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The actual director is Natted JWHJ0715, and they deserve credit!!!

hey did somebody mention Trafalgar D. Water Law, my favorite character of all time?

Trafalgar Law my emo edgelord baby who had 'DEATH' tattooed on his knuckles when he was a 14 year old but somehow doesn't regret that as an adult? Trafalgar Law who tried to pass off Punk Hazard as his 'summer home' when the Marines came knocking? Trafalgar Law who said "it's really important that we stay undercover in Wano" and then had his Jolly Roger embroidered onto his kimono like the enormous dork that he is?

Trafalgar Law who has one of the most tragic backstories in One Piece, a series known for giving characters tragic backstories? Trafalgar Law who has incredible survivor's guilt and spent half his life trying to fulfill the last wishes of the man who showed him kindness and saved his life? Trafalgar Law who is an incredibly cool and confident pirate captain but also a soggy wet cat? Trafalgar Law who has the "fuck you in particular, I do what I want" Devil Fruit?

Are we talking about Trafalgar Law who is a brilliant strategist, and also is constantly the most long-suffering man alive because he is surrounded by clowns? Trafalgar Law who just fucking gave up and let Luffy tote him around like a sack of potatoes for half of Dressrosa? Trafalgar Law who has a submarine? Trafalgar Law who loves his crew so so so so very much? Trafalgar Law who is a captain and a doctor and a swordsman (other pirate captains could never). Trafalgar Law who would absolutely mainline Monster Energy in a modern AU but forbid his crew from drinking it?

Trafalgar Law who carves people's hearts out of their chests and then swaps them around without telling anyone? Trafalgar Law who can make souls bodyswap and definitely does that for fun sometimes or just to annoy people? Trafalgar Law whose first mate is a polar bear?

Did somebody ask about Trafalgar Law, who has been my laptop wallpaper for the past [redacted] years? Who I actually thought about getting a vanity plate for but couldn't quite justify the money even though I really really want a vanity plate that reads TORA-O?

Unless.

You consider that the Metros know that Shane absolutely does know how to fight. They've all done checking clinics with Shane. They've all wrestled and roughhoused with Shane. He's strong and he's fast and he wants to win.

The Metros understand that Shane doesn't fight, not because he can't, but because he's a little too good at it. And Shane generally doesn't even like violence. He likes to win by playing the game, not hurting the other team.

they start talking to a human and the human is like "haha yeah that's a crow!" and the alien researcher is like "you called it a 'bird' earlier, is that a different name?" and the human is like "oh a crow is just one species of bird, there's like, 10 others out there"

"On this planet?"

On Earth, the inhabitants are just. Playing and walking LITERALLY STEPPING ON CARPETS OF ORGANISMS the whole time. the aliens are like "it doesn't hurt them??? Can't you just...move them to a place where you don't have to step on them?" and the humans are like "no of course not, grasses evolved to tolerate being stepped on, and besides, more plants would grow there if we tried to move the existing ones"

Alien: I don't understand...why would you not place the solar farms in an area of the planet with no existing ecosystem?

Human: ...what?

Alien: You have rather sophisticated protective gear and have done some space exploration, surely you could establish them in an area of the planet to which life is not yet adapted?

Human: ...there isn't one.

"I don't think you understand what I'm saying. Only 25% of Earth's species have been formally described, at most."

"that's...that's most of them."

"Yes?"

"Well...I suppose the ocean trenches and abyssal plains must be difficult for you to reach...where did you have to travel for your discoveries?"

"Wait. I believe this is something your language refers to as needing 'unpacking.' The current biodiversity represents a historical low point?"

"Well, a local minimum, as the math people say. But yeah, I think there was some recovery after the Younger Dryas about ten thousand years ago, but for every new species humanity creates intentionally or unintentionally, tens or hundreds have been wiped out. We're not proud of this."

"We will need time to digest this, to the point I'm afraid to ask the next question: NEXT great extinction?"

"Yeah, I forget how many there've been total, and there's some arguing over how bad it has to get before it really counts. A comet or meteor strike 65 million years ago wiped out the majority of life...the majority of species or even genera...there's entire classes of life we didn't know ever existed until we found their fossils a few hundred years ago. And then there's the Permian, when a good chunk of a continent erupted and I think we lost...ninety percent of all species? Maybe more? I'd have to look it up. There was also a mass extinction that just happened because all the continents got pushed together and apparently that was bad for life on land and in the sea. You're looking a little faint...do you need to sit down?"

"But...even a single great extinction has always meant the end of life above the unicellular level, on every world we've visited. This planet has evolved complex incredibly ramified life repeatedly despite three mass extinction events?"

Lily, looking at the church: What is this?

Sebastian: This is the church where someone named God lives.

Lily: Who's God?

Sebastian: It's a bit confusing. God is a shepherd.

Mopple: So he could be our shepherd.

Sebastian: No, because he's also a lamb.

Lily: What?

Sebastian: And he's also invisible. And he's made of bread. And he damns things.

Lily: Dams things? Like a beaver?

Sebastian: Yes.

Lily: So God is a big, invisible lamb-beaver made of bread?

Sebastian: Yes. And they eat him on Sundays.

"Make sure you crimp the edges closed. It needs to be sealed tight. We don't want any leakage!"

It was Pie-Making Day at the Pike's. Jackie thought it would be a great way to use up all the fruits their trees produced over the summer. So she took Shane, Ilya and Hayden through it step-by-step, carefully observing as they assembled a pie each.

"Easy as pie! You're getting the hang of it," Jackie said. "Then you just rinse and repeat. So, shall I leave you boys to it?"

Hayden replied, "Don't worry, baby, we got this!"

"Thank you. I'll be over there with the girls, honey bun," she said before she left them.

Honey bun, Ilya mouthed to Shane. He and Shane were sharing the same amused look on their faces.

Once Jackie was out of earshot, Ilya asked Hayden, "Can you pass the flour, sugar plum?" This got a snort from Shane.

Hayden sighed. "Real mature guys," he said before he handed Ilya the bag of flour. "Here."

Ilya grinned wide at Shane, who matched it with his own mischievous smile.

"Thanks," Ilya said. "Ok. I am ready for next step."

"Then, you need to brush the top with some egg wash," Hayden told him.

Ilya nodded and said, "Ah. Eggs are on your right, jelly bean." Shane made a sound from his throat but he closed his mouth before the noise could escape him.

"Dude, stop." Hayden's jaw clenched. But Ilya's smirk just deepened.

"What is wrong, butter cup?" Ilya asked, feigning innocence.