if you have tics you have a tic disorder

if you have at least two motor tics and one vocal tic you have tourette syndrome

I’ve been struggling a lot with Repetitive and Restrictive Behaviors

More specifically tactile stims and tics. Some of these things i can recognize as more voluntary tactile stims that ive done for a long time. But i often get locked into a restrictive and stressful loop of doing these stimulatory actions.

This has brought to mind some questions about the overlap and differences between Autism and OCD, with comorbity in mind.

since a kid i’ve had a few long with standing tactile stims/tics:

Hard, repetitive, excessive blinking.

Snorting

Excessive toe curling and interlocking of toes

Hard, repetitive, excessive scrunching and stretching of nose and philtrum

Clenching teeth

Picking and peeling skin

Uncontrollable nail biting

Rolling eyes back with eyes closed

Pattern walking by way of trying to step on cracks with consistent foot coverage and pressure

Some of these are a lot more visible than others but the visible ones gave me enough trouble in the past that i involuntarily developed more covert habits that stimulate the same area

which brings me to a tic that has been plaguing me for over a year now:

Excessively and roughly pressing my tongue against my soft palate

This is something that started as a self regulatory behavior triggered by emotional and environmental stimuli. Now i get into these loops where i can’t stop doing it and it stresses me out and hurts lol.

The same is true for the list of tactile stims above. I think i start doing them to self soothe then once i make the specific sort of contact i get fixated on how the pressure, contact, or motion should feel and then can’t stop repeating it.

This makes me wonder about the possibility of certain things manifesting as autism symptoms, ocd symptoms, or both.

To give some more context, I’m not diagnosed or self diagnosed as OCD. I am diagnosed ASD and ADHD. However, at the start of my mental health treatment journey the psychiatrist i was seeing identified and notated disruptive OCD symptoms that they expected my previously prescribed Prozac to help with. It did help but it also made me manic so they banned me from Prozac. (long story for another time or another blog lol)

In more recent psychiatric visits my intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors were outlined noted and proclaimed to possibly be elevated by my newly prescribed Abilify which i haven’t taken yet as i struggle with change and especially change in self care routine.

All that is to say that there does seem to be some overlap between ASD and OCD in my experience. This was corroborated in conversation with my friend who is diagnosed OCD we related when i mentioned these compulsive behaviors

Accidentally touching something in passing only to have to return and touch it properly with the “correct amount of pressure”

Intrusive thoughts of harm scenarios involving self and others

Intrusive thoughts surrounding health anxiety

drinking things in intervals of eleven

applying a correct numbered increment to actions and avoiding certain numbers

having to flip a switch or hold an object in just the right way

constant redoing of motions until they feel right

Something that initially made me unsure regarding classifying these behaviors as OCD is the fact that there doesn’t seem to be an anxious “what if i dont do this, something bad may happen” feeling triggering these things. That perspective may be naive or ignorant on my part tho which is why i’m diving deeper to learn more.

I think I might have tics? I’m not sure but I keep like twitching and like jerking my limbs and stuff and it’s really freaking me out and I have no idea what to do. I’ve been doing it for about an hour and it’s not stopping.

You have to unmask eventually.

Unmasking is even more necessary when your body is in constant management mode trying to appear "normal" while suppressing tics.

Your stress is increasing significantly while trying to appear neurotypical. You use a large amount of concentration while trying to manage your sensory outputs.

By trying to blend in with neurotypical people you are eliminating your body's ways of releasing stress after processing sensory. You are holding all of your normal ways of coping inside where you cannot decompress and destress.

Stimming is how you release internal feelings while processing the world around you. Stimming helps your body manage absorbing large amounts of sensory input. Stimming is a way of regulating your emotions during this. Stimming is how you sooth your body. Stimming helps you let out internal pressure.