like some blonde, two-legged donkey.
Forgetting his earlier trepidation, the boy rushed towards him. "How much? D'you get more than me? That's not fair! You shouldn't get more than me!"
"Of course I get more than you," Maedhros snapped, so offended by the idea of recieving even less of an allowance than his own grandson that he forgot to deny the accusation entirely.
Luckily for him, and unluckily for Elrond, his son chose that moment to make his entrance, and rather than waste any more time bandying words about uselessly with his grandfather, Estel decided to go straight to the source.
Flinging a hand in Maedhros's direction, he demanded, "Ada, does Atto get more pin money than me?"
"Stop calling it pin money," Maedhros barked even as a bemused Elrond started hemming and hawing, "and of course I do. Yonya, tell him."
"Well..." Elrond began, eyes darting between the two of them like a deer caught between two hunters trying to decide which would be more merciful.
Slowly, Maedhros turned to face him more fully. "Elrond," he said, with as much menace as he could muster (a not inconsiderable amount, for the curious and uninitiated), "I do get more than him, don't I?"
Elrond wouldn't meet his eyes. "Oh, you know–"
Life really was just an unending series of indignities, wasn't it?
"The boy?" he exploded as Estel joined his friend in bursting into peals of hysterical laughter, slapping his thighs and pointing at Maedhros through streaming eyes, "The boy gets more than me?!"
As if being maintained by one's son was not already humiliating enough.
Having rapidly regained his equilibirum, Elrond huffed and rolled his eyes. "Oh come off it, Atto. He's young – he has sweets to get, friends to impress. You, on the other hand, buy one new cloak every ten years, what will you even do with more pin money–"
"It's not pin money–"
"And you – give me that," reaching over, he wrestled Estel's loot away from him, "Stop extorting your grandfather for money."
Maedhros held out his hand expectantly, shooting Estel a smug smirk over Elrond's head, and then stared in incredulous horror as, instead of returning his largesse, Elrond slipped it discreetly into his own pocket.
"Now, please," he continued as if nothing has happened, "don't let Maglor find out I'm giving you an allowance else he'll bleed me out of house and home and neither of you will see so much as another copper piece from me again." That said, he swept out of the room, leaving both grandfather and grandson gawping after him.
A sullen silence settled in the air, broken only by Estel scuffing his foot sulkily against the floor. "I guess that's what I get for taking from the poor," he grumbled, not looking at Maedhros.
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I've been rotating the idea that the expression "chill" meaning calm comes from Himring and my conclusion is this: when a watch, especially at night, was calm, the guard would ask "how's the night?" when they came to replace the previous rota, and the other would answer "The night is chill." bc the only thing that happened was that it was cold. Maedhros hates this with a burning passion in the same way he'd hate a stupid pun from one of his brothers.
By the Third Age chill is a common slang word amongst the Exile and nobody really recalls where it comes from except maybe a couple old guards who survived and followed Elrond and snigger like teenagers whenever they hear young Elves use this expression bc they know Maedhros would be pissed to know it passed in the common vocabulary.
Not the magnus anon, consider, ultra magnus orgy with Predaking, Optimus, and Wheeljack.
Maybe he gets sparked 👀
Big, heavy, refineries. Also babies. Full of babies. Between Optimus' breeding kink and Predakings probable breeding kink(at the very leat repopulating his species) and wheeljack definitely being a kinmy fucker. He is fucked out and full of transfluid.
Who r u and how TF did you get my notes app!!!!! 🫣🫣🫣 Akkslqkakskwwaaa Am I that obvious!?!??! 😭 Breeding kink so strong it shines through da goddamn blog 😔😔
Okay but idea: instead of Ultra Magnus, Wheeljack and Predaking fighting, it devolves into an orgy 😳😳 maybe predakings in rut or something, he's obv pissed at losing the rest of the predacons, but luckily for him he's got a nice big bot in front of him perfect for breeding.
They do fight of course, well, Wheeljack and Ultra Magnus think they're fighting but Predakings trying to get a perceived rival (Wheeljack) out of the way long enough for him to claim Ultra Magnus. Wheeljack gets thrown into the wall and gets back up just in time to see Predaking fingering Ultra Magnus open, just enough prep so Ultra Magnus can take the heads of both of his spikes.
^wheeljack trying to figure what he's supposed to do, he just gained respect for Ultra Magnus and now realized he ALSO wants to fuck him
Maybe fucking you mate on top of your defeated 'rival' is some kinda instinctive predacon thing 🤭🤭
Optimus comes back to check on them and make sure Wheeljack and UM are okay, and instead walks in on Ultra Magnus being spit roasted, covered in paint transfers that make it clear Wheeljack and Predaking have both fucked him multiple times. Optimus and ultra Magnus have been dancing around a whole 'thing' since Magnus landed on earth, so of course he's going to want Optimus to take a turn filling him up with transfluid.
They ground bridge back to base later like "surprise! New dragon autobot :)" and the kids are distracted enough by a cool ass dragon transformers they don't notice Ultra Magnus hiding away until the transfluid bump goes away. But it turns out with three attentive sires, the bump doesn't go away. In fact, Ultra Magnus just gets bigger as the sparklings of a prime and a huge predacon (and Wheeljack's tiny bitty that was kinda a surprise cause she was hiding behind her siblings in the scans) grow inside him. Poor Magnus 🤭🤭🤭
(also poor fowler, having to deal with these horny robots having BABIES. Maybe him and June can have a nice date night to make up for it lol)
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TFA Ultra Magnus ends up in the world of TFP and unintentional seduces Soundwave, Shockwave, Predaking, Makeshift (who lives), and Dreadwing (who also lives). He doesn't mind except he has no clue how he did it.
TFP Megatron did try to seduce him but Ultra was having none of Fumbletron's nonsense. Mostly because he didn't want to get in between whatever was going on between that world's Megatron and Optimus but also because UM was put off by the Dark Energon. Plus, he already has a Megatron he loves :)
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