Creature of the Dark

I am an agoraphobic indigenous Kanienʼkehá:ka (Mohawk) mixed lesbian who has fought for several years a worsening health condition that is currently killing me. The point of no return is not that far away. I have spent years exhausting any paths and means to get help, enduring extreme and near endless pain. I have reached the critical point I have feared all this time. And to make matters worst, the family responsible for inflicting a lifetime of abuse on me is stalking me heavily online, which has not only exacerbated my agoraphobia, but has also made the efforts to build this harder than I could describe. Know that I share as many details as I can while seeking to avoid undermining my immediate safety, I hope you understand. This post is a highly abridged version of the content in the link below ❤

If you have been following me for a while, you are familiar with my struggle and saw me talking about it throughout the years. There are no other options or help besides this, besides you. I need your help or I'm going to die, this is the last chance I have left. I know you may be inclined to share and move on, but I am asking you to pause and think if you have a dollar that could make all the difference.

If you yourself have a health condition, I salute you for fighting your own battle. Regardless of whether you donate or not, if you read this far, know that you are loved.

A warm thank you to @transmechanicus & @mightyjoke , the kind souls who made this possible. I would be lost and doomed without your help. Attempting to save a human being's life is no small act.

(This is the new updated fundraiser as of April 14th, 2025. Please don't put tags unless it is to comment something. Kind words are appreciated.)

But the long deployments take a toll on the crews and Marines, who had planned for a normal rotation and are now months past their initial scheduled return home.

“You don’t sign up for an easy time, you know any deployment is going to be uncertain,” said Joe Plenzler, a retired Marine Corps officer. “But extending deployments like this, when it feels really open-ended, that starts to bleed into retention. How much more likely am I able to convince my family to do another enlistment and stick with it?”

oh wow the glass-tower office buildings we constructed when we thought air conditioning and central heating would never have downsides...have downsides?

and we're still building them?

while the Victorian house museum where I work, with thick walls and small windows and big wooden shutters stays ~10 degrees above (winter) or below (summer) the outside temperature for days on end with no help at all?

uh. okay then

Somewhat predictably, yet against my hopes, the day after acute stress I feel like shit. Had to cancel all my evening plans for Post Traumatic Tummy Hurt, only just easing. Both cats are perfectly fine with this state of affairs because they get Couch Time.

(Sophie is back to her normal self! I'll have to keep an eye out Sunday afternoon because apparently symptoms can re-occur 72 hours later, but past that point we'll be truly out of the woods.)