Just Rambling

Scott and Kip are fighting and Carter is worried they’re going to get a divorce so he sits them down to act as a therapist and asks how they can fix this. Kip jokingly says something like “Getting you in out bed would solve most of the issues.” Kip only meant it as a joke but Carter is like “I willing to try if you think that’ll help” and thirty minutes later, Kip riding Carter like his life depends on it while Scott watches with his dick in his hand. Scott cannot believe Kip’s plan worked.

AU where Shane never meets Rose because he stays at the bar and leaves with the hot bartender instead. At the all star game, Ilya is fishing for information about the nameless, faceless ghost because he knows Shane has someone else, he just can’t prove it.

AU where JJ and Cliff become besties and start exchanging notes on their respective locker rooms. Cliff tells him how Ilya always disappears when they’re in Montreal and JJ talks about Shane vanishing in Boston. The two are nosy so they decide to follow Ilya. JJ picks Cliff up at the hotel and watch as Ilya leaves. They follow behind his cab until they reach the destination. They watch Ilya get out of the car and go to the door. The door opens and they’re shocked to see Shane ushering Ilya in. They talk about it and come to the conclusion that Shane and Ilya are friends but due to the league pushing the rivalry, they can’t be friends publicly. After that day, Cliff tells Ilya about JJ and JJ talks about Cliff with Shane. They hope their friendship will let them see they can be friends out in the open. After Shane and Ilya are outted, JJ and Cliff realized they actually witnessed one of their hookups.

Luca staying with Shane and Ilya for a few days while his place is being fumigated. He’s lying in bed when Hollanov’s sex sounds fill his room. Luca sends a video to the team group chat (the one without Shane and Ilya). It’s of him staring blankly into the camera. In the background, you can clearly hear Ilya moaning loudly. Luca is like ‘I can’t listen to Shane suck Ilya’s soul out of his body for the next 2 days. Can I stay with one of you?’ and Troy is like ‘You can come over and listen to me suck Harris’s soul out of his body’ and the other players respond with similar stuff like ‘You’re welcomed to listen to me fuck my wife’ and Luca remembers he’s a hockey player with money and checks into a hotel.

Ilya has surgery on his shoulder in the off season. The surgery is considered a minor one and everything goes well. He walks up from surgery high as a kite but otherwise fine. Yuna, David, and Shane are talking to Ilya when a nurse walks in. The nurse explains he’s here to examine the small incision and check the stitches but when he tries to pull down the hospital gown, Ilya freaks out and tells him no. “I’m married!” He slurs out. “Happily married!” They try to explain that the nurse is just doing his job but Ilya isn’t having it. Only Shane can undress him so Shane peels back the gown enough for the nurse to look at the stitches. Shane apologizes for Ilya’s outburst but the nurse shrugs them off and says it was actually kind of cute.

After the Centaurs win the cup, they go out partying. A video, posted by an anon account, of Ilya twerking on Shane goes viral. Troy post a video of him twerking on Harris. Bood post a video of him attempting to twerk on his wife and the other Centaurs players follow suit, posting videos of them twerking on their respective partners (or the air if they’re single). Harris briefly updates the Centaurs bio to ‘Twerk Team’.

Omegaverse AU where Shane doesn’t get a chance to run away during tuna melt-gate because Beta Shane and Alpha Ilya accidentally bond on Ilya’s couch. Ilya can no longer play hockey because bonded Alphas can be aggressive and endanger the other players. Shane is worried Ilya will hate him for taking him away from hockey but Ilya isn’t that broken up about it because 1) he gets Shane, 2) he moves to Canada and gets citizenship, 3) he doesn’t have to go back to Russia, and 4) when his family ask him for money, he can rightfully say that he no longer has a job and can’t support them. When they ask about Shane’s money, he tells them he’s beta runs a strict program and he doesn’t have access to any of his money. That’s not true, Shane lets Ilya get whatever he wants because he still feels guilty over the bonding and him being forced out of hockey, but they don’t have to know that.

A few years after they’re married, Ilya and Shane decide they want to start a family. They decide they want two kids. Shane isn’t quite ready to step away from hockey, so they decide that Ilya will carry the first and Shane will have the second child a few years later. Ilya becomes pregnant soon after the conversation and Ilya discovers, over the course of the pregnancy, that he really likes being pregnant. After their daughter is born, Ilya asks Shane if he can carry the next baby as well and Shane is fine with that. Two kids turn into three and then four and then five. When Ilya announces that he’s pregnant with their sixth child, #Shanestayoffhim trends for three days straight.

Yuna is on set with Shane and Ilya when the photographer’s assistant tells her they’re ready to begin. She turns to tell Shane and Ilya, but they’re not there. She goes to the dressing room, and the two are not there either. She runs around the set, trying to find them, but they’re no where to be found. She tries calling them but gets no answer. She decides to go outside because they’re definitely not in the building. She walks outside to the back of the building, and the sight makes her heart leap. Ilya has his back against the building,mand Shane is standing in front of him. Ilya’s arms are wrapped around Shane while Shane gestures to the ‘No Smoking’ sign above Ilya’s head. They’re both laughing. Ilya leans in to press his face in Shane’s neck as the two giggle. Yuna snaps a quick photo of them before going back to momager mode and telling them they have work to do. After the shoot, she sends the picture to them. Ilya posts the photo with the caption ‘This isn’t the first time Shane has cornered me in No Smoking areas’ and Shane comments ‘You liked it both times’ and the internet is abuzz with new Hollanov lore.

David Hollander signs up for IG to post pictures of his hot wife but after Shane and Ilya are outted and married, his IG goes from being a Yuna Hollander fan page to a Yuna, Shane and Ilya fan page. He loves to post candid shots and videos of his three favorite people and his IG account blows up overnight. Millions of people follow his page to see the cute videos of them at brunch and a random photo of Shane carrying Ilya on his back. He turns down a number of brand deals because he just wants to keep the page about his family. He never tells Yuna that he turns down brand deals because he knows she’ll put him six feet under.