Andrew would rather be back on his drugs than admit that Neil's smile still made his stomach churn in the best way possible. It had been over a year and still, the small glimpses or early morning smirks, they destroyed Andrew in everyway he would let it.
So it bugged him that Neil would almost always dig his fist into his own scarred cheek. He didn't do it as much in private, but under the public eye he refused to let the smile show. Andrew understood why, and respected it. But the annoyance came when the anniversary of the Butcher's death approached and Neil would force the smile back everytime. At Edens, in the morning, late nights on the roof. The slightest twitch of his mouth resulted in a knuckle against his cheek.
He wanted the drugs back because maybe they would stop Andrew from missing Neil's smile. Neil hadn't showed any emotion all day, even with the infuriating loss and the annoying media from their game, he showed nothing. Andrew and him sat side by side, not touching on the way back home. The rest of the team sat at the front of the bus, angrily venting about what had happened. That left the two of them alone. Andrew stole a glance at Neil, and then sighed. This was gonna hurt.
Neil turned his head towards and nodded, "Yep," he bit out.
"You're a fucking idiot, you know that?" Neil blinked, and finally turned to fully face Andrew.
"It's over, you're alive. You're safe, nothing but safe." Andrew clenched his fist and leaned back against the bench. Neil stared at utterly confused at the sudden outburst. "He's gone, you should celebrate that instead of-" Andrew stopped himself short.
Neil shifted, flexing his fingers and examining the scars that littered them. "I've lived a year longer than I thought I would."
And just like that, Neil's smile crept across his face. His hand immediately reached up to stop in and Andrew turned his glare on it. "Don't."
"Yes," Andrew didn't hesitate to grab Neil's wrist and guide it away. Away from that smile, the one that didn't belong to that monster. The one that belonged to Neil, Neil Josten, a fox, his idiot, his home. Neil watched him, and let the smile grow.
Neil leaned forward and cupped Andrew's face with his hands. His finger gently moved across Andrew's face and touched the lips which had curved into a foreign shape. "I like it when you smile."
