yâall im on the sparknotes twitter and i am losing my goddamn mind

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@titansinthewalls
yâall im on the sparknotes twitter and i am losing my goddamn mind

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holy shit
transcription: âdude if he fucks up mac and che- ⌠GARFIELD? GARFIELD!? NO! WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU? BEEL GATES? NO, wuh-WAIT, THATâS MY GAMECUBE YOU BITCH!!!! huoAHWHO THE FUCK ARE YOU!? hWAIT NO GARFIELD IS ON FIRE⌠DIO! NO! WH
*googles âhow to nominate reporter for Peabody Awardâ* x
I literally just got dehydrated from all the salt in that one paragraph

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i, and i canât emphasize this enough, would literally die for merlin
why do jellyfish only sting when theres physical contact
why doesnt the electricity just surge throughout the entire ocean
why dont jellyfish rule the world
Fun fact! Â Jellyfish donât use electricity to sting you. Â Whenever they feel pressure against their tentacles, it causes its cells to rapidly send out these stingers into your skin that then release its venom. Â Like this:
#science tumblr to save the day from inaccuracies
#THATâS WORSE
They are called nematocysts. They are what make box jellies and other fun lil critters so dangerous, because without these wee little daggers, the venom would have no way to get into your skin. And yet something as thin as nylon stockings or pantyhose is enough to protect you, they are so small. So if youâre scared of jellyfish? Wear sexy sheer undergarments into the sea like the regal creature you are.
Iâm going to reblog this again because that is some of the best advice I have ever gotten on this blog.
the switch from âa girl worth fighting forâ to coming upon the decimated village in mulan is THE MOST kick-in-the-teeth mood change IN ALL OF CINEMA
That scene shift did more for our generationâs understanding of the horror of war in ten seconds than Game of Thrones did in eight seasons, and it did it without showing us a single dead body.Â
OKAY BUT HOLD ON THOUGH.
Iâve spent the past⌠five? Letâs say five - the past five years analyzing the structure of Disney Musicals as part of the process to write my own/a parody of them, and the thing is that all the modern ones have roughly the same number of songs - except Mulan.
Mulan has about half, because after AGWFF ends with that unresolved final phrase, there are no more songs until the end credits, which isnât even sung in-universe.
Mulan wasnât even the REALM of fucking around - when they arrive at that village, when the true horrors of war are brought into the story, not only does it interrupt THAT song, it breaks the entire fucking mold - the movieâs damn genre changes; it is no longer a musical.
And the Huns represent this from the start - Jafar and Hades are notable for not having proper villain songs, but Jafar does get his Prince Ali refrain and Hades and his plan get sung ABOUT by the muses. No scene with the Huns has any singing, they are mentioned once in song (the second line of Man, natch), and they of all Disney Villains are probably the most serious - no jokes, no witty asides, no sassy delivery of dry humor. The Huns are an invading army who plan to straight up kill a fuckton of people, including children, and AGWFFâs sudden end is the moment when our happy go lucky MUSICAL protagonists finally come in contact with them and their work directly - and it breaks them. Because shit like the Huns cannot exist in happy go lucky musical world. They just exist in our world. The real world. And you canât sing your problems away here.
The end of A Girl Worth Fighting For is a brilliant use of metanarrative sensibilities to convey a message. It is utterly perfect.
Daaaamn, Tony. Thatâs fucking deep, my guy
I didnât spend two years and thousands of dollars on a Masterâs Degree in literature to NOT over analyze every text I engage with.
After singing earlier about being âmade a man (letâs read: adult)â, they succeed only in some respects until this shock makes them grow up REAL fast. Itâs sobering, itâs disillusioning, and it ages them.
my list, in no particular order, of when a soundtrack has absolutely went off itâs tits to give some of the best moments in any media.
infamous quicksilver scene from x-men apocalypse (âsweet dreams are made of thisâ playing as he saves everyone from the manor)
the inexplicable use of supermassive black hole by muse in twilight during the baseball scene
the scene in umbrella academy where five fucks up all those agents in the diner while âistanbul (not constantinople)â plays in the background
whatâs up danger playing from into the spiderverse when miles takes the leap of faith
the start of spiderman homecoming when they played the orchestral version of the spiderman theme for the first time
sweet victory
âsitting there useless as two shits hey, turn around bend over iâll show you where my shoe fitsâ
the part in rwby where they slingshot ruby at the nevermore while the final part of red like roses pt.2 plays, the guitars blaring as she goes up the cliff and ending with the beheading
âI AM MOANAâ
busted from phineas and ferb
the end of guardians of the galaxy volume 2 where they start playing father and son
the part in thor ragnarok when hela asks thor âwhat were you the god of again?â before thor attacks her and starts going batshit crazy on the undead army while led zeppelinâs immigrant song plays
as this is by no means a comprehensive list, please add any soundtrack moments that were so Fucking Good they made you have a physical reaction.
Someone I know likes to say this while driving and everyone in the car panics. I thought it fits Joseph.

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Hot take but the reason why weâre all obsessed with the idea of a team of heroes living in the same home with their wacky shennagins and family dynamic is because we grew up with the original Teen Titans series.
Ngl I thought this was gonna be a post about how none of us have stable home lives
@shizonrhu
good content
this is somehow already a classic short video
This looks like it was shot in 2019 and 2006 all at once
Biggest fucking mood.
Theyâre also meant for hiltops, not small rooms. Cant get the right reverb with all that echo.
theyâre also meant to make you fight the english. donât forget that part.
My fav bagpipe player was a dude who would go out to the middle of a soccer field near my college apartment on Sunday. No one was using the field and heâd just be out there playing his heart out and the sound were just spread out over the plains. Iâd be working on art for class so Iâd open the window and listen. I still have fond memories of the day a kid biked up to the edge of the field, ran over to the bagpiper and the music stopped for a moment and as they talked. I couldnât hear it but I had assumed the worst, that someone had decided to tell him to stop playing. Instead after the pause the musician seemed to nod, readjusted his bagpipes and started belting out the Star Wars theme.Â

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Concept: Some jackass shows Bucky how to make a blog and it becomes really popular. Not because itâs the blog of James Buchanan Barnes, American Legend, War Hero, Infamous Assassin, Alleged Terrorist. Nobody even knows itâs his blog. It gets really popular because people think itâs a really great shitpost generator or something. Because Bucky is just a Weird Fucking Person and everything he posts on his fucking personal blog comes off as somewhere between dril and Jaden Smith and people are like âthis is some quality garbage right hereâ and thus Accidental Memelord Bucky is born.
Bucky posts things like
âWhat is wrong with bananas. I ate a banana today and it was Wrong. America whyâ
âEvery time I put on my eye makeup it gets bigger. My whole face is eyeliner now.â
âWhy does friendship feel so much like punchingâ
âWhen I wake up in the middle of the night I am either thinking âwho am I? does my life have meaning?â or âdid I already eat all of the plums?ââ
âWhy are you so grumpyâ they ask me. they do not realize this is just my Face.â
âI know i said i would give my left arm for a cup of coffee but i am more awake now and i would like my arm back pleaseâ
âI guess I must have done something horrible in a past life. I mean. I definitely did something horrible in this life, so. â
OMG I LOVEEEE
YEEESSSSSSS!
âGuy in front of me wonât move his car seat up. I think that might still be upset about all those times I tried to kill him.â
âGot lectured by a guy who had been complaining about how things were Back In The Day. I donât understand why he got upset. I too lived through the Great Depression and was drafted for the War.â
âThe economy in this century sucks. Who exactly though another Stock Market crash was a good idea?â
âApparently, it was Rude⢠of me to pitch in my two cents on a conversation I happened to overhear, despite agreeing with them. On an unrelated note, I am no longer allowed in the ceiling vents.â
ââIf you donât behave weâll send (mutual) after you.â Jokes on them. Iâm the one who trained them to be an assassin in the first place.â
âTried to buy a Chicken Dinner candy bar at the supermarket today. Turns out they were discontinued 54 years ago. Super bummed.â
âWait. People were on the moon?! We got into space? There is a way off of this rock?! Why am I only just hearing about this?!â
â'Have you been living under a rock the past 50 years?â No I was cryogenically frozen for 70. I donât appreciate your tone young man.â
âMy friend likes convincing people that Iâm the Reckless one in our friendship. As if he wonât find an alley behind a bar to pick a fight in if I take my eyes off him for two seconds.â
âWhy would i want to get a haircut when instead I can look like i just returned from a 12 year jaunt in the wilderness every time i grow a beardâ
âwas having a hard time finding noodles in the grocery store & asked a clerk for help. she looked at me like a crazy person. lady, itâs not my fault you donât speak russianâ
âwhat kind of idiot thinks dancers are sissies? literally every ballerina i have ever met could kill an adult man with just her legsâ
âtoday i discovered Conditioner. the future is a miracle and my hair like a cloud nowâ
âapparently just jumping on to a moving bus when you are running late is not a thing people do anymore. please stop yelling at me.â
âwent to a club last night to see what the hip kids were into. apparently the latest thing is just having sex standing up with your clothes on in a room full of people.â
âon the one hand, people dressed much nicer in the 40s. on the other hand, yoga pants.â
ârode in a car with heated seats today. it is my house now. i live here.â
âi have acquired a small bear. i am putting a collar and leash on him. he is my dog. no one tell animal controlâ
âi am working on this whole Good Guy thing but anyone who cuts me in line at starbucks deserves to have their kneecaps shot out okayâ
âwhy did they have to make escalators so terrifying to get on and off of? from now on Iâm just jumping off the mall balconies. none of this awful moving teeth staircaseâ
âi donât care if itâs a âpriceless historical artifact,â punk, i didnât wanna do the dishes and it makes a pretty good spaghetti bowlâ
âhoodie pockets are so great. i can fit like three sandwiches and a grenade in there and my hands are still warmâ
âi really though we would have flying cars by now. the future is such a letdown.â
âchanged samâs ringtone to jesus take the wheel.â
âdo you know that feeling when you go to lean on your short friendâs conveniently arm-rest-height shoulder but you forget they had a huge growth spurt and you just awkwardly lean your elbow into the middle of their bicepâ
âi swear i didnât know your girlfriend was coming over. i always ominously clean my assault weapons on the coffee table like that. it had nothing to do with you.â
#peter follows the blog and has no idea its bucky (via themoonstarwarrior)
ahsjfjsa while Bucky was frozen the most common variety of bananas died out, we have a different now. heâs right the banana was Wrong
isnât that the neck tattoo guy
This guy needs to slow down đđđ
THATâS WHERE I RECOGNIZED HIM FROM
But how could you leave out this masterpiece???
I love him
yall r missing the BEST one
I might have just found myself a new idol
oh my god what a legend
I found my new personal hero