rakel

my name is rakel, i am 21 and from sweden. i have just started a chemistry course at university, which is taking up most of my time. when i’m not studying, i like to read, sew, play instruments and sing in my choir.

ok well i havent been to the library or school today, so im technically cheating by being on here but oh well

i feel so free and so much like a kid again this isnt funny

like days feel so much longer, instead of scrolling i just sit and enjoy silence or i pick up a book or something

im actually getting my homework done (well, the homework i downloaded anyway)

i honestly dont know how long im going to try and do this for, maybe 30 days? that seems reasonable. though fear i will end up just doing it forever lmao

Look at this fine young lady! She can paint she can sew and embrody, she sings and read

And without a wealthy father to pay for that, plus she is florid in the body! She doesn’t know hunger!

My Ancestors: TRULY SH— what? They? A little unorthodox, but reasonable I suppose. TRULY THEY PROSPER, FOR THEY LIVE IN A DWELLING WITH MANY ROOMS AND ONLY THEIR SPOUSE TO SHARE IT WITH! THEY HAVE DOGS WHO DO NOT PERFORM A FUNCTION! THEY HAVE MANY BOOKS AND DO NOT HAVE TO SPIN THEIR OWN YARN! THEY BATHE AT A WHIM WITH GENTLE SOAP FREE OF LYE! OUR DESCENDANT BRINGS HONOR AND PRIDE TO OUR LINEAGE!

Me: /yawns and sips my coffee/

My impoverished Russian Jewish ancestors:

My ancestors: Our descendant, the heir to all our hopes and fears for a far-off future… She can buy fine clothes woven and knit by automatons, with but a fraction of a day’s earnings… and she does… she has so much free time to do as she pleases… and she uses some of that time to do what we did.

One woman from rural Poland, who died from smallpox in 1717 CE, a grandmother at 35: I knit roses and peonies into my and my children’s gloves… it wasn’t much extra work to dye the red, once I had already cleaned the wool and spun the yarn, and to knit in the designs… and I wasn’t a gifted knitter but I was a good knitter, and I thought, well, it might not make a difference to how warm the glove is, but it made the children happy and it made me happy. I liked to make things beautiful when I could.

Another woman, a peasant from what’s now France, who died from getting kicked by a mammoth in 8995 BCE: [Patting her on the back] I made my family’s clothes too. Every day my sister and I wove and wove and tended our children. We went out of our way to make the cloth lovely. Not a trace of it remains anywhere on earth now… But it mattered to us. And she might not know our names, or know it was us, but evidently, it matters to her too. She has so much beauty available to her, in every direction, and she wants to make it where we once made it.

[everyone sobbing and high-fiving each other.]

A man from Britain, 1104 CE, sitting at the trans-temporal telescope, reporting on my doings: She’s stopped knitting and now she’s playing minecraft.

The other ancestors: Ah, yes, the dream of building. We know this one well. What vision doth she design now?

Telescope man: Looks like… Some kind of floating temple?

my name is rakel, i am 21 and from sweden. i have just started a chemistry course at university, which is taking up most of my time. when i’m not studying, i like to read, sew, play instruments and sing in my choir.

A Day of Small Wins

Shower + full body scrub + skincare Wrap yourself in your softest clothes. Light a candle. Play a playlist that makes you feel powerful.

Laundry (at least start it, folding can wait)

Cook something simple, just enough to get by

Research work (at least 30–45 minutes, even if unfocused)

Call home (just get it done, no overthinking)

Afterward, give yourself thirty minutes of uninterrupted escape. Play a game altos Odessy

Journal for at least five minutes, even if it’s just venting

Take a night walk, if the weather allows Let the quiet settle in. The world feels different at night. When you return, make chamomile tea.