Heinous Princess of Undeath (✿^‿^)

maybe if i take the L and just go to sleep for a few hours this will be the time i wake up normal in a way that sticks

having control over my own body is really really scary because at any moment i could decide to sever all the tendons in my dominant hand on an emotional whim and fuck up my ability to do everything i like forever and i just have to think about that over and over and over again because i have to torture myself with the knowledge of how much damage i could do to myself all the time because im an idiot

It's a shame that all dentists are irredeemably evil people because i kind of like having teeth

Every time i walk out of my bedroom my hip or sometimes shoulder or arm hits this wooden shelf near the door and i can't tell if it's that i don't adapt to circumstances fast enough (still havent gotten used to there being a shelf there) or that i adapt to circumstances too fast (well i guess i will be bumping my hip into this shelf from now on)

last night crescent did a bit where it set its discord name and pfp to mine and started talking in a me impression and honestly i was exhausted, dissociative and checked out enough that i gave up on keeping track of which one of us is lena by like, minute 5.

Perhaps if i framed doing important and difficult stuff as a sort of "loser girl-> locked in girl" tf then even simple chores could become erotic. Trouble with that is "locked in girl->loser girl" tf is unambiguously hotter conceptually though.

couldn't find my headphones for a lot of today because i forgot that i fell asleep listening to horsefem asmr that i honestly didn't even like because my misophonia makes listening to asmr make me want to explode and die and also I had some creative and thematic differences with the writing but also i figured as far as "rolling the dice to see if i grow ears and a tail" goes falling asleep listening to that sort of thing seems on the upper list in terms of things that would cause that