your unreliable narrator fucking bit me

thats not how they told it

doc there is a fucking hole where something was

wikipedia editors are like if redditors were monks

physically im not here but mentally yeah im not here either 

starting a foundation that gives disadvantaged children one wild ass night at the club

Why the fuck are you suggesting putting CHILDREN in a club?

So they can sip grey goose, maybe have a cig, and feel the rhythm? Are you the fun police?

forgetting your headphones at home is the modern equivalent of leaving your sword behind in medieval times

2024 is a terrible year to be a henchman. The word "minion" is barely usable and you can't even say "goon" anymore.

Do you ever just look at someone and admire their beauty without it being romantic? Like you are so pretty but if you wanted to date me I would scream and cry and throw up

 i recommend learning other alphabets if for no other reason than it’s very fun to see people replace latin alphabet letters with complete nonsense for Aesthetic

as brutus said, tase him again

"love is what makes us human" actually it's 'select all images with boat' but go off I guess

the best part about being a Girl Who Knows A Lot About Star Wars is that you can fuck with dudes so much. no guy has ever been able to refute my backed claim that moff tarkin canonically had sex with a stormtrooper. why? because doing so would force them to admit they've never read 'of mouse droids and men' and therefore know less about star wars than me: a girls' girl who thinks that luke skywalker and the mandalorian "are probably in an open relationship".

Moving house tomorrow

Be careful, I've heard they're heavy

I mean surely we all grew up feeling like there was a wrongness inherently deep inside us that will endure for the rest of our lives