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Sade Olutola
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
tumblr dot com
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occasionally subtle
$LAYYYTER
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

oozey mess

almost home

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@plusleandminuntherats
Don’t forget your daily clicks !!!

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In case anyone is having a bad night
(The best of this post and its reblogs, but with links that work)
Here is a website where you can scroll down to all the different levels of the ocean
Here is a website where you can see the future of the universe
Here is a website where you can press a ‘make everything okay’ button, over and over, until things really are okay
Here is a website that you can read if you feel like a burden
Here is a website where you can look at strobe illusions (TW strobe/flashing)
Here is a website where you can cut stuff up (TW blood/sh)
Here and here are websites where you can play with sand
Here is a website where you can draw with macaroni and other fun foods
Here is a website where you can paint someone’s nails
Here is a website where you can grow a garden with emojis
Here is a website with hundreds of videos of people hugging you (rightfully dubbed ‘the nicest place on the internet’ because it really is, y’all, it made me cry)
Here is a website that will take you to other useless websites
Here is a website where you can make a tiny cat play bongo drums (and other instruments!)
Here is a website to help give you gentle reminders <3
Here is a website where you can grow a tiny farm
Here is a website where you can take a bunch of scientific personality tests
Here is a website of calm rain noise
Take a breath. It’s going to be okay, I promise.
Reblogging thrice for effective reach
stretches my legs out so far with all toes spread out wide
HAPPY PRIDE MONTH HONEYS!👩🏾❤️💋👩🏾🏳️🌈✨

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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being anti-amatonormativity in a romance centered world is like watching half the people you know put all their eggs in one basket and then drop the basket and all their eggs break and they’re crying and swearing they’re never gonna do that again and then a month later they have all new eggs in a new basket and they tell you the problem was they didn’t have a strong enough basket or fresh enough eggs and then they drop the fucking basket again.
(this post is about putting all your time, energy, and care into one relationship, about staking all your happiness on a romantic relationship, effectively making the entirety of your joy and stability dependent on one person who could exit your life for any number of reasons no matter how great the relationship seems. it’s about the societal expectation to build your entire social life around one long term relationship, putting all your eggs in that basket, so to speak, instead of tending to larger social network and maintaining a variety of strong connections so that even if one very important relationship comes to an end, you won’t be losing your whole social life in one fell swoop.)
every since i learned that there was a feminist coalition between housewives, sex workers, and "others" (lesbians and presumably other queer people perceived female) i haven't really stopped thinking about it. we do not talk about this enough
from Revolting Prostitutes: The Fight for Sex Workers' Rights by Molly Smith and Juno Mac:
In the UK, the 1970s and 1980s sex workers’ rights movement was deeply entwined with the ‘wages for housework’ campaign. Marxist feminists named the value of women’s unpaid reproductive and domestic labour and demanded a radical reorganisation of society to value women’s work. Around that time, the feminist group Wages Due Lesbians linked domestic work, sex work, and the work of heterosexuality in a solidarity statement against a 1977 vice crackdown: ‘Wherever women succeed in winning some of the wages due us, it is a strength to all of us and proof that women’s services cannot be taken for granted’.
from Playing the Whore: The Work of Sex Work by Melissa Grant:
“Hookers and Housewives.” It’s hard now to conceive of these groups of women as class allies. Hookers and housewives, to speak in impossible generalities, are too often considered rivals (by those on the Left as much as by those on the Right), occupying opposite sides of one economic circle, two classes of women who earn their living from men’s waged work. Their labor, by contrast, is considered illegitimate. Caretaking and sex should be offered freely, we’re told, with genuine affection and out of love. A housewife maintains her legitimacy by not seeking a wage, and a hooker breaks with convention by demanding one. They are both diminished and confined by the same system that would keep women dependent on men for survival. And they could free themselves from that system together. As Margo St. James recalled in an interview (also from Carol Leigh’s archives), before she founded COYOTE in early 1973, there was WHO—Whores, Housewives, and Others. Others meant lesbians, “but it wasn’t being said out loud yet, even in liberal bohemian circles.” An early COYOTE supporter, anthropologist Jennifer James, coined the term “decriminalization” to express the movement’s goals of removing laws used to target prostitutes. The National Organization for Women (NOW), still very much in its Feminine Mystique era, adopted the decriminalization of prostitution as an official part of its platform later that year.
like. now THIS is feminism!!!!!
Y'all hear about this nuance stuff
I've heard mixed things.
Oh so it sucks then, and you hate it
I think about this all the time

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[ ID: Two tweets by Jay Hulme @ JayHulmePoet that read as follows,
People go off about transphobes not knowing any better because they're 'old' and today my 90 year old Grandad gifted me one of his fancy suit jackets, complimented my terrible beard, and continued his extremely wholesome habit of calling me "sonny me lad".
So. Yeah.
I spent years terrified of coming out to him because he was in his 80's at the time so I wrote him a letter like "I'm a man, Gramps" and he was so proud he showed the letter to his neighbors and phoned me and opened with "So how's my Grandson?" and has never got a pronoun wrong.
/end ID. ]
I was kicked out of my home by my abusive parents shortly after I turned 18. Out of my parents, the most actively antagonistic was my mother, who refused to even acknowledge that I was trans. A year after I was kicked out, I moved across the country nearer to the area where my mother's extended family was. A few days after I arrived, I received the news that my grandmother, my mother's mother, had passed. Too worried about addressing the issue to my relatives in their grief, I stayed away.
Eventually I worked up the nerve to visit them, mainly to see and console my grandfather, but also because I couldn't bear the thought of losing all of my family because of who I was. I hadn't intended to come out, but when my grandfather asked me about the rift between my parents and me I ended up sitting down and crying as I came out to my grandfather, my great aunt and two of my second cousins.
My grandfather is definitely very neurodivergent and didn't seem to entirely grasp the concept of me being transgender, but he still told me encouragingly that it was not his job to tell me what I should do with my body, and that he was proud of me. My cousins both held me and told me they thought I was brave and would support me no matter what.
But I will never forget what my 92 year old, very southern, very religious great aunt said to me that day. She took my hand and called me by name, as I wept, before she leaned over to me knowledgeably and went, "There were some people I knew as a girl who were- they were born girls, but in their hearts they were really boys. And you could tell from the way they moved and acted… but their families wanted them to be girls. But I have always known people like you, and they were made that way because God wanted them to be that way and be true to themselves.
"I have loved you since the moment I saw you and I will still love you! You are becoming who you are, and that's good, because God made you that way! You are happy and I am happy! I am glad to have a nephew! I love you!"
Anyone who says older people get a pass to be transphobic just because they're old is full of shit.
Anyway unfriendly reminder that Oslo University Hospital's gender clinic in Norway has, in the name of "reasonable concerns" about "the daughters of our nation"
Coerced youth clinic patients into filling out invasive, deeply uncomfortable research questionnaires while not making it clear whether these forms were research or diagnostic forms
Bypassed the privacy rights of 1700 patients to use their medical records for scientific publications without permission, despite having applied for permission and been denied it twice
Practiced sterilization of trans patients as a prerequisite to have their legal gender (read: gender marker on all ID documents) changed until 2016, still has not done anything to compensate the victims
Undermined efforts to establish regional clinics and pushed to minimize their ability to provide any kind of treatment, in an effort to guard their monopoly
Straight up implemented conversion therapy practices to try to dissuade patients from transitioning.
The clinic has the highest patient complaint rate of all branches at Oslo University Hospital, an impressive "achievement" given that they're treating a very small minority group.
This is what gatekeeping in trans healthcare looks like, so shut the fuck up about "but it's good to make sure the patient has actually thought it through tho" because that really is not what that term refers to.
via @swatercolor [insta]
This is the best tag I've ever received on a post, I think
Console buttons from Star Trek: The Original Series (1966-69)

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I needed to see this today.