:D

my fatal flaw is that if i don't want to do something i just won't do it like mama raised a quitter for sure.. i'll be doing something and suddenly be like damn what if i just didn't 🤔. very freeing but also i suffer so many consequences

Being a flop changed my life. The world is not my oyster, I am glowing. I walked into a pole this morning. There's very little I wouldn't do for $1,000

Times are hard at the cafe so they only got Something bagels

literally everyone loves heated rivalry until lena dunham makes a gay porn joke at taylor swift's wedding

his wife has filled THEIR house with ANTIQUES. to AVOID DAMAGING HER VALUABLES i fuck him on the floor

#feminist retelling

Im basically like if a deadbeat dad was your friend .

Hello Squirt sorry i havent touched base in a while haha ❤️ still down to play some ranked games with your old man? (Goes missing and doesnt talk to you for months)

Sometimes you will be a lesbian to your parents and a straight man to your partners parents and a gay man to your partner and a woman to your grandparents and out to your friends and stealth to your classmates and a nice young lady to the cashier at the coffee shop and then people on your computer will ask you to choose which of these identities you ACTUALLY are and which you are Appropriating The Oppression Of because don’t you know they contract each other. You can only be one thing solidly forever

sodom vs gomorrah playing at the world cup tomorrow

Pain = Fun

i think fat girls should walk around in crop tops booty shorts buzzcuts dyed hair piercings no bra killing and maiming all who stand in their way with weapons before sitting down for some yummy ice cream and so forth. it's the only way.

IDENTITY EMERGES ORGANICALLY FROM ACTION

IF YOU DONT DO ANYTHING YOU ARENT ANYONE. SORRY

This is the Summer we all regrow our tails