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hello instagram artist. your challenge is to do a portrait study of a woman but you’re not allowed to stylize them so their eyes are really big and more cat eyed than the reference photo. You’re also not allowed to make their noses more of a button nose or their lips full and pouty or their faces heart shaped with no double chin. Also you have to draw a fat woman. one thats actually fat and not just slightly curvier than the kpop demon hunters body type. good luck
I try not to fall into the "I never liked their work anyway" ditch when an artist/creator reveals themself to be a terrible person
BUT
a feeling I do have and will stand by is "While I enjoyed their work overall I did have some gripes that I overlooked out of affection and whimsy, but now that my loyalty is gone and my affection tainted there is nothing holding me back from enumerating my many grievances, to which the revelations of the creator's shittiness may or may not provide a new and infuriating context."
#such a good summation of this actually#because yeah there’s usually things that were always present#but which were easy to overlook or give the benefit of the doubt#that suddenly become relevant after a revelation about the creator#and it’s really not the same thing as the self-defensive “’I never liked it anyway’
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I made a new oc but I am missing a name so I am consulting the only expert I know that can give me what I want: baby name sites ran by white american moms.
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In a piece for The New Inquiry from back in 2017, George Dust states that when queer people complain about there being a top shortage, what they really mean is “nobody is fucking me the way I want, and I have no agency in that.” Alongside co-authors Billy-Ray Belcourt and Kay Gabriel, Dust suggests that many queer people align themselves with a passive or “bottom” position because they believe that role will absolve them of the guilt of really wanting things. They present themselves as what they believe to be the sexual party with zero power; the receiver, the accepter of action rather than its cause.
This position is drawn in contrast to the bottom-identified person’s idea of a top: the one who approaches, the person with hungers and desires, the person who decides which sexual activities will happen and how intense they will get. The top, from this perspective, is the stronger, more capable, more dangerous person. They’re the only one who can ever be guilty of intruding or harming somebody else. This power is scary, but it’s also compelling.
Dust calls this fantastical version of a top a “brute” — and they are the most cartoonish stereotype of what it means in society to be a man. Because it’s a cartoonish stereotype, no human actually lives up to it — and we’d probably revile a person even if they could.
Though queer people know we are harmed by the gender binary and heteronormativity and all the social scripts those things force upon us, its biases are still embossed on our brains. Without meaning to, we reproduce tired gender stereotypes in our relationships. And so we see expressing a sexual want as masculine, and being masculine as being more capable of violence and coercive control, and thus bad. We see failing to communicate one’s desires openly as desirably feminine, as well as a sign of blamelessness and purity — because on some level we still feel it is wrong to have desires.
But this entire worldview is a complete lie. Desire is not evil. Expressing attraction is not a violation. Failing to express oneself can be just as dangerous as not listening to someone else’s limits. Women can be abusive. Bottoms can sexually assault. No matter our gender, presentation, or sexual role, we are each capable of harm. And the only way to make a safe, mutually pleasurable sexual encounter happen is by going after it, actively, and communicating from a position of inner strength.
So how do you do that, if society’s been telling you all your life that you’re meant to date by acting like a deer passively snapping twigs in the woods, waiting for some hunter to hear you, and pursue you? (That really is dating advice that Evangelical Christian counselors give to women, if you can believe it).
By not fixating so much on what you’re doing or not doing to draw other people toward you, and instead thinking in terms of what you want and what you observe beyond yourself.
#ooooh boy. yeah..#i definitely was like this whne i was first coming out. this is really good writing#it's hard to unlearn. it's hard to change. but havigg that agency is so so important#for yourself. for not making your partner do all the emotional work#for owning your sexuality/queerness without guilt#anyways. genuinely sorry to every butch/masc i had a crush on when i was a baby gay. hope y'all are doing well
Love when people add these. Thanks for sharing about your growth!
I still maintain that the issue is not only are people ashamed of what they want--many people aren't--they're just uncomfortable talking about sex in general and especially with partners. (The more discourse bends towards "thinking about having sex with someone is a violation of that person" the harder initiating sex becomes.) And a lot of people with anxiety seem to just want a good grade in sex (normal to want, possible to achieve) and have decided the best way to get that is to find a partner who knows exactly what they want and is fully comfortable explaining that, ideally via step-by-step instructions--and who also knows what the anxious person wants (intuitively, of course) and do it without having to do the uncomfortable part of Talking About It.
There might not be a top shortage, but there's definitely a telepath shortage, so that might be where the confusion lies
you can stay indoors all day when the sun is out, and sometimes it's nice like a cool draught from a tranquil spring, but watch out because if you stay indoors for two days in a row while the sun is out you start doing odd gothic literature things, stalking the halls and passages and muttering to yourself and parting the blinds to gaze down at your neighbours with a haunted look before turning away to contemplate your mannequins #yourmannequins. three days and you're basically fucked. you have to throw a towel over your head to scurry as far as the store for milk and people jeer at you like frankenstein's monster.
“3,090 degrees Fahrenheit is the temperature at which sand becomes glass, in a process known as the Pilkington Process. This is not the temperature of burning; this is the temperature of becoming something.”
I’m in a bit of an art slump lately but today is the anniversary of me posting my first silm fanart on here so I celebrated it with a quick redraw of it with my current Maglor design (Elrond didn’t really change)
Thank you everyone for welcoming me, having the loveliest words of encouragement and being all talented people with crazy ideas. It’s a pleasure to be in this fandom with you ♡
I think I still prefer this version but it was 100% the by-product of me discovering and testing stuff on procreate ><
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latest instalment in the Hot Elves By Balls™️ series features Finrod in an outfit I would probably actually kill people to wear… commissioned by the wonderful @justdrowthings, whose brief for this portrait included the phrases “peak why do we talk about ANYONE when this guy exists” and “major art directive - break me”, and agreeing entirely, I was only too happy to oblige 😌😌😌
annaxmalina
areudirty
ellievsbear
andulkaphoto
turnnoffyourmind
