Weevil Mastermind

There should be a primate pollinator. Like a primate version of hummingbirds. Little tiny one-gram monkey with huuuuge eyes that lives off of syrup and hops from flower to flower etc

The only difference between a chud religion and a woke religion is whether or not said religion has the weight of the government or other powerful institutions behind it. No matter how beautiful and egalitarian and morally aspirational the original texts of a religion are, there is absolutely nothing stopping institutional actors from twisting those words to defend the powerful and demonize the powerless. Bitches in the U.S. will be like "Buddhism is such a peaceful religion, you never hear about Buddhist extremists" yeah of course YOU haven't heard of Buddhist extremists you couldn't find Myanmar on a map if your life depended on ir

If I keep practicing I might even be a person soon

I mean that’s sweet but he bit her goddamn finger off

yeah, but he was sowwy!

Man that probably sucks, trapped having the emotional maturity to recognize when they’ve permanently hurt someone but not the ability to understand in advance how to—oh wait humans do that too, it’s basically the classic human condition

What they don’t tell you about getting into bird watching is that once you get into it, you do not get to decide when you bird watch. You can be on the beach of some distant tropical country with nothing planned except relaxing. But then you see a Common Fluttering Nut Buster and you’re like fuckkkkkkkk holy shit guys the Common Fluttering Nut Buster is not supposed to live this far west holy shitttttttttt

The fossil record we're leaving behind from the anthropocene is gonna be so fucked

Digging up the UK in future millennia: temperate rainforest....glaciers.. temperate rainforest.. sudden disappearance of all trees. all megafauna gone. one billion sheep bones. asiatic deer. parrots. occasional macropod. giant redwoods. coati. hawaiian goose.

I'm so horny I could fuck a person I was attracted to #TRUE

3-5 turkey vultures will soon be dispatched to your location.