not my blog

(goverment voice) we need to protect the children from pornography so our plan is to remove their eyes so they would never see something so traumatic. if you are against removing children's eyes you are basically a pedophile

honestly the concept of Thjazi is maybe one of the best DM choices to make ever. what if you had a guy who was the coolest person ever. what if you showed him dying in the first 15 minutes of the campaign. what if even the people who hate him feel, even after he has died, that somehow he still got the upper hand. master class in How To Make A Magnificent Bastard NPC Without Dominating The Campaign. guy of all time.

sometimes i think about gay people who lived centuries ago who thought they were all alone who imagined a world where they could live openly as themselves who met in secret spoke in code defied everything and everyone just to exist and i’m like..i gotta sit down. whew i gotta sit down

the persecution of lefthandedness is insane to think about because it was so intense for so long, in some places still is, without any clear profit motivation. sheer love of the game. as late as the 70s at least they were smacking my stepdad's hands for it with a wooden ruler at school, to this day he's in weird ambidexterity situation where he's not great with either side and notably clumsy due to poor hand-eye coordination. just wtf

Deutsche Bahn my beloathed

your weird obsession with having a fully formed white picket fence found family who all speak like they've inhaled their therapist who you subconsciously want to be adopted into is ruining your ability to interact with the source material

i've searched every combination of words imaginable and i still can't find that gif of the german star trek parody where gay spock is quickly drinking coffee and smoking freaking out PLEASE send it to me i need it urgently

Not much of a star trek fan so correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like saying "gay spock" is a bit like saying "green shrek", no?

everyone’s always talking about how cute harp babies are but oh my golly the adults are so CUTE as well!!!

stop. analyse that text through the lens of its author's intentions and original historical context. okay now take the author out back and kill them dead and analyse that text as though it were published by your mutual yesterday and is in direct conversation the contemporary discourse that's most relevant to your life. okay now pick your favorite angle of interpretation and come up with the strongest possible argument against it. now imagine that the text is your best friend and that it means you well and that you naturally give it every benefit of the doubt because you're on its side and you want the best for it. now imagine that the text wants you dead and it'll eat you if you don't eat it first. now pretend that you found this text locked away in a cave with no evidence of when or where it came from and you have to divine its meaning solely through its internal coherence and nothing else. okay now address the elephant in the room aspect of the text you've been ignoring because you find it boring or confusing or uncomfortable and become the number one expert on it. now spend forty minutes assigning all the characters dnd classes with at least three sentences of reasoning each. okay now do the cha cha slide.

saw a comment that misspelled “kind gesture” as “kind jester” and am now imagining a beautiful world where we praise good samaritans by calling them kind jesters. good on you, you gentle fool. you’ve made the world a sweeter and sillier place.