Assorted Insanity

“Dick, no,” Wally hissed.

“Dick, yes.”

All of them turned to look at Raven in surprise. She just shrugged and gestured towards the new hero, Phantom. He was talking with Specter. She said something that made him throw his head back in laughter. It showed off his sharp teeth spectacularly.

“Someone needs to… what was the phrase for it?” Raven asked, head tilted. “Ah, ‘hit that’.”

“Raven,” Wally gasped, aghast.

She gestured again at Phantom. His his drifted away like smoke and his legs were less than solid. He felt like storm about to break.

“Yeah, no, I’m with Raven,” Gar said. His chin was perched on his hand as he watched Phantom with what was basically heart eyes. “Unless he’s into sharing?”

“Oh come on, you have to at least let me shoot my shot!” Dick whined. “You two already have your whole eldritch thing. Leave some for the rest of us.”

“Dick, no,” Wally said, again. “I’m just trying to keep you in one piece.”

Dick pressed his hands together with a little gesture. “Counterpoint: he makes falling apart seem so good.”

“So... We got the exploding diarrhea. Here's my advice for anyone who doesn't have it yet:

It's going to take a minute for the government to pin down where this is coming from, and then issue a recall, because the FDA has been gutted. But, I can tell you, without a shadow of a doubt : this is coming from Taylor Farms produce, and you will see them recalled.

You'll want to avoid all Taylor Farms produce in the grocery store. They supply McDonalds, KFC, Pizza Hut, about any fast food place you can think of.

Raspberries, watermelons, cilantro, and the veggies you're hearing about are not causing this many people to get sick. It's the shredded lettuce, specifically, that's the problem. But, you'll want to stay away from every type of produce this company puts out, because one strand of shredded lettuce is all it takes to contaminate bushels.

Taylor Farms is the source. Taco Bell proactively pulled their produce from their restaurants. You're going to see other fast food places doing this, and probably will see that before the government names a source. The FDA knows this, but they can't come out and tell us all until there's proof, which takes resources and research, which takes manpower, but the FDA has been cut by about 20-30%

During the Biden term, onions at McDonald's had ecoli. We knew this because DNA testing was done quickly and they were able to narrow it down to one place that caused the outbreak. And, it was traced back to Taylor Farms. This isn't going to be solved as quickly though.

When you get this, make a virtual appointment to your PCP - a "same day sick" appointment. Tell them someone in your family just tested for this and was positive and was prescribed Bactrim. If you go in person, they're probably going to make you poop in a cup and wait until results come back to prescribe.

You'll know when you get this. Trust me on all of this.

You'll want to stay hydrated because this parasite damages the lining of the small intestine. Your small intestine, in turn, secretes more water into the gut, and less nutrients and liquid are able to remain in the body. So no matter how much you shit, you're going to want to drink. A day of this leads to dehydration if you don't increase your fluid intake, and a few days will land you in the hospital.

If you have headaches, weakness, muscle cramps, dizziness, or an increase heart rate - hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. Go to the ER for fluids if you can't drink enough.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk. Brought to you by America's 250 birthday celebrations, workforce reduction in the FDA and CDC, and viewers like you.

Please feel free to share this.

And, MAGA - don't blow up the comment section. I argued with y'all on COVID bc I was afraid y'all would die, but I really don't care if you get explosive diarrhea.

Hello

So I’ve been binging a bunch of DPxDC crossover fics cause they’re hella fun. And I wanted to make some fanart for a handful of the fics I’ve been reading just to show how vastly different Danny gets portrayed. It’s really fun!! I love when ppl make Danny get Jack’s tall ass gene’s, but it’s also funny to see him as a scrawny lil guy. He’s a pretty moldable character

Anywho, it’s just been fun, so here’s some fanart. Thanks to the authors for writing them 🙏

Fics in order of art:

Like Beta Fish Do by @clockwayswrites

Ghost in the Morgue by @the-witchhunter

Secretary Danny by DeathlySilent13

If You Give a Bat a Burger by @noir-renard

From ancient to abstract, this one sure got around.

Don’t drop the soap.” We’ve all heard it. It’s been said in so many movies, TV shows, and comedy skits that mention prison. Before I was incarcerated, everything I knew about prison was from movies like The Shawshank Redemption and Half Baked, which sent a clear message: that prison is filled with sexually deviant “predators” and, if you’re not careful, you’re guaranteed to be sexually harassed and assaulted.

I arrived tense and prepared for violence at the slightest provocation. I saw fights, heard about occasional stabbings and other forms of violence, but, unlike what the movies depicted, sexual violence was not the norm in prison. After spending almost two decades in the Illinois prison system, across seven penitentiaries, I’ve seen these jokes’ harmful inaccuracy. “Don’t drop the soap” has taken on an entirely different meaning: I ended up being more concerned about my bar soap falling on the grimy bathroom floors since each one costs between $1.50 and $3—a lot when you can only make cents on the hour. 

Media and dialogue surrounding the prison environment continue to force the misconception that individuals in custody are wantonly depraved compared to the rest of society. These normalized depictions don’t just make light of the real impacts of sexual violence—they minimize the role prison staff play in both perpetrating and encouraging the violence that does take place. Staff are often relegated to the margins of conversations surrounding prison culture when they are in fact central to the story: Their positions of power allow them to commit or instigate harm while shielding them from scrutiny, redirecting attention to the criminalized population.

After a few weeks of living with a cellmate at Hill Correctional Center in 2015, he and I started to butt heads over trivial things like cleanliness and conflicting personalities. Spending nearly 20 hours together each day, we didn’t want it to get worse, so we informed a corrections officer of our growing tension and our need to be separated. “Hey, y’all are grown,” the officer responded. “If you can’t get along, I’m not getting involved. Learn to fight or fuck.”

My blood began to boil, heat rising to my face until I began swearing at the officer. He laughed as he walked away, yelling over his shoulder, “Fight or fuck, makes no difference to me!” My cellmate and I ended up fighting for days before coming to terms. We eventually realized fighting was exactly what the officer wanted us to do. Prison isn’t the safest place in the world, but staff comments like this play a role in encouraging our victimization. 

And it goes beyond provocation: Corrections officers themselves are often the perpetrators of this sexual harassment and violence. Data shows that sexual violence in men’s prisons isn’t a regular occurrence. And when it does happen, the staff are far from innocent actors. According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics’ National Prison Rape Statistics Program, from 2023 to 2024, in state and federal prisons across the country, just over 2 percent of adult inmates reported sexual victimization by another prisoner, and roughly the same percent reported sexual victimization by facility staff.

Even one incident of sexual violence, whether by an inmate or staff member, is one too many. I know from experience that the trauma and harm associated with abuse are long-standing and incalculable. I entered the Illinois Youth Center St. Charles when I was 16. Early in the first summer I was there, we would all shower after our softball games—and a staff member would watch us and make sexually explicit comments while making gestures toward his groin. He never touched me, but he made me feel powerless. I ended up reporting him after two months of this, and I never saw him again. I’m not sure exactly what happened to him, if he was fired or moved facilities, but that experience has stuck with me.

Abuse can show itself in many forms that may feel confusing at the time. When I was still 16, a woman corrections officer would come through on the midnight shifts. She would joke and “flirt” with the kids there, bringing us cigarettes. Eventually, she made sexual advances at me, touching and kissing me. At the time, it felt cool to get attention from an older woman, and I felt so conflicted about whether or not I should report it, so I never did. I know now that it was abuse: Both her and the other corrections officer took advantage of someone at their mercy, and the trauma of both experiences is deeply rooted. To date, more than 900 survivors have come forward alleging they too suffered child sexual abuse at juvenile detention centers in Illinois between 1995 and 2022.

It is fair to assume that the actual numbers are higher and would continue to show staff as key figures in carceral victimization, as many children and adults suffer in silence, afraid to speak out. All the while, the conception abounds that we are more often victimizing each other. 

Minimizing the role that those in positions of power play in condoning, ignoring, or committing acts of harm reduces accountability and creates more space for such acts to occur. And, as we see time and again, victims of abuse can sometimes be too afraid or embarrassed to speak up or really understand the dynamics at play.

which combined with ilya loving just making things up and saying them (as seen in the "yes, the rumors are true-" scene) offers the very funny idea that ilya actively tries to offer as much privacy as possible by just throwing out stories about them at random so there IS no central story for people to hound shane about.

assorted backstories a la "ilya just started talking and found out with everyone else where he was going with this":

they got snowed in at all stars one year (b-but wasn't that year in florida?) and decided there was nothing better to do

it started as a bit and neither is willing to give up first

they paired off to combine forces like nato

they paired off to limit how many kids they could have in the future to make sure hockey stayed fair

ilya lost a bet six years ago

shane lost a bet three years ago

ilya got tired of remembering phone numbers for his hookups and shane's is easy

ilya got tired of having to look things up in english and french when talking to other people and decide to marry someone who speaks two languages to save time

shane is gifted enough (wink wink wink) that other people are cowards and only ilya was brave enough to rise to the challenge (this one gets him in trouble on the phone later but it also gets him laid that night at home and also confuses the online speculation about who tops and bottoms, so net positive tbh)

yuna hollander is the best manager in the business and a political marriage was the best way to secure her services longterm

the reporter obviously knows he's not serious (...mostly) but plays along with "what kids?" and ilya just ☝️ as he pulls out his phone and starts looking through, and everyone is like "surely not...bUT WHAT IF", and then he goes "ah! here", and holds out his phone

and it's a picture of anya and luca haas