Art by OTTOWL, posted with permission
âHe pointed the wand very carefully into the boyâs face: he wanted to see it happen, the destruction of this one, inexplicable danger.â
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Art by OTTOWL, posted with permission
âHe pointed the wand very carefully into the boyâs face: he wanted to see it happen, the destruction of this one, inexplicable danger.â

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Just waiting for my Viktor Krum to come into my life.
iâve just had a headcanon that lily also wears glasses. not all the time, only when she has to read something and make potions.Â
just a portrait (taken by james) to illustrate the concept. he loves when sheâs wearing it too.
Idea: Harry Potter but itâs narrated by John Mulaney.
âHarry kept all of his emotions in his chest. And one day he will die.â
YOU WANT IT? *Harry throws the elder wand away from Voldemort* GO AND G E T I T
And then Harry said,He wouldnât go to the forbidden forest again,you know like a liar.
Ron looked around the hospital wing, unsure if Umbridge was still staying there. He leaned in conspiratorially. "Hey, has uh... has anyone seen the--?" He cut himself off to make a clopping noise with his tongue, looking around nervously as he did.
there are only two genders: in love with minerva mcgonagall and wrong

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Dumbledore: Severus Iâm still missing your photo for this yearâs faculty newsletter
Severus: my apologies here it is
Dumbledore: you canât even see half of your face. Maybe one less dramatic?
Severus: of course, headmaster.
Severus:
Dumbledore: I said less dramatic and preferably one where youâre not so alarmed
Severus:Â
Dumbledore: did you have a photoshoot or something
Severus:
Dumbledore: what no Severus you are not in a boy band what is this pose wait youâre not in one are y-
Severus:
Dumbledore: are those special effects
Severus:
Dumbledore: cool but still a no
Severus:
Dumbledore: dramatic and very fitting for you but you canât have fanart as your faculty photo who even is your fan and why donât I have fanart
Severus:
Dumbledore: bold choice going with the profile, I admit I didnât think youâd go for it, but you canât have a dramatic death quote on your photo either this is a school for children they still have hope at least until their first class with you
Severus:
Dumbledore: *sigh*
Severus:
Dumbledore: why is the school on fire
Severus:
Dumbledore: is that a Death Eater meeting
Severus:
Dumbledore: oh my godÂ
Severus:
Dumbledore: seriously did you have a photoshoot
Severus:
Dumbledore: artsy but no
Severus:
Dumbledore: is that a screenshot
Severus:
Dumbledore: please stop
Severus:
Dumbledore: thatâs it Iâm taking away your photoshop privileges in the muggle studies computer lab
Severus:
Dumbledore: okay you know what fine thatâll do
Severus:
Dumbledore: no.
Severus:
Dumbledore: where are these all coming from
Severus:
Dumbledore:Â YOU KNOW WHAT NEVER MIND FORGET I ASKED YOU DONâT NEED A PHOTO
Severus:
I LOVE this!
LOL! Awesome! đđđ
Severus Snape is incapable of being anything other than dramatic.
ITS TIME ITS TIME ITS T I M E
NO ITâS TOO EARLY STOP RIGHT THERE
ITâS TIME
IT IS TIME
ITâS TIME
ITâS TIME
ITâS TIME
ITâS TIME
ITâS NOT TIME ITâS JULY
ITâS TIME
ITâS TIME
ITâS TIME
ITâS TIME
ITâS TOO DAMN EARLY. STOP.
ITS TIME. ITS BEEN TIME FOR MONTHS.
ITâS TIME GUYS
ITS TIME
ITâS TIME YâALL
IT IS TIME
ITS TI M E
HAPPY HALLOWEEN FUCKERS
ITS TIME
ITS TIME YOU FUCKERS
ITâS TIME ASSHOLES
ITS TIME
Its time my friends
ITS TIME
ITâS TIME
ITâS TIME
ITS NOT TIME YET JUST WAIT PLEASE
ITâS TIME
FOOLS, IT IS ALWAYS TIME
THEREâS ONLY THREE MONTHS TILL HALLOWEENÂ
IT IS TIME
ITâS TIME ITâS TIME ITâS TIME
It is tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiime!!!
Fantasy and science fiction are often grouped together as a single genre, especially when looking at them from an academic context, as âSpeculative Fictionâ. In essence, the core of speculative fiction is the question âwhat if?â
In light of that, I present to you: fan fiction.
Thereâs often a tendency in academic and literary circles to look down your nose at this accessible, audience-driven form, but I think we need to look at it properly.
Fan fiction is one of the purest expressions of that question of speculative fiction, of the question âwhat if?â
Take a world and a story you love, delve into it, look at it, and finally, find a question. Ask âwhat if?â. What if theyâd met earlier? What if theyâd realised in time? What if they fell in love?
Fan fiction is the exploration of the possible.Â
Exactly. Speculative fiction itself is in many ways actually just fanfiction for the real world, with varying degrees of canon-compliance.
theyâre not nearly as sneaky as they think they are
âIn March several of the mandrakes threw a loud and raucous party in greenhouse three. This made Professor Sprout very happy.â Do you have any ideas on what this moment from chamber of secrets might have looked like?
probably like this
THE FUCKING CAR LOT MAN

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Kit and I made a meme. The format is Thing and Thing's two conflicting desires. I've included the blank in case you want to do your own.
harry and hermione teamed up to publish a book: All You Ever Wanted To Know About The Wizarding World But Were Afraid To Ask - A Guide For Confused Muggleborns
Somewhat unpopular headcanon
Remus Lupin fucking loved Quidditch so much. He wasn't any good on a broom, but who was there screaming James's name when he scored? Who regularly painted his face in team colors? Who once punched Kingsley in the face on accident because he was first pumping so hard?
Anyway, Remus gets to feel raw excitement so rarely and it makes my heart glow thinking about him letting go for once.
Why did Voldemort force Peter to move in with Snape?
Long ago, I said my next piece would be about why Peter went back to Voldemort. HOWEVER there has been some recent interest from readers regarding the subject of Snape and Peter living together, and Iâm grateful for the encouragement and for the reminder! Itâs been a while since Iâve added a new essay to the bunch, and I admit that this is one of the periods of Peterâs life (not to mention a plot of Voldemortâs) that I find especially fascinating.
Voldemortâs decision to place Peter at Spinnerâs End likely happened immediately after the events at the Little Hangleton graveyard in Goblet of Fire: Voldemort has a body now. He no longer requires full-time care, nor would he want to remind his followers that he ever needed itâit wouldnât do to have Peter remain by his side. Plus, all this one-on-one time and physical/magical reliance has given Peter an unusual amount of knowledge about Voldemort, and perhaps the knowledge has made PeterâŚoverly familiar. So, Voldemort removes Peter to Spinnerâs End, and likely moves back into the Riddle House in Little Hangleton by himself.*
*Between the World Cup and Triwizard Tournament, Voldemort and Peter were living at Barty Crouch Srâs home, which has now been compromised due to Barty Jrâs arrest. Voldemort doesnât move into Malfoy Manor until right before Deathly Hallows begins.
Therefore, Peter is out of a job. I expect that Peterâwith his fancy silver hand and Voldemortâs apparent gratitudeâthought that he would now take his place at the Adult Table with the rest of the still-loyal first-tier Death Eaters that showed up at Little Hangleton when Voldemort called them. ButâŚno.
Instead, Voldemort removes Peter from the Inner Circle, where all the action is happening and the plans are being made, and places him not only in Snapeâs company, but in Snapeâs own house, and thereforeâit could be arguedâunder Snapeâs authority.Â
Snape is, admittedly, not in the most secure position among the Death Eaters and Voldemort. Heâs only just reemerged after living in essentially Dumbledoreâs lap for the last 15 years. But he has over a decade of information that is valuable to Voldemort, and Voldemort isnât foolish enough to disregard that, even if he doesnât fully trust Snape (yet).
I suspect Voldemort placed Snape and Peter together for a couple reasons:
1. to have them spy on each other;
2. to get Peter out of his hair (or lack thereof), but not out of his orbit;
3. to stir shit.
Voldemort doesnât fully trust Snape yetâhe needs to hear some of that alleged Dumbledore/Order information firstâand heâs never seen Peter operating as a full-time Death Eater**; thereâs plenty of reason to believe that Peter might try to make a run for it.
**Unlike some, I donât believe Peter was a fully Marked Death Eater until after Voldemort regained a body. I donât think he was involved with/loyal to Voldemort at all during the First Warâhe spilled the beans to save his own life, not out of loyalty to or love of evil.
It kills two birds with one stone to give these men the task of checking up on each otherâit fosters competition, and it doesnât require any extra manpower. Each takes care of the other.
Thereâs a sort of apocryphal legend about Pharoahs and their tombs. Iâm not sure how true it is, but it illustrates my next point well. When a Pharoahâalong with an architectâdesigned and built his tomb, he wanted to ensure that his was the largest, grandest, and most spectacular tomb that had ever come before or after. So, when the Pharoah died, the architect might be killed and placed in the tomb with the Pharoah. This way, the royal architect would never be able to improve upon that which he had made, and never share the secrets of the Pharoahâs tomb with anyone else.
This is the principle upon which Voldemort is working with regards to removing Peter from his side and his confidence. Peter, frankly, knows too much. He was Voldemortâs sole confident for nearly a year.
It is EXTREMELY likely that Peter is the only Death Eater who is clearly aware that Voldemort has not only one Horcrux, but several.^ Peter likely knows how Horcruxes are made and was almost certainly there when Nagini was made into one. He has seen Voldemort at his most vulnerable as well as at his most evil. Peter has proven himself not only a competent wizard, but an extraordinary one. Not to mention a dogged survivor!
^Snape doesnât become aware of this until Dumbledore shows up with a rotting hand and the Peverell ring between OotP and HBP.
Peterâs not worth killing, either. A man who is willing to do anything to live is a valuable tool for someone like Lord Voldemort. Peter has proven that heâs willing to do the dirty work. (Bertha Jorkins, for example.)^^
^^In this way, Peter:Voldemort::Snape:Dumbledore. Itâs a delicious and compelling parallel that lends itself beautifully to this circumstance.
Besides, Voldemort created his own insurance in the form of the silver hand, which seems to be programmed to kill Peter should he show an inclination to disobey Voldemort. Regarding the circumstances of Peterâs death as a consequence of sparing Harryâs life, thereâs some confusion regarding the Life Debt business, but both the text and Pottermore heavily imply (or claim outright) that Peter did indeed show Harry a moment of mercyâ , and the hand turned on him and strangled him to death as punishment for that mercy.
â The canon text grants this only grudginglyâPeter himself seems surprised to have done it, which muddies the waters a bit re: the hand and its motives/purpose.
Now, to my third point:
Almost nobody would argue with the idea that Voldemort is a raging drama queen. So when I say Voldemort was absolutely stirring shit by putting Snape and Peter under the same roof, you shouldnât find it at all surprising.
Itâs not just the fact that Peter ran with the two boys that made Snapeâs life a living hell for almost a decade (and contributed to that hell, Iâm sure, in his own right), not to mention with the werewolf who nearlyâthrough no fault of Remusâs ownâkilled Snape. By the time Goblet of Fire ends, Snape is well aware that for all of his other awful and infuriating personality traits, Sirius is indeed innocent of betraying the Potters. Which can mean only one thing:
Snape knows that Peter Pettigrew is the one responsible for Lilyâs death.
Snapeâs feelings for and relationship to Lily were not a secret, especially to Voldemort (since Snape asked him to spare Lilyâs life) and to the people Snape went to school withâespecially James, who was fixated on and jealous of Snape and Lilyâs friendship. Peter would, of course, be aware. I have no doubt that Peter immediately realized the position he was being put in when Voldemort ordered him to live with Snape in Spinnerâs End, and Iâm sure he was quite rightly nervous.
Isnât that a delightful little mindfuck move on Voldemortâs part? Putting Snape and Peter together in time-out is a very practical punishment. He puts Snape with his childhood tormentor and the one who got the woman he loved killed, as punishment for perceived abandonment. And naturally Voldemort would be aware that Snape would hate and resent Peter because of their shared childhood and because of Lily; so what a fitting punishment for Peter, who is a man terrified that his past will catch up to him. All because he dared to witness Voldemort at his weakest. (Voldemort is SO petty, you guys.) And it dovetails so nicely with the primary reasons for placing them together: both Snape and Peter will be on edge, each desperate to prove his own loyalties as well as extra sensitive to any flaw in his roommateâs.
But Snape canât let on that Lilyâs death bothers him, nor murder Peter and risk outing himself as disloyal to Voldemort and the Death Eaters. What Snape can do, however, is make Peterâs time in Spinnerâs End unpleasant and irritating. And the chapter Spinnerâs End establishes exactly that: Snape treats Peter like a servant, andâas he does to Bellatrixâlikely lords his own usefulness to Voldemort (and therefore, his arguably larger worth to him) over Peterâs head in the process.
And Peter canât fight back. Heâs not an idiotâheâs the kind of guy who knows when he knows too much. As to why he puts up with Snape treating him like shit, on one hand, Iâm sure Peter is aware he deserves it (and besides, itâs only a couple months until Hogwarts is back in session). On the other, itâs not going to help him one whit to go complaining to Voldemort. As Peterâs been excused from the field of duty (and would frankly be too conspicuousâĄ), he canât do anything to earn a reward, and unless he has rock-hard evidence that Snape is a traitor to Voldemort, Peter knows heâs stuck where he is. Which is exactly why he puts so much effort into spying on Snape in the hopes of catching him out and taking the opportunity to restore himself in Voldemortâs good graces. (Frankly, I wouldnât be surprised if Voldemort suggested that was a Very Important Job and the only way for Peter to make his way back to the Adult Table.)
âĄSirius parallel!
Unfortunately, we only get a tiny glimpse into the life that Snape and Peter had made! Thereâs a massive well of tantalizing possibilities here regarding their interactions in Spinnerâs Endâhow do you think it went? (I have a pet theory that they ended up tolerating each other quite wellâtheyâre both DEEPLY lonely men with a great deal of shared history and references. I think thereâs a lot about each other that they understand, which can, of course, be repulsive in this instance, but when it comes to a roommate, sometimes you also have to get on with it and cook a shared dinner and chat about the dayâs events.)
I always love hearing your reactions, questions, and observations on these essaysâplease do keep them coming!
Brilliant as always!
Snape and Wormtail in a flatshare, thereâs only one bed
Waiting for the Snivvytail slash fics
SoooâŚI did a thingâŚ
So, I remember about a week ago I started this thing and I finished it up today. Itâs just a helpful little list of your favorite (or least favorite) Harry Potter charactersâ Birthdays!
Of course, not ALL of them are here (I really wanted to know Queenie and Jacobâs!). I got all of this information off of the Harry Potter Wiki. Also, some donât have the birth year, and donât have an age, but I put them on the list anyway just because (I HATE that we donât know Teddy Lupinâs actual day of birth!)đ
The list details theyâre CURRENT age (example: on McGonagall it says she is 82, but will turn 83 on October 4th, 2018)
Iâm thinking about doing a birthday post for each character, or at least the characters I care about (I ainât doing one for Umbridge, sorry)
I already have plans for Ginny and Tina, so be sure to look out for them in the future!
Edit: Hermione was born in â79, so her current age is actually 38 and will turn 39.

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Another my Headcanon is: During the summer holidays, the marauders never ceased to keep in touch. There were scores of letters throughout the summer; in some cases they managed to send even more than one letter a day. The slowest to answer was always Moony, not only because he was the most long-winded, but also because he was the only one who remembered feeding the owls, that always got irritated and tired from long journeys all over England .
Sirius: *staring at the ceiling in their dorm* You know what girls love?
James: Respect?
Peter: Equality?
Remus: Being able to do whatever they want with their lives, while no man has a say in whatâs best for them?
Sirius: I was going to say when I run my fingers through my hair, but go off I guess.