Eel, I guess @eel-lair - Tumblr Blog

this is what i sent

this is what i got

Image description:

1st image: A screenshot of the end of an online check-out process. Text around a free-text box reads "Special Instructions, Jokes, Interesting Facts (this is printed on the packing slip; prices are not printed on packing slips)". Under the box it says "Subtotal $7.00". Inside the free-text box the user has written, "they say prices are not printed on the packing slips, but i have the power to defy this; the price is $7.00".

2nd Image: A photo of the packing slip for the above item. The user's packing slip message now reads, "they say prices are not printed on the packing slips, but i have the power to defy this; the price is…….. missing? unknown? unknowable? spirited away by some force esoteric and external to all human tradition? gradually i become certain that the price is not printed on the packing slip, and in fact never was". End description.

alexseanchai

addendum to image description: the item ordered is a three point five inch patch with the Welcome to Night Vale logo.

#ah wtnv #that explains that

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tothechaos

this is what every tiktok screenshot looks like to me

things-that-are-weezer-blue

Yup

tothechaos

there are gimmick blogs the likes of which you cannot conceive on this goddamn website

dogmotif-deactivated20240505

if you're not obsessed with anything weird and niche please try harder. stop going outside for a while. consider getting weirder about the things you already like

ifyouknowmeirlgoaway

Whenever I see a post talking about how it's okay to steal from huge corporations, when they have shit like self checkout, I always want to jump up and say they have cameras and are collecting your information and you need to be so careful because yeah like they're inflating the prices and running monopolies and price fixing with competitors but everybody is caring about shoplifters more and that's really fucked up, but you also need to consider that Target might be keeping track of every time you don't scan something or intentionally scan it wrong, and just waiting for it to add up to a felony.

Which feels entirely beside the point and almost inappropriate to bring up when the point is that the customer is already a victim of theft, but I feel like there are people encouraging others to do stuff that can absolutely end up with them in jail without mentioning at all that it's a risk.

stringlesswyrme

This is real and here are some sources discussing facial recognition in various retail settings. fuck corporations but also go in knowing all the facts 🫡 Kashmir Hill is a great journalist who’s entire beat is facial recognition and how it’s deployed, and she’s an amazing resource if you want to learn more about facial recognition in general. highly recommend her new book on clearview ai too, it’s a great read

ACLU lawsuit that stops clearview from being sold to retail in the us (but doesn’t stop retail from buying other facial recognition tech) https://www.aclu.org/cases/aclu-v-clearview-ai

The ACLU, ACLU of Illinois, and the law firm Edelson PC filed a lawsuit on May 28, 2020 against Clearview AI alleging violation of Illinois

Little regulation exists on the tech

https://www.nytimes.com/2023/03/10/technology/facial-recognition-stores.html

Our reporter took a five-mile walk around Manhattan to find businesses that are using facial recognition technology.

https://www.seattletimes.com/business/barred-from-grocery-stores-by-facial-recognition/

An Illinois woman has filed a federal lawsuit seeking class-action status against Macy's for allegedly using Clearview AI facial recognition

Targets privacy policy, scroll down to the camera section

Find out more about the Target Privacy Policy.

ifyouknowmeirlgoaway

You are the coolest person in the world to me for finding all those sources.

mono-red-menace

copper my beloved

mono-red-menace

rose gold, brass, bronze, what cant she do

mono-red-menace

beautiful base colour, beautiful patina, and it mixes to make beautiful alloys. 10/10 best metal.

mono-red-menace

she also makes up so much of your wiring, she’s a working gal too.

what CANT she do

kirby-left-front-away-from-me

Don’t forget about the most beautiful blue made by copper sulfate!!

mono-red-menace

my absolute FAVOURITE comments on this post are ones like this.

where they just add on something ELSE that copper does. it’s great.

aspiringwarriorlibrarian

When you need to work in an atmosphere where a stray spark could cause an explosion, you switch out your steel tools for copper alloys since it conducts heat much better and thus won’t spark easy.

swan2swan

So when Tumblr user @mono-red-menace hypes up copper, it’s a 60k-note banger, but when I, Ea-nasir,

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androidboy

literally my favorite type of tweet

forgissimus

oh my god i have some of these saved 1 sec

desinteresse

It’s funny when American authors come up with a new European nation so their main character can be a secret royal without the pain of researching a real nation. We should all start doing that with North America, just make up a new state. My protagonist lives in New Utahioshington which is the 51st state and located between Delaware and Maryland

#for future writing maybe

girlballs-archive

What if we had a plagiarism scandal here on tumblr, kinda annoyed at the youtubies having all the fun

charlottan

you cant do this to my post

foxbirdy

A short comic I made about my experiences as a seasonal worker, and the way places change you.

Prints & PDF

#art by op #story by op #writing by op #comic by op

omghotmemes

somethingusefulfromflorida

im-a-goat-in-disguise

The way the machine pauses like “should I do this?” before it draws the circle

bluethealpha

You can’t forget this one either

songsofwaterandnight

Ok yeah I did not expect kill stealing in tic tac toe

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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m-aremagnum

jewishdragon

Hold on i need to ask my friend Claudia, who is a college student and edits wikipedia something real quick...

THIS IS MY FRIEND CLAUDIA

what-even-is-thiss

Sometimes fiction doesn’t have a moral to the story. Sometimes fiction points at something and goes “Ever thought about THAT???” And you look at what it’s pointing at for a bit.

claudiamatossilva

Hilda by Duane Bryers

badkidgorgug

More Hilda!!

themockingcrows

in this family we love and support Hilda.

i-am-the-narwhal

Yes! Hilda!

luidilovins

What i love about this artist’s depictions of women is even the sexualized ones the woman is always genuinely happy and enjoying herself. Frolicking or making funny faces, she’s living her life and looking sexy while doing it, not sitting in a sexual pose for the audience’s view.

squish-this

I always forget about Hilda and am so pleased when she randomly shows up on my dash. Always makes my day

snailfarts

I love Hilda so much and I want her to be happy

numinous-queer

My favorite thing is how Hilda is always doing something and having a BLAST! She’s not posing coyly for anyone, she’s having her own adventures and it’s not about the viewer at all

rosellacwrites

Always reblog Hilda!

sumi-sprite

HILDA MY LOVE

memecucker

if you’re white and wanna write a poc character and feel awkward about it i implore you to ignore any twitblr stuff treating it as a massive ethical burden and instead come in more with the same mindset you’d have if you wanted to write about idk firefighters but didn’t know anything about firefighters so you do... research. Like fuck off with the weird kinda creepy calls for spiritual introspection you’re not writing about god damn space aliens you’re writing about humans and if you think you need more perspective of different life experiences just read?

mala-taste

If I were writing about firefighters I'd also, in addition to just reading about them, take advantage of Our Blessed Internet to ask actual firefighters about how shit works. I'd do the same for a minority I'm not a part of.

I remember when there was this LiveJournal community where you could just ask about anything you needed for your novel - medicine, professions, vehicles, how things function in country X - and people who knew something about that would answer.

We need to bring this back.

mala-taste

And apparently just this summer they DID bring it back - it's called Little Details and it's on Dreamwidth!!!!

alexseanchai

teaboot

The most difficult part of hiding a sword, I imagine, would not be in the actual hiding, but in squashing down the phenomenal urge to tell absolutely everyone that you *HAVE* a SWORD

teaboot

Me as a super cool secret agent: (leaning in to a stranger on the bus) hey I bet you can't guess how many awesome knives I have right now

teaboot

(In my head) Don't tell them you're an assassin. Don't them you're an assassin. Killing people is bad. Don't tell anyone you're an assassin

(Out loud) Hey does anybody want to see a dead senator

teaboot

ITS BEEN THREE YEARS AND I SWITCHED COMPANIES SO I CAN FINALLY TELL THIS STORY

Okay so I was site security, right? And I was assigned two splits in my regular shift, all at different locations (which was, essentially, working 12.5 hours a day and only getting paid for 8, which I do not recommend) and on TOP of that I was also swinging a part-time position, so I was usually on about 6 hours of sleep and zero brain function

And I'm in between one location and another (by bus, because I cannot drive) when I realize OH FUCK ITS MY BEST FRIENDS BACHELORETTE PARTY TOMORROW

By the time I get off work everything will be closed and there will be no time in the morning, so I getcoff my bus a couple stops early and figure hey, pawn shops have cool weird shit, right? Great place for a neat gift, right?

And I walk in with just my backpack and my umbrella and proceed to buy a sword

And THEN i realize that it is about fifteen minutes until I'm due to punch in, and I have no time to stop by my place, and I'm a UNIFORM SECURITY GUARD, and I'm not allowed a fucking POCKET KNIFE and I'm about to bring a goddamn SWORD into a government building

So I just kinda. Jam one end into my umbrella and tie it to my backpack.

And it works. Nobody looks twice.

But for a solid four and a half hour I was stuck on patrol with a building full of very nice people making casual and professional small talk while I'm internally white-knuckling the insane urge to tell every person who comes up to me that HEY GUESS WHAT I SNUCK A SWORD INTO WORK DO YOU WANNA SEE IT

I did manage to keep a lid on it and get out consequence-free and the bride-to-be seemed delighted so it all ended up fine anyways, but still

(The hole in physical security was managed later.)

thesaltofcarthage

I completely love that your best friend is the kind of person you buy a SWORD for, as a BACHELORETTE PARTY gift.

"Hey Doug, you're a nice guy and all, but if you ever hurt my girl Susie, just know that I've already armed her."

teaboot

I actually gave the groom a set of throwing knives

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missdibley

modernsuperhero

the rubber duck

arsonistblue

For anyone curious what they mean by the rubber duck, rubber duck debugging is a tactic used by programmers to figure out bugs in the code. To do it, they explain the code, verbally, line by line, to the rubber duck until they find it.

It’s also very useful for writers, and I’ve used it multiple times with rubber ducks, stuffed animals, and my friends.

brunhiddensmusings

“when i say it out loud i realize where the stupid was”

elidyce

I literally cannot count the number of times I’ve gone to someone and told them ‘I can’t figure out what’s wrong with my story, please let me explain it to you’ and that was all it took. Sometimes they ask helpful questions like ‘did you remember to feed them’ or ‘so is this all on the same day’ but other times I don’t even need that, it just figures itself out as soon as I try to explain it to someone else.

It’s one of my go-to pieces of writing advice. You’re stuck on your story? sit down and tell me/someone all about it.

junglejim4322

Sometimes I talk a lot and sometimes I don’t talk at all and somehow both are embarrassing

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Eel, I guess