trans men absolutely are in sex work, the majority just present as women for work because it's much harder to make money if you don't. You don't see them because they're forced to detransition for work or you haven't even tried to look for the ones who are presenting masc. They're all over the sex work forums if you know what to look for and how they talk about it.
there is no "trans men aren't pushed into sex work" privilege. It is not a privilege to be forced into it AND have to detransition for it. This isn't a competition
I think a lot of "trans men aren't affected by this" stuff boils down to the trans men in question that ARE affected being deminished to not being men at all or being forced to detransition/pretend to be women
A lot of talk about boymoding and how hard it is but trans men do the exact same thing the other way around and a lot of times specifically because they are forced into sex work
The trans community in general would be way healthier if we realized we literally go through the same exact stuff
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okay i know it's not the main point so no one ever talks about it (understandable) but i will. the "delusional little girl" talking point is like so ableist. like okay why do you not trust the delusional "girl" to tell you what their identity is. i was a delusional girl growing up (kind of still am <- system moment) and it did make me have a complicated relationship with my gender (it's also the trauma) But at the end of the day I'm still the authority on what my gender is. like yknow what maybe if the "delusional little girl" tells you they're not a girl then maybe they're right, because ultimately they know themself the best, and their delusions doesn't make them stupid, or unaware of their identity.
kinda tired of non binary being tied to skinny androgyny that's mostly white. I say that's as a non binary transmasc/boy thing who's fat and black.
being non binary can look like anything and anyone but especially individuals who have different body types outside of thin. they can have body/facial hair too. show up for all enbies.
i dont know if you lot are ready for "not every trans man you meet will ID as transmasculine in any regard and not every trans woman you meet will ID as transfeminine in any regard" but i wanna say it anyway
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Also if you are intersex you donât get to decide who is âactually intersexâ thatâs for for like doctors and experts and stuff.
To be fair Iâm an outside observer but this is how it should be for like, gay people, trans people, disabled people, etc. and I AM part of those groups!
they constantly try to erase intersex people and do invasive surgeries on intersex children in order to get them to conform to a strict sex binary or even perform unnecessary medical procedures on intersex adults without consent
doctors arent trustworthy when it comes to intersex people or intersex variations
Thatâs fair honestly, I just couldnât think of a better group, I guess some like council of intersex people? Although the issue there is them ignoring a small intersex group and causing issues all over again, or self id.
A lot of doctors also don't know about vulvar variations, if I didn't accidentally stumble across a post about vulvar hypospadias on here I would've never known about my variant and thought I was "deformed" for the rest of my life.
I didn't know having my urethra inside my vaginal canal wasn't a perisex thing. I saw an intersex person explaining hypoapadias (I'm not sure if it's vulvar or a different one?) I genuinely wouldn't know I was intersex if I hadn't spoken to that intersex person and asked them questions while explaining, explicitly, my anatomy. They told me that what I had was an intersex condition. What's more? When I informed my SIL that it turned out I was intersex, and explained HOW I was intersex, she said that was 'typical' and not intersex and I had to calmly and patiently explain to her that if her anatomy was the same as mine, then she was also intersex because the perisex anatomy specifically had the urethra in between the clit and the vaginal canal. That the diagrams shown weren't inaccurate, they were just for perisex people. She got really quiet for a moment and I could see it just.. click for her that she was also intersex.
We haven't talked about it since, so I have no idea if she's come to terms with it, but I have. I am intersex. It is extremely common and people will lie about it being common because if it's revealed to NOT be rare, if things that ARE intersex are actually LABELED AS SUCH, then the whole 'there are only two genders/sexes' bullshit falls apart. And suddenly you can't control people with the bullshit narrative anymore (this is not the only reason, but every reason is fucking bullshit and is meant to continue oppression regardless)
Doctors have a vested interest in maintaining that intersex people are rare and they aren't. Most people just don't fucking know they're intersex. They think something is wrong with them (like the person above) or they're like my SIL and I, they think they're perisex because what makes us intersex isn't that obvious.
im so fucking tired of "transmasc is when afab trans and transfem is when amab trans" IM NOTTT TRANSMASC AND IF YOU REFER TO ME AS SUCH I WILL CONSIDER IT MISGENDERING. STOP THINKING IN BINARIES. STOP THINKING IN THE FALSE BOY-MASC-FEM-GIRL SPECTRUM. MASC MEANS MASCULINE. FEM MEANS FEMININE. I AM NEITHER. I AM ANDROGYNOUS. I AM NONBINARY. NOT MASC-LITE. CAN YOU FUCKING STOP
I really gotta talk more about being from Indiana and how when I was living there the options for obtaining HRT legally were like, 2 clinics several hours away from where I lived that didn't take most people's insurances and Howard Brown Hospital in Chicago whose like... entire informed consent trans medical care structure completely fell apart for out of state patients during the height of the pandemic.
Everyone I knew went to HB for HRT in Northwest Indiana and many of us on testosterone got completely fucked by doctors afraid of telehealth laws regarding the prescription of scheduled drugs across state lines. I watched two older guys in my life at the time struggle to get their testosterone that they had been getting consistently with HB for over a decade. I straight up fell through the cracks of their system because I had been getting my HRT through their youth clinic and was about to age out. That was the first time I stopped testosterone against my will because I couldn't get my prescription filled.
I was in my early 20's at the time and had a handful of adult trans mentors in their 30's-40's who said "Kid you should get out of here while you can because it's going to get bad here" so I saved and planned. And I did get out. And it did get worse. And I miss my hometown and my local queer community every single day. I miss the people who are still there struggling. My friends. My neighbors. The queer people that took me in and under their wings as my new extended family when I came out as a teenager.
It's just. Frustrating. I had to leave my whole life and all the people I loved behind so I could live safely and freely as a trans person. I don't think half of the people who get pissy about the way I talk about systemic oppression and institutional power can actually comprehend the weight of that.
[ID: A Black butch woman, seated, says, âI know I am a woman. I know I am butch. I know that there is nothing wrong with that. And I know that within the confines of the word âwoman,â there is plenty of room for me.â]
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Gill-Peterson - 2023 - Trans Auto-Antonym Theory (The MascâFemme Dialectic)..pdf - Proton Drive
someone gave this to me. It was paywalled but someone got around it. I'm only half way through but you totally have to read this. It's mask off
God I don't even know what her point is here. "Trans" as a term is problematic because it pretends that trans women aren't more oppressed than trans men, the solution is to accept that "trans" is meant to be about a dialectic between the "opposite forces" of masculinity and femininity (and uhhhh nonbinary and agender people too or whatever, which Jules constantly bemoans how much she doesn't understand what a nonbinary experience even is but I'm meant to buy that her theory has genuinely considered how nonbinary and agender people fit into this, sure!!!!!) and t4t is here too and we can fuck about it, problem solved.
I have to point out that she says
There is the non-binary denouncement of so-called binary trans women for apparently taking gender too seriously, or perhaps taking beauty too seriously, in medically transitioning.
And then she cites an article, Why Canât My Famous Gender Nonconforming Friends Get Laid? by Meredith Talusan. And I do not get why. This article is about Meredith (a nonbinary person) talking about her friends Alok Vaid Menon (who is nonbinary) and Jacob Tobia (who is genderqueer), and their collective observation that Alok and Jacob struggle to get dates by virtue of being visibly gender-non conforming and androgynous, while Meredith (who can pass as a cis woman and went through HRT and SRS while still identifying as binary) is seen as much more desirable. They reflects on their friend's struggles with being nonbinary in the dating world while visibly androgynous in the "wrong" way.
There is nothing in this article about how âbinary trans womenâ must be denounced for âtaking gender too seriously.â That is entirely a projection on Peterson's part, one she does nothing to explain; just pops this article into this paper I'm guessing because it pissed her off when she read it. The article is about misandrogyny and how it impacts nb/gq/gncâs people love lives. But of course, to Peterson, this cannot be interpreted as anything other than an attack on âso-calledâ binary trans women.
Because nonbinary people are never ever allowed to ever imply that being aligned with the binary in certain ways can result in being spared from kinds of transphobia that others, particularly many nb/gq/gnc people, cannot escape as long as we live authentically. Pointing out that a visibly androgynous, hairy and feminine, body is seen as undesirable is, of course, secretly REALLY about how nonbinary people loathe the True Transsexuals and their HRT and surgeries (nevermind that Meredith is a nonbinary person who physically transitioned, a group that Peterson loves to pretend doesnât exist). Because everything nonbinary people do and say when it comes to describing our oppression is actually about being big meanies to binary trans people, The Main Characters Of Transness.
The "so-called binary" thing is a dogwhistle imo, because while all trans people can be affected by misandrogyny, binary trans people who CONSTANTLY define themselves in opposition to nonbinary people, love to act like being called binary is a slur (hmmm where have we heard that one before, class?). But I just know it grinded her gears to hear Alok joking about how going on E and getting electrolysis would make them be seen as more desirable, to see a person who decided being a binary trans woman wasn't right for them and who is openly talking about exorsexism/misandrogyny (if not by those names).
this isn't even getting into just how much this whole theory of hers is EXTREMELY fundamentally binary, but she thinks she can get around that by mentioning nonbinary people once or twice and suddenly its totally not everyone! like:
I suggest that trans is better regarded as an auto-antonym than an umbrella or an interchangeable prefix: a word that generates two opposite meanings (in this case, masculine and feminine). This auto-antonymic quality in fact produces many more than one pair of âoppositeâ meanings, considering that trans holds nonbinary and agender significance too, rejecting any singular masculine/feminine master dialectic.
Nonbinary people are brought up three times in this whole paper, and one of those times was the above-mentioned bad faith reading of that article. & anyways, after reading her blame the fucking Skrmetti decision & the legal attacks on trans healthcare on "vainly championing the ostensible superiority of androgyny, or, today, a kind of immaterial, nonbinary idealism" and her doing that whole fuckass article waxing lyrical about how nonbinary people are just playing dress up and aren't meaningfully different than binary people, I'm sorry but fucking Press X To Doubt that she put the line about nonbinarity in there for any other reason than to say she didn't technically exclude nonbinary people if people yell at her on Twitter.
Anyways re: "the trans battle of the sexes can be fixed by t4t sex and everyone just agreeing that transfems have it worse, because that's the only real problem here :)" didn't S.L Void literally write an essay on this exact "solution":
âtransmasc vs transfemâ discourse & reactionary âboys vs girlsâ politics in trans spaces
There are also cases where the reaction [from all types of people] to transmasculine people expressing pain they have suffered due to this kind of discourse and the sweeping generalizations being made about transmasculine people that sounds something like: âin real life we donât talk about this, we all just kiss each otherâ, and this reaction is just as shitty as dismissing it entirely. It adds a dynamic of something that many trans people are intimately familiar with, that of the âplease, I like you when you donât speak and are simply something nice to look atâ, the kind of reasoning that strikes the fear of being abandoned by loved ones into the hearts of many many trans people of all different gender embodiments. [...]
It is not helping anyone to pretend like âin real lifeâ these problems do not exist and in real life we all just kiss, cause itâs not true and it creates a situation where transmasculine people feel like to express pain is to be a party-pooper, and to be an ally is to be happily sexually available with no regard for who perpetuates antitransmasculinity or not. [...]
So while yeah, its possible that in real life, some of us are just kissing each other, itâs also true that many of us are doing both â weâre acknowledging and working to combat one another's oppression, and loving each other while we do it. It is also very possible that in real life the opposite is happening, and there is antitransmasculinity and transmisogyny being perpetuated in spaces that should be mostly free of them. âIrl we just kissâ is a dismissal of this, and itâs not helpful for anyone. It mistakes attraction for allyship, something we sincerely cannot afford as a unit.
^^^^ this is the problem with Peterson's whole approach to these gender wars and many other people's. While not always productive, some of this discourse is the dialectic, it is a slow addressing of some deeply unaddressed wounds in our community, and importantly, this cannot be done without addressing anti-transmasculinity and exorsexism alongside anti-transfemininity/transmisogyny.
Anyone who insists they want all peace and love and t4t sex between trans people, but also doesn't mention ATM or exorsexism at all, by any name (and in fact dismisses the concept of transmisandry outright) either doesn't actually understand what problems we are collectively dealing with, or they do not want to understand.
yall its 2026 can we stop calling it âwomenâs healthcareâ. there are people who exist that need uterus, vulva, vagina, and breast related healthcare and arenât women. PLEASE stop forgetting about trans people and intersex people for the love of fucking god
Ok people buckle up cause this is something from a wholee ass country that I feel people in the North should know more about. This is basicly a full on modern history lesson
So, back during the post pandemic years (I think 2023? I don't remember) there was a movement to push the pronouns "elle" for nb pronouns, the most remembers installment being a person saying to their Google meet class "I'm not Your classmate [femenine], I'm Your classmate [neutral]" in a voice most people deemed obnoxious
This led to a complete smear campaing, with people citing reasone why the pronouns were not "gramatacly valid", stitching that one Rick puking clip with the "compañere" audio and people talking about how adding e at the end of words was gonna confuse kids. It all culminated (at least in Argentina) with a governor making it ilegal to have the pronoun in oficial documents and making it completly invalid in legal settings. Some people (incluiding myself) still use it in prĂvate, but is almost imposible to actually use it in public, having most people simply choosing to use "any/all" to avoid ridicule
This is without Even mentioning that people were scandalizing over xenogendered just a month or two ago (incluiding almost all of the few people that were actually in support with the neutral pronouns thing), but I won't be diving into it as i'm not xenogender and I feel it would be unfair since I havent seen or lived Even close to half of it
I'm sharing this all here Even if is in English cause i feel is incredible important to show the blatant exorsexim that is still present in the grabd majority of the south continent
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Ok people buckle up cause this is something from a wholee ass country that I feel people in the North should know more about. This is basicly a full on modern history lesson
So, back during the post pandemic years (I think 2023? I don't remember) there was a movement to push the pronouns "elle" for nb pronouns, the most remembers installment being a person saying to their Google meet class "I'm not Your classmate [femenine], I'm Your classmate [neutral]" in a voice most people deemed obnoxious
This led to a complete smear campaing, with people citing reasone why the pronouns were not "gramatacly valid", stitching that one Rick puking clip with the "compañere" audio and people talking about how adding e at the end of words was gonna confuse kids. It all culminated (at least in Argentina) with a governor making it ilegal to have the pronoun in oficial documents and making it completly invalid in legal settings. Some people (incluiding myself) still use it in prĂvate, but is almost imposible to actually use it in public, having most people simply choosing to use "any/all" to avoid ridicule
This is without Even mentioning that people were scandalizing over xenogendered just a month or two ago (incluiding almost all of the few people that were actually in support with the neutral pronouns thing), but I won't be diving into it as i'm not xenogender and I feel it would be unfair since I havent seen or lived Even close to half of it
I'm sharing this all here Even if is in English cause i feel is incredible important to show the blatant exorsexim that is still present in the grabd majority of the south continent
As a transfem person, I've mostly actually been sexually harassed and had sexual assault threatened by women, both cis and trans. I have yet to have a man threaten me directly; and trans men go well out of their way to be respectful.
That's not to say transfem people are never threatened or assaulted by men; just that, in my experience, the call is coming from inside the house.
Yeah, this post is primarily venting about the way cis women in particular talk to transgender men and how despite their "Teehee I'm gonna say you look like a predator! It's gender affirmation!" twee malgendering bullshit (cus we OBVIOUSLY need more people BRAVE enough to paint trans people as predatory) they're basically always more of a threat to the trans person than the other way around.
Especially considering transgender men and mascs have some of the most egregiously high sexual assault statistics out of any gender identity, due to it being used as punishment for our deviation in an attempt to force us back into womanhood.
So no saying transgender men look like predators isn't the #feminist move these mfs think it is
I Am Tired.
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