Okay SO, here's what happened.
The induction was booked for 9pm Saturday, meaning I had until 8ish Saturday to get into a near established labour if I was gonna get the pool.
Thursday night: a twinge! How exciting! It's all kicking off! I'll have a paracetamol and a nap so I'm rested for this ordeal
Friday morning: okay, we fell asleep and it stopped, but Today Is The Day! I'll give the dog a big walk, do a last minute tidy, and Be PREPARED
Friday afternoon: ...how come I haven't felt anything else yet? Don't sit down or relax, let's continue to potter, we have like 24hrs left to have a chillaxing spa and drugs day courtesy of the NHS. so. No pressure. But come on.
Friday evening: I refuse to sit down, instead I will walk to the shops, I will haul back baking ingredients, I will bake ALL OF THE BISCUITS. Anytime I think something might be a twinge it runs away before I can be sure.
Saturday morning: admit defeat. Pack a hospital entertainment bag and grump about. Finish making biscuits just to have something to do. There are twinges but nothing paracetamol can't handle, nothing in a pattern. It's too little to late.
Saturday afternoon: the in laws arrive to take puppy to his sleepover and even the twinges stop. Actually admit defeat and all jacuzzi hope is lost
Saturday at 7pm: twinges are back but too little too late too far apart to be useful. we're leaving for the hospital in an hour
8:30 pm: the car journey isn't actually killing what I'm now sure are early contractions? Maybe we can't have the pool, but maybe this is enough action to avoid needing induction hormones for hours?
9pm: ...and if it is enough to say its early labour, can I jump back to the chill jacuzzi hospital!?
10pm: checked in and the midwife agrees to at least check for us, if the baby is happy and if we're about 3cm then we'll be far enough along that it's established and not too far they don't want to put me back in the car for an hour
11pm: babies heart trace is looking good! And I'm 3cm!! The number the midwife had said!!! She's off to try and get a hold of the out of hours team at the jacuzzi hospital and the consultant to sign me off for leaving
11:15: as we're waiting on getting a hold of them let's pop back on the trace as it strengthens our case for the consultant to be happy for you to go
11:30: they haven't answered the phone yet but the consultant is on his way... hmm, was that a contraction just there? Looks like baby didn't like that one. Ah. Maybe we're not letting you go
11:45: Colin the consultant looks at the trace and agrees baby's not happy enough to move, let's get a bed in labour ward and get these waters broken. No jacuzzi pool for me, but induction successfully avoided! So small victories I guess
Midnight: we've got a labour room ready, I could probably walk down the 1 floor and along the corridor but at a slow waddle so I'm treated to a wheelchair ride from the midwife
Sunday 00:15: we get a FANCY labour room and a new midwife, I wasn't expecting more than the rooms we'd seen before. The paracetamol I had with dinner at half 7 is no longer cutting it but a wee breath of gas and air is โจ magical โจ
00:25: The husband fetches the bags from the car (including the updated animal crossing) and I am allowed a pee before being hooked up to the new monitors. The contraction I have on the bathroom brings me to all fours on the floor, definitely need to get back to the gas and air before the next one
00:30: I need the gas and air more than I need to get changed into my comfy labour clothes from the bags, but the husband very nicely changes me into the comfy socks I'd brought as A Treat Yo Self present for hospital
00:45: motherfucker I now see what people are on about, how has anyone ever done this drug free?! if I have hours of this to come I am gonna need one of these epidurals, I will ask as soon as I can stop taking a breath of gas
00:50: the midwife isn't sure if the baby isn't happy or if the monitor isn't picking her up because of my position, can I flip over and she'll break my waters and put a trace directly on her head? Like, I can, because I'm very polite and I want to help you do your job, but it is legitimately The Worst Pain I Have Ever Felt. Many many big deeeeep breaths of gas are taken
00:51: okay so you're fully dilated and we're gonna have this baby now, husband can you press that button and plug this here and move this light for me? Thank you
โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ ๐๐ซ๐๐ซ๐ โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ
There are so many hospital tools over there, I hope that person is alright
๐๐ซ๐๐ซ๐ my 3rd leg hurts โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ
the dinosaur letter opener from the flintstones goes nipnipnipnipnip like this
โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ someone is calling on me, oh hello lady? She is telling me to stop screaming, am I screaming? I'm sorry I'll stop that โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ
someone is moving my legs and something somewhere hurts
โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ I don't like it โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ
ow ๐๐ซ๐๐ซ๐ ow
โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ this lady is asking about cuts and cups. Am I being an inconvenience? I should do what she says, I don't want to be an inconvenience to people โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ
she's shoogling something about somewhere and I don't like that
โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ ๐๐ซ๐๐ซ๐ โจโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโจ
"one more push and you can have a preview of what your getting"
Where am I? And what is happening?
๐๐ซ๐๐ซ๐ OH! It's me! That's what I'm getting! a BABY! ๐๐๐ฅบโจ๐ฅบ๐ฅบ๐๐๐๐ฅบ
oh no baby don't cry ๐ฅบ๐๐ฅบ๐๐ญ๐๐ญ๐๐๐๐ญ๐๐๐๐ญ๐๐๐๐ญ๐ญ don't cry Eilidh it's okay ๐๐๐๐๐ I love you so much, its okay baby, don't cry ๐๐๐๐๐
01:31: good thing we didn't send you to the jacuzzi hospital, this baby would've been born on the motorway
Some time later, while munching hospital toast with the husband: you didn't even have time to play your game
