woe to the republic

LESS LESBIAN COPS MORE LESBIAN COCKS AMIRIGHT!!!!!!!!

*street shot of zohran mamdani clad in nasty lil suit and hard hat* five months ago i was elected mayor of new york city. in that time, we have managed to COMPLETELY defeat the Staten Island Minotaur at no additional cost to the new york taxpayer

its crazy that megan thee stallion is not considered a queer artist by some people. the woman is not shy about the fact that she finds women attractive and likes having sex with them. she references it pretty frequently in her music, she made a whole song about enjoying having threesomes with a woman and a man, she made a Jennifer's Body-themed music video, she had Victoria Monét full riding her thigh on stage at a coachella, and there's literally a video of a lesbian interviewing glorilla at a party & asking who she would date if she was queer and her immediate response is "megan. megan like girls!" and then megan turns around and immediately starts flirting with the interviewer. i don't know what more you want. that woman is Bi Sexual and we should all be thankful every day for that. bi women are still bi when they wanna fuck men too you know. the fucking of men is also done bisexually.

Having seen some births now i can say that dog birth is amazing cos they just slip n slide out one after the other like a little conveyor belt. And theyre so little and unformed. And then UNGULATE BIRTHS ... are amazing for the opposite reason which is that 10mins after being born they are filing their taxes. Unless they are goats, in which case they are committing tax fraud instead

Goats are what is called a precocial species, which means that shortly after birth they are able to do many thimgs on their own, such as standing, walking, eating, and embezzlement

plenty of laughs to be had about toy story 9, fnaf, poppy playtime, tadc, stevens universe, underdeltarunetale, shrek realistic panic attack, bluey's nuanced takes on the middle east etc. but ultimately the prevailing voice of two generations and counting being "my toys have anxiety" has to be a warning shot across the bow about the present conditions of childhood, right

oh my god the slot machine company says i have to keep putting coins in their machine or Im Gonna Get Left Behind. thats so scary. and it has to be true because they know more about slot machines than i do

tv show like grey's anatomy except they're veterinarians. all the soap opera drama but there's creatures all over the place. "is that a gerbil on your scrubs or are you just excited to see me" but it's actually the gerbil, he's a patient and we can't be having sex right now.

really underrated part of the LotR films is when gollum gets exposition lines. like can you imagine? you're travelling with the most fucked-up evil little murder greyhound creature imaginable and he lives in a cave and doesn't know about potatoes but from time to time you have to ask him about local geopolitics. and he answers you

it must feel good as hell when you’re a horse and you take a big bite out of an apple like ttshoke

your command over onomatopoeia is unmatched bestie

one time a guy friend told me he was quitting league of legends and literally two weeks later she was on estrogen. these events are intrinsically connected in my mind.

There is still time [to stop playing league of legends]