Barefoot and Celibate

please drop what you’re doing and watch how this episode of he-man was resolved. Watch how He-man and Orko deal with a giant demon that wants to destroy the world.

I wasn’t allowed to watch this cartoon as a child - and I didn’t try to - because it was widely considered too intense and violent for its time and I just took all adults’ word for it that it would give me nightmares or turn me into a criminal.

…..what???

Wh….what??? Who the hell says “campy relish” as a CRITICISM!?

NO??? EXTREMELY No???? This is the worst most boring most awful terrible idea you could ever have about this???!!!

Whenever I have crossed paths with the He-Man/She-Ra fandom I have always been in awe of just how little they actually appreciate these cartoons the way they were. Instead, they’re overwhelmingly in love with a darker and grittier version that only exists in their heads and in bland, lifeless comic reboots:

WHY do people want He-Man played straight?? They have a million other Conan the Barbarian rip-offs for that. Why do people want He-Man sapped of all the joy and wonderment and childlike whimsy and the “NYAHHHHH!!” that everyone actually, you know, has something resembling fun with?

“Make it more like Lord of the Rings or Game of Thrones” is one of the ghastliest, most repellantly sterile, anti-imaginative things I have ever heard said about a children’s cartoon and yet it seems to be one of the most common sentiments in the franchise’s “fandom.”

How can so many truly even believe such a thing will be good? Or has EVER BEEN good??? What possible fun or enjoyment can there be in a Skeletor that just says legitimately threatening scary things and kills people to prove how Very Mature the surrounding narrative wants to be? Who the fuck actually wants to see He-Man just lopping monster heads off or screaming in slow motion as his friends die to sad choir music?

FUCK that entire kind of thing.

IT’S GARBAGE.

IT.

ISN’T.

I wonder how many people understand that these are two separate things happening in different times. One is Caine coming more and more into existence and discovering the obsolete unused brain scans, and the other is Caine gaining access to the random WiFi hotspot that just appeared temporarily (as they often do) nearby. They’re both moments of self discovery which is why we cut back and forth between them, but they are undoubtedly not happening at the same time.

(Inspired by this post)

As soon as I saw this I knew I just HAD to draw Mikey with it.

This shitpost was NOT supposed to take three weeks, but at least it's finished AND posted TuT

now if only i could finish/post my other shit

not the archduke of austria

Have you gotten to reference layers yet because OMG.

The blue layer is set to reference.

Then you can do this.

He wasn’t just into copper trading. There are letters complaining about Ea-nasir’s business practices with respect to everything from kitchenwares to real estate speculation to second-hand clothing. The guy was everywhere.

The majority of the surviving correspondences regarding Ea-nasir were recovered from one particular room in a building that is believed to have been Ea-nasir’s own house.

Like, these are clay tablets. They’re bulky, fragile, and difficult to store. They typically weren’t kept long-term unless they contained financial records or other vital information (which is why we have huge reams of financial data about ancient Babylon in spite of how little we know about the actual culture: most of the surviving tablets are commercial inventories, bills of sale, etc.).

But this guy, this Ea-nasir, he kept all of his angry letters - hundreds of them - and meticulously filed and preserved them in a dedicated room in his house. What kind of guy does that?

Titus doesn’t know for sure who killed Seraphi, but he suspects it was one of his siblings.

In fact, he largely suspects Kalique, since she openly defied Seraphi on many occasions and was not as beloved as either son.

He tries not to think about it because he really likes his brother and sister. They don’t seem to like him back. He wants to earn their affection, so he performs for them. For Balem (who is always bored and dissociative) he tries to be shocking–or engaging, at least. For Kalique, he tries to be a liar, because that is how she sees him (and how she likes him best.)

When Kalique says, “now you sound like mother,” Titus snorts derisively, as if this is an absurdity. He wouldn’t want Kalique to think he is too much like mother.

I hadn’t even thought about this that deeply when I had that idea but it really would explain a lot about his fighting style. He’s really nimble and agile, lots of dodging, spinning moves, and flips, a far cry from the tank-like brute force approach you would expect from a genetically engineered soldier. It was probably something he developed on his own to compensate for being literally half the size of every opponent he ever faced…no wonder fighting Balem’s massive lizard guard didn’t faze him.

but yeah they talk about destiny a lot in this movie and I can just imagine Caine spending his whole life thinking he’s cursed and defective and worthless and then one day he meets his Queen

and he realizes that all the things he thought were flaws in himself weren’t flaws at all, they were his destiny, he was tailor-made to be perfect for her