Malikbane

I cannot put into mortal words how fucking badly I want that swedish goat to burn. We live in a modern surveillance hellscape and not only is big brother watching you but he’s monitoring your purchase habits so he can sell you a smart refrigerator that will spy on you for the cia. the full weight of modern technology can be rallied to protect that straw monument to human hubris and I want us to burn it anyway. I want the might of modern society to crumple in the face of a drunk swede with a zippo lighter. we can do it just take my hand

One time I saw a fake headline about the Vatican announcing the virgin Mary's new nemesis, la puta Waría, and ever since that day I've quoted it like anybody else knows what I'm talking about

The implication that Jizz is just a local name on Tatooine is really funny though because I can imagine Luke huddled around a radio with a bunch of other rebels, hearing a song he likes, and going "oh turn it up I love jizz!" And all the other rebels just turning and staring at him.

Well at least this still mentions the planet orto which means ass or particularly anus in some spanish dialects. Small victories.

tbh my hot take is that a lot of people are obnoxiously weird about feet and its usually not the people that have foot fetishes

anyone who wears tanktops has an armpit fetish. anyone who wears shorts has a thigh fetish. anyone who doesnt wear gloves has a hand fetish. anyone who breathes has a choking fetish. i cant

I do think that the wiggles have the funniest backstory ever. Like oh to be a family-based pub rock band that makes fun but solidly middle of the road music about girls and young man troubles when one brother scoots off to school to become a preschool teacher and then he comes back and is like. Okay I just made two preschool teacher friends and what if I was a preschool teacher rock band with them. And his brothers said 👍okay. But there was another guy named Jeff who was not a preschool teacher and they said, wait. He could also be in the preschool teacher band. And since he doesn't know anything about being a preschool teacher he can just sleep on stage. 👍 and then they became the greatest children's music group of all time

Literally the only thing that would be necessary to update those 1990s animes about a couple of dumbfuck women going around causing problems on purpose for the modern era is not giving them token boyfriends to counter the yuri allegations. It's the only genre where the sole needed improvement is a subtraction.

"Okay, but sometimes the token male love interest's presence is material to the plot" I have a suggestion.

Do you think there are any redpilled hard-right incels out there hooking up with each other to solve their mutual loneliness and blaming it on women refusing to fuck them. Like whether they’re gay or not is immaterial because they just go “uuuurgh men just have NEEDS, what are we SUPPOSED to do, WOMEN won’t fuck us, we Have to, it’s not GAY it’s NATURAL ALPHA INSTINCTS”. Like in Ancient Greece

As a feminist I am horrified but as a scholar I am fascinated

reading the wiki for the american psycho movie every single thing it’s saying about christian bale has me in tears …….. he literally wanted the role so bad he got that buff in two weeks, rejected every other offer for 9 months while the producers tried to get dicaprio to be patrick bateman bc bale knew dicaprio would chicken out, went to dinner with the director and the guy who wrote the novel IN CHARACTER apparently scaring the shit out of the novelist, took the role for $50k, and then made all his costars think he was a giant freak bc he never fucking broke character, and APARENTLY LITERALLY HAS CONTROL OVER HIS SWEAT GLANDS AND USED THIS IN THE BUSINESS CARD SCENE

It brings me comfort that, for a brief moment, Jared Leto genuinely believed Christian Bale was going to kill him with an axe