what even?

Shane even SAID he chose Ilya, but Ilya didn't FEEL like it was super confident. Ilya is depressed, which can make you infer the worst possible tone to everything. I would know, because I've had an argument with a friend about how I felt she didn't care about me, when the problem was that I casually asked my friend if we could hang out (emotionally, I was destroyed and needed a hangout), and she casually told me she was busy. My feelings didn't reflect reality because if I told her I needed a hangout cuz I felt like shit, she would come over. Because she does care about me. Shane "go-getter" Hollander would have figured something out if there was any bit of communication from his boyfriend, since he can't rely on his divine providence from the RR, as she wants him to be the villain in this fight.

I'll even copy-paste that part of Shane and Ilya's argument from the book. The bold is from me.

“You wouldn’t even choose me, would you?” Ilya said. “If it is between me and hockey.” “Of course I would,” Shane said, though not as confidently as Ilya would have liked.

"not as confidently as Ilya would have liked" is literally straight-up tone policing. Ilya is ignoring Shane's words in favor of the emotional subtext, which, as we well know, neurodivergent people all over the world are telling us, is hard!

-----

Plus, the start of the argument only happens because Ilya tries to keep it casual, and he gets a casual answer!!! I cannot explain to y'all how badly I wanted to toss TLG into a paper shredder when I read the following page of text. I'm going to bold every mention of "casual" or when Ilya is purposely keeping the tone chill btw.

“Bood is having a party tonight.” Ilya said it casually, as if there were no particular reason he was letting Shane know. As if his stomach wasn’t a mess as he anticipated Shane’s reaction.  “Zane Boodram? He’s having a party on Boxing Day?” “Yes. Not a big party. It will be chill. Mostly just the team and partners. Bood has fun parties.”  “Oh.” Ilya held his breath.  “Did you want to go or something?” Shane asked, clearly confused. “I could stay here, I guess. Or head back to—”  “I want you to go too,” Ilya said. “I want you to come with me to the party.”  Shane twisted around so they were facing each other on Ilya’s couch. “You want me to go to a party with your teammates? Why?”  So they can fucking meet my boyfriend, Ilya wanted to scream. But instead, he kept his tone light and said, “They are cool people. You might have fun.”  “But...wouldn’t it be weird, if we showed up together?”  Ilya shrugged easily, as if this was a normal thing for him to suggest. “They know you would be in Ottawa for Christmas. We are friends, so I invite you to a party. No big deal.”  Shane’s face scrunched up in confusion, then he shook his head. “Too weird. I don’t think so.”  The dismissal, though expected, irritated Ilya. No, irritated was too small a word—it infuriated him. For a moment, Ilya didn’t react. He stared at Shane, stony-faced, while anger scorched through him like lava. Then, before he said anything he may regret, he stood up and walked out of the living room. Shane caught up with him in the kitchen.  “You can go,” he said. “It’s fine.”  “Great,” Ilya snapped.  “What’s wrong?” Shane sounded so genuinely clueless about why Ilya might want him to meet his friends that it only angered Ilya further.

Shane sounds genuinely clueless after Ilya gives him about two minutes of CASUAL warning about a party where, if the captain actually went after blowing off several team invitations, just to bring a friend, it would be weird. Guys. It would be weird if Shane Hollander going to the party is the only reason that Ilya goes to the party. Especially since the party is described by Ilya as "Mostly just the team and partners." Soooo if Shane, who would be just 'a friend' at a party for team members and their romantic partners, thinks that would be a little too weird, why the fuck is that a problem? Three guesses, and the first two don't count.

-----

Shane is said to not understand how much Ilya sacrificed for their future, but should I remind everyone what Ilya's original plan was going to be? In HR, Ilya plans to let the rivalry fade by moving to the west, where Ilya and Shane would only see each other twice a year.

“I was thinking,” Ilya said. It was late morning the next day, and they were sitting on the deck with coffee. “If I played for a team that was not Boston. Maybe in the west. The rivalry would not be such a big deal.” Shane seemed to consider this. “That’s true. We’d only play against each other twice a year.” He frowned and Ilya knew he didn’t like that idea any more than he did. We’d only see each other twice a year. “Is…like, sacrifice. For future gain, yes?” Shane brightened. “Future gain?” “Yes. Our rivalry has been huge. But maybe we can help it to…fade away? A little?” “Yeah…” Shane said. He was getting excited. “Yeah! I don’t like the idea of you being so far, but we could make people forget all about us as rivals and maybe no one would care about us at all one day.”

But the thing is that Shane and Ilya want to see each other! Twice a year is too little for them, so the next scene is literally Shane thinking of a different idea. It's the famous nighttime wake-up and listen to my ten-year plan for our future scene that leads into the "I love you's". The scene I'm most interested in is when Ilya specifically declines Montreal because they couldn't afford both Shane and Ilya at their full worth. I wonder who ends up being paid less than their worth in the end...

“I am a free agent, after next season.” He definitely had Shane’s full attention now. “You’d leave Boston?” “I have just been thinking. Maybe…a Canadian team.” “Holy shit, really?” “Yes.” “Like where?” Ilya could see the thoughts play out on Shane’s face like a movie: What if we played together in Montreal? No. Montreal couldn’t afford both of us. “Not Montreal,” Ilya said gently. “No. I know.” But good god, now Ilya was imagining that. Playing together, living together, being together. It was never going to happen. But it was a nice thought.

How amazing that Ilya's dream ends up being fulfilled without him having to be paid less than what he is worth.

-----

In TLG, right after Shane gets angry in their fight and says that line about wanting to win cups instead of smoking between losses, Ilya thinks about how he chose Ottawa because it was Shane's hometown! What the actual fuck are you talking about, Ilya? What the fuck is RR writing?? She purposely rewrites the Ottawa move to be about choosing between love and your career, instead of the fact that it was about choosing BOTH for Ilya. In fact, the sheer insanity of how the Ottawa plan was named as "Shane's plan" when things get hard is always baffling to me, when originally, Ilya liked it more than his plan. I'm going to put the TLG passage of the Ottawa thing and the HR passage just for anyone who doesn't remember it.

In TLG:

Shane truly didn’t understand anything. Not what Ilya had given up for him, certainly. Ilya could be in Boston right now, leading one of the top teams in the league to more Stanley Cups. He could be breaking more records, and winning more awards. Instead he’d chosen to come to Ottawa, when he could have gone to almost any team in the league. He’d chosen a team that hadn’t made the playoffs in over a decade. He’d chosen it because it was Shane’s hometown, and close to where Shane lived. He’d chosen it so he could build a life in Canada with the man he loved.

In HR:

“You play for Ottawa, I play for Montreal. Those cities are an hour apart. We start a charity together, you and me. Something that benefits both cities. So now people see us working together on something. We make up some story about how I approached you with this idea, and—”  “Or I approached you.”  “Whatever. The point is, we tell the press, the fans, everyone, that by working together on the cause that means so much to both of us, we have developed a mutual respect for each other...”  “Yes. And also we are fucking each other. Any questions?”  “Fuck off! This is a great idea, Rozanov!” Ilya laughed. Shane hit him with a pillow.  “Is not bad,” Ilya finally conceded. “So we start this charity...”  “And it wouldn’t be bullshit either. I’ve been wanting to start one anyway. We’ll do something that means a lot to both of us.”  “Yes. Okay.”  “We still play hard against each other on the ice, obviously. I mean, I am never going to stop enjoying beating your ass.”  Ilya snorted. “Sure.”  “And...like I said. We’re an hour away from each other. All year.” He wanted Ilya to see this vision as clearly as he could. It seemed tantalizingly possible. Easy, even. “And you’d be in Canada. And you could apply for citizenship eventually.”  “Yes. I understand that part.” “And maybe...someday. When we both retire. We can...be together. For real.” Ilya looked stunned by that part. “You really think that far ahead, Hollander?” “I do about this.”

The literal reason for it is NUMBER ONE: Canadian Citizenship, NUMBER TWO: Killing the Rivalry, NUMBER THREE: Being close to each other for love.

How do we know Ilya wanted Canadian citizenship? Here you go:

In HR: “Do you still want to become an American citizen?” “I don’t know. I am thinking…maybe somewhere else.” “Oh.”

Paid service with no ads: Well, if they're not funding it with ad revenue, they need to charge us something.

Paid service with ads: Well that's bullshit.

BACURAU (2019)

WONDERFUL NEWS!!

some fans try to grapple with this contradiction by interpreting him as a homophobic or otherwise bigoted dudebro who needed to be narratively forcefemmed by the league's homophobia and ilya's magical healing white cock. i find this deeply dissatisfying because it's propelled by a reactionary impulse to justify the text's central (racist) conceit and, where it does seek to challenge the racial fetishization, it does so by reinforcing the implicit supremacy of hegemonic masculinity. canon shane is effeminized, fetishized, underwritten, and a frequent victim of his peers' bigotry, so fans respond by transforming him into a more masculine and bigoted character. his white hockey player counterparts who textually conform to the sport's gender roles in contrast with shane and have implications of being racist—scott travelled to "exotic" places to sleep with men, ryan and ilya both fetishize their respective partner's race—are excised of these complications to explore how they heroically overcome their white supremacist patriarchal sports culture.

both the books and the fandom actualize the occident through construction of the inferior orient. canon shane is repeatedly targeted by racially charged homophobia purely so the books can explore how this impacts the feelings of white gay characters. fanon shane is distorted into a perpetrator whose selfish cowardice foils his white counterparts' bravery. canon shane strives to be an unselfish lover to his female partners against every gay instinct in his body and pushes back at hayden for saying jackie got "fixed." fanon shane is a misogynistic creep, while ilya who canonically ignores shane's protests in bed without prior negotiation (the most egregious example that comes to mind is in chapter 27 of the long game, while cliff is right outside their hotel room) is reconfigured into a consent king who drinks his respect women juice in lieu of challenging the implications of this romance genre convention. canon shane worries about his former training mate who is an openly gay speed skater and thinks whichever nhl players comes out first would be "brave" but is reluctant to be that person due to the disproportionate harassment he already faces. fanon shane is judging other gay characters for being out and putting themselves at risk, while white characters are enthusiastic allies. canon shane wants to be more in tune with queer culture and be less ashamed of his queerness, and he admires characters like max and leah and fabian whom he is in community with. fanon shane rejects community and solidarity and has to be coaxed into being an ally by the white characters around him

i’m sorry, she fucking W H A T

Ilya - who laughs at him and mocks him that he's coming out as gay, as if Ilya hadn't been spiraling over the evidence of Shane's bisexuality for months

Montreal - who aren't supportive and basically have a don't ask, don't tell rule for Shane while also still have homophobic language in the locker room

she cannot let ilya be misunderstood, and by virtue of this his actions always have sincere, unselfish motivations. this also harms ilya’s existing character!! during this fight, he thinks: “Ilya didn’t want to fight. He was exhausted, and miserable, and his boyfriend was breaking his fucking heart.” there is almost no reflection on ilya’s part about his actions aside from ‘he was sure he’d never hurt shane.’ zero internal interrogation. ilya is not curious about what shane might be feeling in the moment. ilya also does not really consider what might have informed this escalated reaction from himself

meanwhile, shane’s reaction to this fight is:

“Obviously he had fucked something up. He hadn’t been paying attention to Ilya, or to what Ilya had given up for him, and he now realized that Ilya had given up a whole fucking lot for Shane. For them. Of course he resented Shane. Ilya had left his home country, his family—even if only a brother he hated remained—his team, his friends in Boston, his entire fucking life, really. He’d changed everything.”

This is your semi frequent reminder that there is no official AO3 app

All those are unofficial and available on the Google play store as of August 13th 2025. They mirror AO3's content and insert ads, for which the developer gets paid by page impression (that's every time the ad appears in the fic you're reading) not just clicks.

No money goes to AO3, nor to the fic writer. It goes to the person who did the bare minimum.

Many of these apps have poorly worded or non existent privacy policies, so they may also be mining as much data as possible and selling that on to unknown third parties.

YAGA

A WITCH HUNT

it upsets you when people misinterpret his actions because you love him so much you know why he's doing these things even though people may get it wrong? shane, on the other hand.... he's selfish. he's just stupid. he doesn't understand the dark side of hockey. he's oblivious. agrees with the popular hc that he's autistic and then walks it back bc that resulted in people having empathy for shane (and also makes clear that it is ilya's responsibility to communicate more effectively to accommodate his partner, which we just can't have. ilya can't change his behavior to accommodate shane. it always has to be the other way around).

"Not everything is about you, Hollander." He didn't look at Shane at all when he said it. His voice hadn't been angry. He just sounded...tired. And sad. Shane studied his profile. His own anger left him, and he found himself caring about Ilya Rozanov, which was an odd sensation.

Characters misreading each other is a very common romance trope, like in Pride and Prejudice. Usually that's something that is eventually resolved as the characters come to know each other better, but Reid cannot stand for Ilya to be thought badly of by the audience even for a scene--even when the characters barely know each other at all. Instead, Shane has to have a perfect perception of Ilya's mental state (even though that directly contradicts her description of Shane's qualities) and immediately puts his own feelings aside to center Ilya's. See, Ilya isn't being a jerk, reader, Shane is concerned about him so you should be too!

It happens in the Sochi scene as well.

Rozanov was being an asshole, which was nothing new, but he didn’t seem to mean it. In fact, Shane would bet that Rozanov would actually really like him to stay. He looked like he could use a hug.

no. that is against ao3’s terms of service.

anything that involves money is against their site’s terms of service. doesn’t matter if it’s commission or donation or anything. on ao3, you cannot mention or link anything that involves money.

ao3 is a nonprofit site known for hosting millions of works of others’ copyrighted characters. it has to stay nonprofit and forbid any mention of money on its platform to avoid getting sued left and right. I’ve said this before, but the only reason ao3 can exist as it is today is because its main rule is “nobody can use their site to ask people for money in any way, shape or form”.