Asexual Monster Fucker

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We can't wait to get the WT ball rolling this year!

-Mods Surro, Yenn, Vanne and Kitty <3

Are you happy with it?

^^^^^^

https://wheelofnames.com/5k9-xsu

love smashing my hyperfixations together ESPECIALLY when the vibes are so abhorrently different. i've been locked in on this for the past week

for @corrodedcoffinfest day 6 prompt 'family video'

rated t | 923 words | no cw | tags: platonic stobin, jeff is the third wheel to their platonic marriage

📼📼📼📼📼📼📼📼📼📼📼📼📼📼📼

Jeff hates this job so much. He really hates that he’s the youngest person working here and Keith seems to think that means he can do all the heavy lifting.

He owed Jeff’s dad a favor after he approved a business loan at the bank for him when he probably shouldn’t have. So, Jeff has a minimum wage job while all his friends are enjoying summer vacation. He’s thrilled.

Though he’s pretty glad the job at Scoops Ahoy didn’t work out. He wouldn’t have wanted to be at the mall when that fire happened.

“Need you to train the newbies tomorrow,” Keith says as he locks up for the night. “The girl will be fine, the guy is like her lost puppy. Don’t know why she bothers with him. He’s an idiot.”

Right, the new people start tomorrow.

“Anyone I might know?” Jeff asks as he looks around for his mom’s car. She’s late again, but he doesn’t mind too much. He could use some fresh air while he waits for her to get here.

“Steve Harrington and Robin something or other. She’s your age, so I guess you’re probably in classes together,” Keith hands him the key. “You’re opening and I forgot the spare. Feel free to fire Harrington if he’s too stupid to figure out how to press rewind.”

Jeff’s pretty sure even Steve can figure that out, but he doesn’t care to argue with Keith. Not when he can see the headlights of his mom’s car turning into the parking lot.

—

“And that’s really it. Any questions?”

Robin shakes her head. Steve shakes his head. Jeff thinks it’s a bit weird that Steve even needs a job, but maybe he just needs to kill some time now that he’s graduated.

There’s been rumors that his parents cut him off when he finished school and didn’t have plans to go to college, but Jeff doesn’t think it’s true. Or at least not completely.

A part of him wonders if Gareth started it just to see if it would get anywhere. He likes to do stupid shit out of boredom.

“I’m going on my lunch. Let me know if you need me.”

He hides in the office and hopes they don’t need him. Tuesdays are pretty slow, so he’d be surprised if they had more than one or two customers.

He calls Eddie to make sure they’re still on for band practice tomorrow in his garage. He calls his mom to remind her he’s off at six tonight and needs a ride. And then he manages to eat the sandwich he brought from home before there’s a knock on the door.

Robin steps in with an awkward wave and smile.

“Everything okay?” Jeff asks around a mouthful of food.

“I may have accidentally checked out some movies.”

“Oh. No big deal. I’ll show you how to fix it in a few minutes,” Jeff smiles at her reassuringly. “It’s easy.”

“Uh. Well.” Robin bounces on her feet. “I may have accidentally…checked out all of the movies.”

“Like all of the ones that were on the cart? That’s okay. Accidents happen.”

“She checked out all of the movies in the store,” Steve says as he steps in, hands settling on his hips. “I don’t know how.”

“I…didn’t know that was possible,” Jeff admits as he sets the last few bites of his sandwich back in the baggie and stands up. “Are you sure that’s what happened?”

“Yep. I tried to start checking them back in, but there’s an error,” Steve explains. He nudges Robin’s arm, letting it rest there for a moment. Jeff notices but doesn’t say anything. “I’ll fix it if you can show me how.”

Jeff shakes his head. “I don’t think this has ever happened. We might have to call—“

“No!” They both yell. Jeff raises a brow. “Please. I’m sure we can figure it out together,” Robin continues. Steve nods along next to her.

He sighs and gestures for them to go back to the counter.

The fix is actually pretty simple once he gets eyes on it. He’s kind of a computer nerd. Keith probably keeps him around for that more than the favor he owed his dad at this point. But it will take a few hours because they have to go by genre and count inventory on the shelves to make sure they don’t accidentally check something in that’s still with a customer. He leaves them to it while he handles actual customers coming in.

By the end of his shift, they’re done and everything is back to normal. Keith arrives to close and they silently agree not to speak of it at all.

The truth is, even with the problem, and expecting the worst, he had the most fun he’s ever had while working alongside Steve and Robin. They’re funny, even when they don’t mean to be. They’re nice, even though Jeff always thought Steve had a massive attitude in high school. That seems to have cleared itself up. They’re also very entertaining as a pair. He accidentally called them a couple earlier and got the dirtiest look from Robin and a very stern ‘no way, dude’ from Steve.

Silver Linin', Climin' On My Desire by @salamandergoo

Dana Evans/Perlah

Summary: It starts with a hug on the roof, fireworks a welcome cacophony. It starts with a touch, then another, more than Dana can count. In a whirlwind, she’s looking at Perlah in a whole new light and can’t put her finger on why.

Rating: Teen & Up

Mid evolution for my fire starter

Jack barely leans closer to whisper, "you can either walk into the bathroom on your own will, or I can pull you in there. Either way, you're not leaving my ER with a full bladder."

Robby picks the easy route; shuffles his way non-too slowly into what is supposed to be a single occupant restroom. Doesn't have to wait long for Jack to slip in behind him and herd him towards the single urinal in the corner, thick fingers unbuckling and opening Robby's fly with practiced ease. Abbot hooks his chin over Robby's shoulder when he helpfully widens his stance enough for Abbot to reach, slips his hand down the front of the older man's boxers.

If asked, Jack will freely admit to taking his time with his hand down Robby's boxers. He knows he's taking his sweet time pulling him out, cupping and fondling the soft shaft until he's satisfied with the amount of wiggle in Robby's hips before he holds him properly- pushes the worn waistband down and hooks it behind his balls for better clearance.

And Robby won't freely admit to the fact that he is a bit pee shy. No matter how bad he has to go, it always takes him a good minute for his body to let go, finally relax enough to participate in a basic bodily function. Jack is happy to wait. Happier to gently rub at Robby's belly to help him relax. Up and down. Up and down. Fingers scraping through the thick, coarse, deliciously graying layer of belly hair. Eyes focused on the exposed tip of Robby's thick cock. Just until the first dribble makes its appearance, when Robby sags back against his chest and lets out that soft sigh, then Jack is firmly rubbing low on his belly. Transverse, hip to hip with a bit of added pressure on the notable firmness of his full bladder.

Robby lets out a longer relieved sigh as his stream finally gets strong enough to hit the back wall of the porcelain dish in front of him, and Jack takes that as the tell that it is: Robby wouldn't be able to stop if he wanted to, he can't escape Jack's coming lecture.

"You know I hate that you hold it so long," softly murmured in his ear, drawing goosebumps to the surface of his skin. "Gonna give yourself BPH- actually, I'm sure you already have it. Last time I was feeling around in there, your prostate was much easier to find. And I know I can't chalk it up to knowing your body so well," Jack nips at the thin, freckled skin of Robby's nape, sinks his teeth in just hard enough to leave a faint bruise that should be gone by morning. Eyes still focused on the now steady stream, Jack makes a mental note of the color. Four- No, probably five. Jack huffs. Idiot.

With no sign of Robby being anywhere near done, Jack knows he has a little more time to maybe-possibly-hopefully get through his husband's thick skull about taking care of his bladder and surrounding organs.

"Holding it for long periods does the same thing as pushing. You're just weakening the muscles, which leads to what?"

"I think I'd know if I was going inco-"

"Shut up. Don't talk back to me when you're the one vulnerable. You'll got fucking incontinence by the end of the year if you keep this up," Jack applies pressure with his fingertips into the softening bulb of Robby's bladder through the layer of middle-aged weight, really digs them in to make Robby whimper. His stream strengthens with the added pressure, Robby shuffles his feet on the tiles in pain. Jack lets up after only a second. "I don't think you want to be walking around dribbling piss into your pants all day, and I know you're too proud to wear incontinence underwear, so how about you listen to me for one on this and- Stop. Fucking. Holding. It."

Each word earns Robby an increasingly incessant roll of Abbot's hips against his ass and a harsh bite to scold the statement into his brain. Driving the point home.

Eyes still focused on the steady stream; Jack makes a mental note of the color. Four- No, probably five. Jack huffs. Idiot.

"You need to either slow down on the coffee or up your water intake to outweigh the acid."

There's a long beat of silence as Robby's stream slowly pitters out; drawing a close to Abbot's impromptu Urology lecture. Before the last of his business if through, Robby tips his head back against Jack's shoulder and groans, happy and sated, comfortable without the thorn in his abdomen shoot pain into his nerves. Taken care of like he so desperately craves-