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#traaaaaaaaaaaaaa stories #wh40k #battle cry

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necromancelena

If you went to a bar and the bartender was a mousegirl you could ask for a drink and she would balance it on her head and say "for you, it's on the mouse"

megapope-deactivated20220531

the crazy thing about this is that it took one single word to turn it horny. coulda been a normal cute post. coulda taken the high road & conjured a delightful image of a mouse scampering down the bar with a beer ten times its size balanced on its head. but you had to say "mousegirl" and not "mouse." don't pretend this isn't what's going on either i know the score i know what's up. i'm familiar with this sort of semantic trick. you want to fuck down on an anime girl with certain characteristics of a rodent and everyone's gotta know.

basileater

>10 hours ago

>deactivated

agave

diamantefangs

xeansicemane

This is kinda ominous ngl

vexwerewolf

Gotta compliment him on his reflexes. No hesitation. Just described exactly what he was seeing, regardless of what it was.

wherefore-whinnies

[VD: A weatherman is giving a report and pointing to a map, saying "feel like temperatures really take a tumble too, because after the storm-" before he is interrupted by the screen going black and then displaying a picture of some baby spinach. He says, "um," then immediately points to the screen and confidently announces, "this is baby spinach." /End VD]

screampotato

Suddenly struck with a need to explain to you how boat pronouns work (I work in the marine industry).

When you're talking about the design of the boat, you say "it".

When the boat is still being built, your say "it".

When the boat is nearing completion, you can say "it" or "she".

When the boat is floating in the water you probably say "she", unless there is still a lot of work to be done (e.g. no engine yet) then you say "it".

When the boat is officially launched and operating, you say "she". If you continue to say "it" at this point you are not incorrect but suspiciously untraditional. You are not playing the game.

If you are referring to a boat you don't really know anything about you may say "it" ("there's a big boat, it's coming this way"). But if you know its name, it's probably "she" ("there's the Waverley, she's on her way to Greenock").

If you are talking about boats in general, you say "it" ("when a boat is hit by a wave it heels over")

If you speak about a boat in complimentary terms, it's "she" ("she's a grand boat"). If you are being disparaging it may be it, but not necessarily ("it's as ugly as sin", "she's a grotty old tub").

If she has a boy's name, she's still she. "Boy James", "King Edward", "Sir David Attenborough"? The pronoun is she.

If it's a dumb barge (no engine), you say it. But if it's a rowing boat (no engine), you say she.

I hope this has cleared things up so that you may not be in danger of misgendering floating objects.

glitched-out-mess

theramblingvoid

Hit "view post" and lost it

weaver-z

How the media depicts the Apollo 11 mission:

Actual quotes from the Apollo 11 mission:

georgieharrisons

also according to michael collins when the three of them were discussing what neil armstrong should say when he first stepped on the moon, collins suggested armstrong say “Oh, my God, what is that thing?” and then scream and cut out his mic.

little-scribblers-heart

Everyone forgets Michael Collins and it’s fucking tragic.

krakenartificer

Image 1: How the media depicts the Apollo 11 mission: A picture of the moon from close up, with the Apollo 11 Mission patch on the bottom left. Across the picture, in majestic-looking text, is “That’s one small step for man- One giant leap for mankind” - Neil A. Armstrong.

Actual Quotes from the Apollo 11 Mission: Image 2: Collins: I’d like to enter Aldrin in the oatmeal eating contest next time [Bruce McCandless, in Mission Control]: is he pretty good at that? Collins: He’s doing his share up here. McCandless: let’s see. You all just finished a meal not too long ago, too, didn’t you? Aldrin: I’m still eating. McCandless: Okay. Does that, that… Collins: He’s on his – he’s on his 19th bowl.

Image 3: Collins: Menkent. God, what a start. Aldrin: Nobody in their right… Collins: Mekent’s good … Aldrin: … nobody in their right mind would pick that one. Collins: … Mckent’s a good star.

Image 4: Collins: That’s a horrible window. It’s too bad we have to shoot through this one, but – oh, boy, you could spend a lifetime just geologizing that one crater alone, you know that? Armstrong: You could. Collins: That’s not how I’d like to spend my lifetime, but – picture that. Beautiful! Aldrin: Yes, there’s a big mother over here, too. Collins: Come on, now, Buzz, don’t refer to them as big mothers. Give them some scientific name.

Image 5: Collins: We’re trying to calculate how much spaghetti and meatballs we can get on board for Al Bean [the lunar-module pilot for Apollo 12]. Garriott: I’m not sure the spacecraft will take that much extra weight. Have you made any estimates? Collins: It’ll be close. Garriott: 11, Houston. The medics at the next console report that the shrew is one animal which can eat six times its own body weight every 24 hours. This may be a satisfactory baseline for your spaghetti calculations on Al Bean. Over. Collins: Okay. Thank you. That’s in work.

Image 6: [Fred Haise, in Mission Control]: Apollo 11, Houston. Collins: Go ahead. Haise: Roger, Mike. We recommend the left VHF antenna for VHF. Haise: And this is your friendly backup CMP. Have a good trip, and [garbled] remember to come in BEF [blunt end forward]. Collins: You better believe. Thank you kindly. Collins: We can see the moon passing by the window and it looks what I consider to be a correct size.

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visenyaism

Honestly fuck AI for making me have to go on and on defending the dignity of toil like I’m some kind of protestant

foxes-in-love

mewvore

"we detected a mature post" yeah I'm in my 30s

beemovieerotica

prettyinpinkcatgamer

carcuterie

thickness-protection-program

Why is this heat so hot 😩

fagapult

It’s the heat

thickness-protection-program

Source?

mamoswole

thickness-protection-program

pepsimansthickjuicymeatyschlong

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feedyourdeadnametothevoidfish

‘capitalism works’ factoid actually untrue. the 62 people who own half the world’s wealth are outliers and should be eaten.

anarchistmemedistro

62 8

technofeudalism

g00burr

Absolutely nuts how they made up a number for this satire post and the correction is that reality is *more absurd* than the number they chose

anarchistmemedistro

no i’m afraid it’s even worse than that. 62 was correct in 2016 when the original post was made.

homeboygirl

okay

blair-kamo

birdandmoon

Heat waves.

yellowcomics

Not For Puppies

support me on patreon!

ngk-they-said

This is one of those works of art that sticks with you forever. My partner and I first saw this comic years ago and quote the “okay, but like…” in our dogs’ voice several times a week.

thebaconsandwichofregret

I do love that every dog owner who has ever seen this just immediately goes “using that forever”

chaotic-error

@vocabulary-altering-posts ?

vocabulary-altering-posts

correct.

PHRASE ADDED!

“Okay, but like…what if it was for puppies.”

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alagaisia

Hey. Why isn’t the moon landing a national holiday in the US. Isn’t that fucked up? Does anyone else think that’s absurd?

alagaisia

It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! That’s a big deal! I’ve never thought about it before but now that I have, it’s ridiculous to me that that’s not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why don’t we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!

alagaisia

It’s July 20th. That’s the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. I’m ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and I’m going to have a goddamn potluck. You’re all invited.

watermelon-converse

Hey. Hey. Tumblr. Ides of March ppl. We can do this

emi--rose

Hell yeah moon holiday

hello-delicious-tea

Ooh coming up we should celebrate

ariaste

PITCH: We call it Moon Day, and then every 7 years when it falls on a Monday, that's an even BIGGER deal and we call that Moon Day Monday and go absolutely apeshit about it (the next Moon Day Monday is in 2026 so we have a couple trial runs first)

sarostheghostcat

MOON DAY MOON DAY MOON DAY

wafflebloggies

moon day is 20th July!!!

silly-jellyghoty

Scheduling this a day earlier to remind you all and myself about the Moon Day tomorow!

sashaforthewin

Happy moon day to all who celebrate

kitsuneofthemist

This is your reminder to prep for Moon Day on July 20th.

inkyrainstorms

MOON DAY MONDAY THIS MONTH NOT A DRILL!!!!!

rangerofthesouth

MY MOOTS I WILL BE MAKING ART BECAUSE THIS SHOULD BE AN INTERNATIONAL HOLIDAY THANK YOU VERY MUCH

WHO'S WITH ME FOR MOON DAY????

gayboy-baz

MOON DAY MONDAY

tarragonthedragon

i just got the "see where your blood has gone!" email from giving blood but it glitched and just showed me my current location. which. theyre not wrong. that is where most of my blood is

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