Wednesday the 15th. What an excellent day. Middle of the week, middle of the month. Truly, we are in the middle of things.

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@andyetsobittersweet
Wednesday the 15th. What an excellent day. Middle of the week, middle of the month. Truly, we are in the middle of things.

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A cat is a machine that turns proteins into violence.
#Helios was declawed by his former owners so he doesn't just slap things he dislikes like most cats#he really only feels confident in hissing at them#Especially because a lot of the thing he doesn't like are bugs and those are sharp sometimes :(#Selene has figured this out and now when she hears him hiss she sprints over the kill the fuck out of the bug#Helios has learned she will do this so he'll hiss at stuff louder and louder until she hears him#A nervous old man and his emotional support homicidal maniac tags by @gallusrostromegalus
I couldn't reblog without the tags because the context is hilarious
A Nervous Old Man (right) and his Emotional Support Violence Machine (Left)
Yes, he is more than twice her size. Yes, he is five times her age. Yes, he cries like a big baby until she kills Unacceptable Scary Things (earwigs) for him.
I couldn't get these two and their dynamic out of my head, @gallusrostromegalus I doodled them (guessed on their collars)
OH MY GOD MY CATS HAVE FANART
Tomorrow I will be inventing the wheel
Dude, hold on
grace, rocky, and their giant triangular blue wife (gender neutral)
Adrian, rocky, and their squishy blob wife (gender neutral)
it's Tuesday all day today and there's no known way to prevent this

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Hey. Why isnât the moon landing a national holiday in the US. Isnât that fucked up? Does anyone else think thatâs absurd?
It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! Thatâs a big deal! Iâve never thought about it before but now that I have, itâs ridiculous to me that thatâs not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why donât we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!
Itâs July 20th. Thatâs the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. Iâm ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and Iâm going to have a goddamn potluck. Youâre all invited.
Hey. Hey. Tumblr. Ides of March ppl. We can do this
Hell yeah moon holiday
Ooh coming up we should celebrate
PITCH: We call it Moon Day, and then every 7 years when it falls on a Monday, that's an even BIGGER deal and we call that Moon Day Monday and go absolutely apeshit about it (the next Moon Day Monday is in 2026 so we have a couple trial runs first)
LOVE THIS!!!
Moon Dayâs coming up, lads!
Happy Moon Day, everyone!
IT'S MOON DAY MONDAY LADS
Moon shot, Woodstock, Watergate, punk rock
Happy moon day on 915 days left
I miss when ads were a single click and then theyâre gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesnât even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.
I hate advertising. I hate that you canât do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that thereâs nothing I can do about it.
So like an hour ago I just learđŞ¨ď¸ľď¸ľned thatâ what the fuck was that. Someone just skipped a rock across my post did you see that
Here at Papa John's our pizzas can comprehend betrayal.

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âcapitalism worksâ factoid actually untrue. the 62 people who own half the worldâs wealth are outliers and should be eaten.
Absolutely nuts how they made up a number for this satire post and the correction is that reality is *more absurd* than the number they chose
no iâm afraid itâs even worse than that. 62 was correct in 2016 when the original post was made.
the anniversary of library paste manâs death is in four days.
One hundred and ten years ago to the day. Amazing. Incredible.
RIPđđđđŻ
Goddamit i hate this fucking post. I hate it because obviously if âtwelveâ followed the same pattern as the other teen numbers it wouldnât be âtwoteenâ it would be âseconteenâ. Think about it. Itâs not âthreeteenâ itâs âthirteenâ as in âthirdâ. Itâs not âfiveteenâ itâs âfifteenâ as in fifth. So with that in mind, you count âfirst, second, third, fourth, fifth,â and so on, so eleven would be âfirsteenâ and twelve would be âsecondteenâ or âseconteenâ. âFirsteen, seconteen, thirteen, fourteen, fifteenâŚ.â It just drives me absolutely mad everytime i see this post that this obvious pattern was overlooked and i cant hold in my rage anymore.
Squidward clocking out of the Krusty Krab and heading to the nearest gay after hours eventÂ
Come on, now, op. We all know squidward doesnât go to the club.
Heâs one of those âIâm not like other gaysâ gays who goes home to a bottle of wine and his obscure 50s vaudeville records, and then mopes because he can never find a boyfriend.
I love this website so much
Can anyone explain wtf is going on here especially a Korean speaker
someone on reddit explained đ
That is one of the most astronomical fuck up translations I have ever seen.
Remember! When companies lay off all their staff because AI is cheaper, this sort of shit is what you can leverage for a better contract when they are inevitably forced to hire everyone back :)

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Im a guy am i allowed to support free the nipple. I mean obviously yes, im aware that its beyond sexist that they cant but i also just like tits. I think woman should be allowed to be shirtless wherever a man is but at the same time do i just think that because im straight?
Hey man I think you can do both. Like I appreciate man tits and those are legal p much everywhere, but if I was ogling people or touching folks without permission or clutching my pearls whenever I saw a nip it'd be a different story
It's not so much "do I think boobs are hot and do I enjoy seeing them" so much as it is "do I think it's reasonable that what I personally find hot shouldn't get to dictate how others dress"
All u really got to be careful of is how u support- cause yeah,it may come off as skeevy if u get too excited about it.
But the drum we're beating here isn't "STOP EXPERIENCING FEELINGS", it's "YOUR FEELINGS AREN'T MORE IMPORTANT THAN MY BODY" and "THE HUMAN BODY IS NOT IN ITSELF OBSCENE" and "WOMEN'S BODIES BY THEMSELVES ARE NOT PORNOGRAPHIC"
And for the love of GOD don't get me started on letting people breastfeed their kids
Also llike. As a baby-steps thought excersise, consider this:
Picture the LEAST attractive person with breasts you personally can imagine. If your knee-jerk reflex is, "I no longer support that person's right to be topless", that's a Gratification motive paired with a Disgust motive.
The key is to move AWAY from Self-Gratification and Disgust and TOWARDS "Equality".
Self-gratification is something we encourage in our view of women so strongly that it almost becomes invisible- to the point of detriment to BOTH sides, which is what bedrock stone-bottom Feminism exists to address.
Your grandmother should be just as commonplace being topless at the pool as your grandpa. Your sister should be able to take her shirt off when it's scorching out and still be as safe and blasĂŠ as your brother. Seeing a mom whip out a tit on the bus to feed her baby should be as commonplace as a milk bottle.
The foundational idea is, "the primary purpose of a woman's body is for women to live, not for others to pick apart for approval".
I want to live in a world where a young woman can go out and get groceries or walk to a friend's house or go swimming without being interrupted every five minutes by the stranger living in her skull demanding that she appear beautiful at every possibly moment
Iâve been cackling about this for like five minutes now
[Video caption:
O-okay, letâs get into this, shall we?
*grumbling* Would you rather work for Lex Luthor or the Joker- *shouting* Lex Luthor, by like, a fucking mile!
Yes, yes, working for Lex Luthor is basically like being an Amazon employee that makes weapons of mass destruction, which is bad. Lex is like Donald Trump mixed with Mark Zuckerberg mixed with Jeffrey fucking Bezos, itâs not a great mix. He does not treat his henchmen well. Their lives still suck, and they are probably monitored on how long they take piss breaks for.
But letâs analyze what working for Lex Luthor is like versus the fucking Joker. With Lex you probably get a dental plan, a health plan, a paycheck, and the guy that youâre fighting really cares about human life. Superman will hit you just long enough to knock you out, so youâre not a treat, so he can stop the problem.
If you work for the Joker, your payment is youâre not fucking dead. You say one wrong thing? Bang. You donât laugh at his jokes? Bang! You do laugh at his jokes? Bang! You think Joker gives a fuck about a henchman?
Whoâs Lex Luthorâs right-hand-man? Itâs a woman, you sexist, her name is Mercy, sheâs awesome. Whoâs Jokerâs right-hand-man? Bob? Nah, heâs dead. Harley? Tried to kill her multiple times. Slappy? Who the fuck is Slappy?
The best case scenario of working for the Joker is that you fight the fucking Batman! And that presents its own fucking list of problems. If you stop Superman as a Lex Luthor henchman, Lexâll be pissed, but heâll be at least happy that Superman was caught. If you stop Batman as a Joker henchman, you better have a fucking coffin picked out yesterday.
This isnât a fun hypothetical question, this is a screening technique that the doctors at Arkham use to determine your mental health! There is a right and a wrong answer to this question, and the correct one is Lex fucking Luthor. Thank you for coming to my fucking Ted Talk, have a nice day.
End caption.]
Bitch neither I work for Wayne Industries, they got better offers than work these clowns:
batmans secret special attack is offering all of his enemys henchmen a living wage and guaranteed healthcare