And I mean, I get that this is more compensation for annoying tropes, and maybe some book stuff mixed in (from what I understand, the show definitely puts a bit more emphasis on the kink than the book does.)

But IN THE SHOW:

Ilya is the one who, after a nice little race/show of dominance at the gym, hands Shane his water bottle and commands him to drink. And commands him to keep going, just because he can.

Ilya is the one who, at the CCM shoot, starts jerking off in the shower at Shane. Then later, in the hotel room, you could even make an argument that he engages in both orgasm denial and forced orgasm kink when he pretends to leave before reciprocating and then continues the blow job swallowing, despite Shane trying to push him off.

Ilya is the one who tells him to drop to his knees at All Stars.

Shane keeps Ilya on the hook for two years, but Ilya persists in sending an unsolicited dick pic and flirting/propositioning the whole time.

Ilya is the one with a past with someone who, at least to my eyes, seems to be playing brat to his tamer in Russia - with the implication that the game itself isn't new to him even though the rejection is.

Ilya's the one who initiates the bathroom scene in Vegas (2.0). He's set up the exhibitionist scene in the penthouse suite.

Ilya is the one who says "No, after" when Shane wants to talk at Ilya's house. Then during the sex scene Shane initiates, is the one commanding "make me" and spitting in his hand. (I mention this only because I've seen this scene cited as a reverse of the dynamic, and I disagree with that interpretation for the aforementioned reasons.)

Ilya's also the one giving commands during phone sex ("glasses stay on") and making advances when Shane is on the phone with Hayden at the cottage. And, while it isn't sexual, I will never let go of the way he scruffs Shane's neck during the latter's panic attack at the dinner table with his parents. IN FRONT OF HIS PARENTS.

I'm not saying Ilya ISN'T romantic. Or that Shane isn't a very enthusiastic participant!

they met at some sort of fundraiser or event and she strikes up a conversation with him, and at the end of the night she oh so subtly asks if he wants to grab dinner (food at tthe event sucked) to finish their conversation about the technical differences between mens and womens professional hockey, an offer shane takes very literally because he's very invested now and actually enjoying this conversation, and at the time has very firmly drawn the line in his head that there is absolutely nothing possibly romantic about hockey.

when her teammates ask her how the night went the victorie player is like "he was really nice, listened intently to everything i had to say, laughed at my jokes, paid for dinner, didn't tell me about how much more difficult mens hockey is. he treated me like the best conversation partner he's had in a while. he's gay. he just doesn't know it yet."

it becomes a thing that anytime the montreal mens and womens teams are at an event together, all the women love talking to shane, and his teammates (who don't know about the not-date because he's never mentioned it) tease him about how he's such a ladies man and he should ask one of them out, they'd definitely say yes. meanwhile the victories all like him because he's actively not hitting on them or talking over them and he really just wants to talk about hockey.

like they're so used to every conversation with an nhl player ending his him disrespecting the pwhl in some way and acting like they should be impressed he's a professional athlete (like they aren't professional athletes too!!) meanwhile shane starts conversations with "so i watched the documentary you recommended on the first womens olympic hockey team and-"