trying.

it's always two distinguished gentlemen saying precisely to each other

a neutral reminder that while being a hater can be a fun indulgence you can never find long term happiness by spending your time constantly hating on things and you can’t make long term friends if the only thing you have in common is something you both dislike; you need to love and be passionate about things. being petty gets old. you need to be a lover too

hey.. two people were asking about you… so i gave them your address and phone number… their names were Skeletal Warrior and Skeletal Ice Mage

rachel berry is the funniest person to ever exist because who else would triple cast their boyfriend, ex boyfriend and ex sorta boyfriend as her one boyfriend in an overdirected music video to an objectively ass 70s song, shooting the entire thing three times so none of them know the other guys are involved, getting mad when none of them understand her artistic process of trying to be seen as a bad girl and then 5 minutes later kelly clarksoning total eclipse of the heart

i have been informed by literally every french speaker on earth that “une pipe” is slang for blowjob

not to be vague but.

You wouldn’t think it but actually in my experience knitting and crochet are perfect for Meausre Once Cut Also Once No Prablem bitches. I cannot un-cut a piece of wood or erase a pen mark, but I can frog any number of stitches. I get so much knitting per inch of yarn. It’s downright economical when you think about it.

a book should be $5 a little drink should be $2 and museum access should be free and all hours

If I keep practicing I might even be a person soon