the only way out is strewn
New ep out on Bandcamp and streaming!
28 minutes of atmospheric drones, isolated spaces, and decaying memories
Also on Spotify (and a dozen other places)
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@aholefilledwithtwigs
the only way out is strewn
New ep out on Bandcamp and streaming!
28 minutes of atmospheric drones, isolated spaces, and decaying memories
Also on Spotify (and a dozen other places)

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Watched a documentary about abuse and advice one guy said to give children was, "Tell them that if someone is hurting them, to tell someone - and don't just tell one person. Tell as many people as possible, and keep telling as many people as possible until the abuse stops." and i really liked that
Bc so many ppl focus on the idea of telling A Trusted Adult, but even a well-meaning individual can fuck up and let abuse fall through the cracks or not know what to do
Whereas if a child tells LOADS of adults AND other kids, there's far less opportunity for an abuser to do damage control
Consistently telling their story and spreading it around disempowers the abuser to control and coerce the flow of information, or to utilise gaps and weaknesses in systems of reporting or welfare to isolate the child
Just really good advice. Not suprised I don't hear it more often.
Because I'm a biologist and a complete freak, I sometimes amuse myself thinking about like a super ultra advanced alien race that 'conquers' our planet, but instead of being all 'War of the Worlds' about it, they aren't even conquering, as far as they're concerned. There are no inteligent life forms on this planet, after all, just little animals, and they're clearly on the endangered species list. A perfect place to study rare wildlife on an untouched planet.
So there's an alien research station in space. Humanity's worst attempts to destroy it amount to a bear turning over the trash can. Aliens occasionally abduct people and return them with a clean bill of health and an ankle bracelet. It takes them forever to figure out those bracelets are screwing with their data because humans who carry them are curve-wreckingly popular.
Disaster strikes somewhere, I dunno, Japan, and there's an uptick in abductions, but of people stuck in collapsed buildings, and yeah the giant octopus tree that looks straight out of Call of Cthulhu is scary but it's also using tech you can't even comprehend to find survivors and teleport them out of the rubble. You see humans with absolutely 100% deadly injuries wisked away and a good number of them even return. There is now a new consent form specifying if rescuers can take you to the aliens, because they will probably try to save you but if they can't your family will never get your body back. You decide if your life or your body is more important.
Little by little, pragmatism wins out. The aliens aren't attacking, but they ARE abducting and doing weird tests. But the survivors mostly return unharmed with a Big Mac in hand and a weird piece of tech. There have been less valid excuses to miss school. The aliens are clearly researching humanity just as much as we are researching them, and until communications are established this status quo isn't the worst.
Ofc, then one of them actually attacks. Knocks the statue of liberty clean off. The military starts to deploy fast, and even wounds the attacker a lot, but before they can shoot the second missle it bounces. And it turns on the shooter. Every military person in the attack dies, suddenly and through means you cannot comprehend. The other aliens whisk the attacking one away. Construction materials appear as if in apology, but that's it.
The attacker was a hooligan who thought destroying wildlife was fun, and ran into something they can't handle. But even if the bear is perfectly within its rights to defend its territory, the ranger will atill have to shoot it to save the stupid brat, and hope the idiot learned their lesson.
But the bear is still dead. And the forest critters who had just started getting used to the ranger are now having second thoughts.
But the abductions continue. There are no hooligans for a while. And what else can you do? This is your home, but if the invaders really want to take it, what can you do?
So you try to stay out of their way, if you are in some serious trouble and your chances are already less than 50/50, maybe you seek them out. Sometimes they help. Sometimes they don't.
And sometimes the abductees catch glimpses of something that looks like it might have been human once, but eyes and skin all wrong, speaking incomprehensibly, and rubbing its head on the alien's 'knees'.
You go home to your dog and try not to think about it.
THE REVIEWS ARE IN!
And now let me bliw your mind: Alien equivalent of Steve Irwin, the one madman brave enough to go bother human wildlife in Australia.
ten-foot octopus tree holding me by the scruff of my neck after plucking me from my car:
ç̷͙̞͓̳͙̭͖̞͇̝̓̎̎͛͗̿̃̏̒̑͝r̸͇̠̲̩̩̟̞̥̫̗̞̟͇̭̼͉̈͗̔̑̓̿̓̕͜ȉ̶̧̛̛̩͔̠͖̝͎̘̝͔̖̜̅̆͆̌͊̑͂͒͠ͅk̵̰̟͋̋̈̈͗ę̴̹̟͓͎̖̑̈́̎̕͠ȳ̴̛͇̯̝̲̠̼̮̯͗͛̏́̔͜͜ ̷̼̳̰͖̃̅̈́͐̿́̂͝w̶̨̬͚̝̦͖̟̱̉̌͐̿͆̀̀̿̅̿͌̃̚͜h̶͈̪̰͈͎̍͂̕a̶̢̝̳̠̓͐̈́͐̆̀̽̀̎̾̑͝ͅţ̶̹̣͙͚̬̩̥͌̉͋̽̄̊̚ ̷̗̠̩̻̮̞̒̈́̏̿̏̌̈́͑̒͑́͘͜͝ͅå̵̡̧͔͚̖̜̦̬̥̻̭̂́̀̓̍͛̄͐̃͆̕̚͝͝ ̴̡̨̤̰̺̻̪̞̬̼͛̈͠b̶̛̛̻̳̫͙̩̪̲̲̫̱͉̺̂͊̉̅̓̎́̽̾̈̊̉̈́̕͠ͅe̷̢̲̣̻̝̯͙͔̜̭̻͕͛̓a̷̖͓̥̯̝̥̙̺̥̺̫̹͛̀͆̎̋̊̒̅̚̕͝u̷̻̟̣͕̪͍͇̼̭̜̝̲̞͓̗̽̈́̅̈́̂̇̒͠ͅt̴̘̩͎͓̰͍́̐̂̂́̂͗̒̏̑̀̈̓͊̚͝y̵̛̠͉̠̲̥͋͌́̀͆ ̵̨͍͈̳͕̱͋͗͌́̔̾̽̄͆́̇
hey, i’m so glad that your nerve block went well! chronic pain can be an absolute hellish beast to live with… i don’t know if this is something they offer in the states, but have you ever considered getting a nerve ablation? more commonly done with heat (radiofrequency ablation) but can also be done using extreme cold (cryoneurolysis). here you’re able to get out on a (VERY long) waitlist for an outpatient pain clinic, and once the time comes an anesthesiologist conducts the procedure. results are fairly long lasting, and if you’re very lucky at a certain point the nerve may not grow back, meaning that you wouldn’t have to return for treatment! pls ignore if this is something you’re aware of/have considered, i don’t know your whole story so sorry if i’m being annoying.
Thanks! I have honestly not done a ton of research into this— i’ve heard of nerve ablation, but haven’t looked into it as an option. I have gotten the impression that my insurance wants me to try every treatment in order of invasiveness (trigger points happened before nerve block, meds before trigger point, etc)
So i am hoping i get through to the full nerve block, and hope that lasts a long time (but i should) look into ablation 👀)
Later today i am getting a diagnostic injection to figure out the exact nerve they need to block and what i have to do is report how much relief i get during the first 6-12 hours (after which it wears off) which means i have to spend today inside my body which is annoying
Lol yea i minimized that. That was just surgery
Went good
Good thing is it seems like i am a good candidate for a nerve block. Annoying thing is that this is a test run, and will only last 6-12 hours. Annoyinger thing is that insurance requires we go through this test twice before doing the real deal
I also don’t like sedation and am allergic to the best working anti inflammatory so right now i am in the strange zone where my nerve pain is gone (amazing) but my tissue is angry
Oh and now i know the feel/sound/vibration of someone taking about six tries to get a needle snaking around a vertebrae (it’s a distinct click not unlike a pop of a joint)
Figured out why they don’t use mycharts— not the same fucking hospital. They named themselves like part of the hospital, is owned by doctors from the hospital, is in the same building as parts of the hospital, but is in fact a private practice. Which meant they didn’t have full medical records for me, so i had to go over my stuff in detail repeatedly (like my allergy and insides made of crepe paper)
And the doctor who did the treatment is same one who did my trigger point injections, as part of the hospital, one floor down

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Later today i am getting a diagnostic injection to figure out the exact nerve they need to block and what i have to do is report how much relief i get during the first 6-12 hours (after which it wears off) which means i have to spend today inside my body which is annoying
Lol yea i minimized that. That was just surgery
Went good
Good thing is it seems like i am a good candidate for a nerve block. Annoying thing is that this is a test run, and will only last 6-12 hours. Annoyinger thing is that insurance requires we go through this test twice before doing the real deal
I also don’t like sedation and am allergic to the best working anti inflammatory so right now i am in the strange zone where my nerve pain is gone (amazing) but my tissue is angry
Oh and now i know the feel/sound/vibration of someone taking about six tries to get a needle snaking around a vertebrae (it’s a distinct click not unlike a pop of a joint)
Later today i am getting a diagnostic injection to figure out the exact nerve they need to block and what i have to do is report how much relief i get during the first 6-12 hours (after which it wears off) which means i have to spend today inside my body which is annoying
Lol yea i minimized that. That was just surgery
Went good
Which one of you works at nat geo
Which one of you works at nat geo
Tiny pale pink sun in a rose sky

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Later today i am getting a diagnostic injection to figure out the exact nerve they need to block and what i have to do is report how much relief i get during the first 6-12 hours (after which it wears off) which means i have to spend today inside my body which is annoying
Opening uber to check when i should request my uber knowing full well that checking, waiting, and then checking always results in a higher rate
I did debate walking— i normally would but
which at the same time could be kinda funny because i’m on my way to get vascular imaging so i could really give them a fun show
I know the point of this appointment was to establish a baseline so we have some concrete numbers to compare to in the future but was so underwhelming
The appointment said 1.5 hours. Took 10 minutes. All i got from the tech was that i was ‘mild’ and just under the threshold for additional tests. Which is good! But also it would be kinda cool to find something specific
I think i’m also somewhat nervous about to tomorrow’s appointment (it will be fine though)
It’s manifesting in dumb ways, like me second guessing my pain (real)
Hmmm still avoiding it clearly because it’s not an appointment it’s an outpatient procedure. When i got trigger point injections they did it in office. This is scheduled for the ambulatory surgery (the name doesn’t help), who don’t schedule using mychart so i have no print or digital record of the procedure, just a voicemail. It is one floor up. Part of the same hospital. Completely separate patient and billing tools
Also nervous because my friend is flying back right now and fighting delays and not sure if she’ll be in tonight or tomorrow morning (want her home safe)
Fucked up my circadian rhythm with my cicadian and i just slept 17 years
(You guys get real title while youtube gets baby title)
Opening uber to check when i should request my uber knowing full well that checking, waiting, and then checking always results in a higher rate
I did debate walking— i normally would but
which at the same time could be kinda funny because i’m on my way to get vascular imaging so i could really give them a fun show
I know the point of this appointment was to establish a baseline so we have some concrete numbers to compare to in the future but was so underwhelming
The appointment said 1.5 hours. Took 10 minutes. All i got from the tech was that i was ‘mild’ and just under the threshold for additional tests. Which is good! But also it would be kinda cool to find something specific
Chol Mabior at Robert Wun Couture FW 2026

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Probably in denial about a number of things but one that looms large on the periphery is that i don’t think i can eat french fries anymore
it's crazy there's a band as good as death grips and their fans aren't evil in a pretentious way but evil in the way they seriously undervalue the art
i make this post like every month and it never gets reblogged but it is now so i want to be clear this is because of racism. the death grips fans who can't interact with the music/art/stefan burnett's image sincerely are being racist