Why did I make this?

sherlock holmes deduces you are trans before you've figured it out yourself and refers to you with those pronouns and then when you look confused is like "ah...had you not arrived at that conclusion yet?" and wafts away in his dressing gown to smoke seventeen pipes, leaving you in a gender crisis

Hercule Poirot deduces you are trans by accident because he suspected you of murder and broke into your house and searched your stuff then puts 2 and 2 together when Hastings makes an innocuous observation about your fashion sense or something and he jumps up and cries “mon dieu!!!” before striding over to you kissing you on both cheeks and saying “ah, cher ami, you must live as you choose!” and then running off to confront the real culprit while you stand there in befuddlement

Columbo deduces you're trans from context clues while he's talking to you about the area, immediately uses your preferred pronouns and starts telling you about his cousin, who's also transgender, and how they got this job doing security, and how they told him that a security guard always locks up, and asks you if the guard locked up last night, and isn't it weird the place was open? And you're like, well, someone else must have opened it up. Maybe the guy in charge? He has a spare key. And then he nods and goes "the guy in charge has a spare key... well, how about that?" And then he offers you a cigar and wanders off, and a day later your boss gets arrested for murder.

Fanon Batman deduces you are trans and suddenly a free hormone clinic opens up by your home a couple months later

Miss Fisher learns youre trans and simply gives you hormones, and a little cocaine as a treat. she also invites you out to a club to meet like minded individuals. at the club you watch as she seduces the bartender and then the next day the bartender is arrested for the murder.

wanna hang out [remembers it's rude to put expectations on people] it's cool if not [remembers people like to know they're wanted] but I'd really like it if you did [remembers selfishness is bad] we can do whatever you want though [remembers that handing someone a blank canvas isn't as effective as providing a suggestion to bounce ideas off of] like sucking each others fingers for example

its a crime more people don't know about the silt verses. Happy pride to the grizzled, Irish, middle aged, aro-ace, every gods favorite, impossible to kill, mass murderer, manipulative woman known as Carpenter

this post blew the fuck up oh my god. Happy pride also to the tgirl business woman who started a massive cult on on her own and was consumed by it, and happy pride to the trans man who rose the ranks in his own pre established cult only to also be consumed by it. They're all fucked forever but at least they're queer 🎉

hate it when you see something in media that has great kink potential so you skedoodle post-haste to ao3 only to discover there's none fic left beef and then you have to sit there going oh I see I'M the pervert weirdo I'M the problem with society and everyone else in the world is going to heaven with a hundred innocence dollars preloaded onto their ole fashioned wholesome funtimes themepark fast pass card like fuckin oath man

okay. how do I put this. if you approach interactions with strangers as if the vast majority of them are unbearable losers who aren't worth your time, you will find yourself not liking most of the people you meet because you'll be looking for any excuse to write them off as unbearable losers. I know this is hard to hear but sometimes the problem is you.

you'll also find it a self-fulfilling prophecy, because people can usually tell when you think they are stupid and annoying, and will react by closing off and tucking away everything they care about before you can judge them for it. if you find people very very boring it might be that they are simply hiding from you.

I seem to be living a very expensive lifestyle called eating food regularly

good morning to the beaten and the damned only

long distance friends pets feel like celebrities because you can only be parasocial with them