i think you dont quite understand what real feminism strives to do. i think you might be a little confused by the name. real feminists understand that men are harmed by patriarchal expectations, we care for the toxicity men are forced to perform to fit in, we mourn the men who think the only way out is suicide.
we advocate for conversations about subjects taboo between men: testicular cancer, prostate problems, breast cancer. however women cant just forgive and forget the systematic violence that is inflicted on us every day. you cant blame them for being wary. but real feminists do care for you.
i think you dont quite understand what real feminism strives to do
I don't think you've considered how the definition of "real" feminism you have accepted came about, or taken the time to objectively ask why and how it deviates so wildly from all real world feminist activism in practice.
i think you might be a little confused by the name.
I think you might be a little confused about reality.
real feminists understand that men are harmed by patriarchal expectations
Patriarchy, at least in the sense you are using the word, is a feminist construct, and I'm not a feminist, so I don't accept the ideological framework from which you are starting out. Only people indoctrinated by feminism believe that all societies and civilizations around the world are part of a secret worldwide conspiracy set up to benefit all men through the exploitation and oppression of all women. Any person with a working brain and pair of eyes can look around their own life and realize this is not the case, and that there is no historical evidence of any kind of any point in history in which men suddenly "woke up" from the imaginary Matriarchy, like Ken in the Barbie movie, and decided to come together to wage war upon the female of the species.
"Men", as a class are not oppressing or brutalizing "women" as a class, and in fact such behaviour is very rare in any woman's day to day interactions in the western world, so to actually claim that western society, which feminists call a "patriarchy", should best be defined and categorized in this way is delusional and completely at odds with real life.
we care for the toxicity men are forced to perform to fit in
"Toxic Masculinity" is yet another uniquely feminist invention, and a particularly mean-spirited one, in that, as with the concept of "patriarchy", it simply blames "men" for everything bad that happens to any man, and so the only "help" or "care" it offers is to tell men it's collectively all "their" fault. Masculinity is not toxic, any more than femininity is toxic: both are simply names for recognizable traits seen in both sexes across all societies and periods of history.
we mourn the men who think the only way out is suicide.
I've never seen a feminist mourn for men who commit suicide. But I've literally seen hundreds and hundreds of feminists gleefully celebrate any and all men suffering and dying. There are thousands of examples of this on this very website, and, without exception, all of them are carried out exclusively by people identifying as feminist.
This itself should be enough to make you question your starting assumptions about the movement, because other people don't do that: it is only the teachings of feminist propaganda that makes people behave that way. So once again, the claims you are making here run entirely contrary to actual, empirical reality.
we advocate for conversations about subjects taboo between men: testicular cancer, prostate problems, breast cancer.
Feminists do literally nothing to actively help men in any real-world way at all, other than, as stated above, informing them that whatever is happening to them is collectively their own fault, and attempting to emasculate them by making them view and talk about themselves as women, because feminists refuse to accept that many sex differences in behaviour are the result of millions of years of evolution, rather than being "societal constructs". Because of this flaw in their worldview, even the most well-meaning of them are incapable of seeing men as anything but faulty women.
Here's an idea for you: men are around 80% of all suicides: if feminists really did care about this, and were "mourning" every man planning to take his life, they would simply offer to listen to men in need and help out in any way they can, with warmth and love and understanding, and without any ideological framing and indoctrination and victim blaming. Men are 80% of the homeless: If feminists really did care about men, they would organize at head office to go around feeding those men or taking them home and giving them a bath and a bed.
But feminists have never done this and will never do this. Because "feminist" is the word the world has for people who have been rendered incapable of caring for men.
women cant just forgive and forget the systematic violence that is inflicted on us every day.
You mean "systemic", but even so, there is no systemic OR systematic violence being "inflicted" on women every day in any western nation, and it's hysterical nonsense to claim such a thing. Women have more legal rights, privileges and special protections than men in every first world country, so once again the claims you are making here are actually the inverse of any objective appraisal of the facts.
real feminists do care for you.
Real feminists - the ones who teach gender studies classes, write feminist textbooks, organize feminist marches and slutwalks and are active in any meaningful way in the movement - don't care for me at all: they have, instead, been taught to hate and blame me for every real and imagined inconvenience they come across in their lives, even though they may have never met me or spoken to me. This is precisely the same way that the Nazis viewed and spoke about the Jews, and that is why I say feminism is a hate movement.