aroace thoughts

If anyone knows of more, especially alloaro characters since I realised I don’t actually know of any, please add them! I’d love to see them :)

Canon:

Jughead - the Archie comics (aroace)

Georgia (aroace) - Loveless by Alice Oseman (<— amazing book btw, def recommend!)

Todd (alloace) - Bojack Horseman

Spongebob (aroace)

Nancy (alloace) - Every Heart a Doorway by Seanan McGuire

Aled (demisexual) - Radio Silence by Alice Oseman

Felicity (aroace) - The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy by Mackenzi Lee

Varys (aroace) - Game of Thrones

Raphael (aroace) - Shadowhunters

Florence (alloace) - Sex Education

Jonathan Sims (alloace) - The Magnus Archives podcast

Sir Talfryn and Jet Siquliak (both aroace) - The Penumbra Podcast

Monkey D. Luffy (aroace) - One Piece

Unconfirmed/Head-canon:

Jo March (aroace?) - Little Women by L.M. Alcott

Sherlock Holmes (ace?)

Luna Lovegood (aro?) - Harry Potter

Frodo Baggins and Bilbo Baggins (both aroace?) - Lord of the Rings

Canon:

Tori Spring (ace) - Heartstopper

Isaac Henderson (aroace) - Heartstopper

Sakuko Kodama (aroace) - Koisenu Futari

Satoru Takahashi (aroace) - Koisenu Futari

Yuriko (aroace) - I Want To Be A Wall

Ca$h (alloace) - Heartbreak High

Jess (aroallo) - Loveless

Jasnah Kholin (ace) - The Stormlight Archive

Head-canon:

Ryland Grace (aroace) - Project Hail Mary

Again, please add any others in the tags or comments!

For my ace buddies and fellow demis.

I went, "What. no. she/her."

"How does that work? With she/her/hers and they/them?"

I stared at her. "What are you talking about?"

"Well you came out as-" and I said, "I'm asexual."

She replied, "Like an amoeba, I know."

"Oh. My god. No. Mom. It doesn't- it's not the asexual you learned about in biology. I didn't come out as a single celled organism."

With heavy relief, she said "Oh, it has a different meaning?"

So just incase someone else needs to hear it too, greyromantic and greysexual experiences are valid. You're still aspec if your attraction is specific, rather than not at all. If you never experienced the "these people have to be lying/exaggerating" confusion around attraction. If you still believe you might find the "just right" partner that actually makes you feel some type of way.

It doesn't have to be all of nothing to be valid. We're allowed to stand in the grey area.

💚🩶🤍🩶💚

Tfw you forget there's term for it, on account of the amnesia

My dad has 4 half siblings and two step siblings. They're all a decent bit younger than him. When I was a teenager, we went to a family reunion, and I realized something—my dad did not respect his siblings. He looked down on all of them. He saw them as fuck-ups and overgrown children. My dad had the American dream: well paying management job, suburban house, wife, and three kids. My aunt and uncles did not. Excluding my aunt, none of them were married or in serious relationships. They hadn't really settled into long term careers. Several of them were working the kind of jobs that get called "Unskilled labor." So he looked down on them because the youngest one was in his thirties (and several were much older), and yet none of them had "settled down" into what he saw as lifelong, permanent careers and relationships and lives. He was polite to their faces, sure, but I heard how he talked about them behind their backs, to my mother.

And then a few years ago, we visited his brothers again for Thanksgiving. And I realized something again--he respected them now. He saw them as equals. Why? Well. All of a sudden, every single one of them had serious, committed romantic partners. They didn't even need to still be with those partners—one of my uncle's fiance passed away from cancer before they could marry—just having had one showed that they matured into a real adult participating in society. In fact, at one point, my aunt was telling my mom about how one of my uncles was no longer living in an apartment she owned, but instead, after having a steady girlfriend for about a year, he moved in with her. And my mom literally said to my aunt, "wow. Look at that. He finally grew up."

One of the lines that frequently gets repeated about anti-aspec sentiment is "why would anyone hate asexuals/aromantics/etc? They aren't even doing anything." And that's exactly it. In the eyes of amatonormative culture, we aren't doing anything. Adults are supposed to do things. That's how you become a member of society.

I wrote a master’s thesis on intentionally single people, and the number of them that said in various ways, “I didn’t know not dating people was even an option at first” was absolutely tragic. They honestly thought they had no choice and it never occurred to them that opting out was even a possibility available to them.  

People honestly believe these are life experience you are required to have AND THEY ARE NOT.

Today’s the day! ‘The Other A in LGBTQIA+’ by AUREA is officially out today! Dive into the powerful, personal stories of the aromantic community—our voices, our experiences, our truth. Read more about it here: https://www.aromanticism.org/en/news-feed/our-book-the-other-a-in-lgbtqia-coming-out-now. Grab your copy now and help us celebrate this milestone for aromantic visibility!

It was kind of a joke between me and a friend ("you wouldn't judge someone for having gone rock climbing with a bunch of different people") but honestly the more I thought about it the more I bought into it unironically because:

It is a physical activity done with one or more partners

You should only go rock climbing with people you trust to not let you fall

You should not go rock climbing with someone who is drunk or currently incapable of rational decision-making

Some people get super super super into rock climbing and do not shut up about all the places they have climbed and how many are left on their bucket list and these people are usually men between the ages of 20 and 35 and like it's fine dude I'm glad you're happy but I don't know what most of those mountains even are

While many consider it a fun activity, pressuring someone into climbing when they don't want to (or ignoring their feelings and just dangling them off a cliff,) could cause both psychological and physical trauma

There is no moral value to it whatsoever. Who you have gone rock climbing with (or whether you have rock climbed at all) has no bearing on who you are as a person. Imagine telling someone "it's not that heights make you nauseous, it's just that you haven't found the right person to belay you!" or "you need to save your first time rock climbing for someone special." That would be absurd.

For some people it is a deep and moving personal experience.